it is freezing all the time.

i had two perfect fall days in a row this week.
thats hard to do.
im trying to squeeze in more pumpkin and apple pickin next week. and bonfires. and sweaters.

i got a fresh bandit scarf from my homegirl gadget, and its fresh to death.
i also shared the secret wizard house in the mountains, and bought two owls made out of stone for my sweet honey baby, the guerrsh, and that was also dope.

i have some kind of flulike coughing and aching now, that i didnt have before, and that sucks balls, and i havent been shooting yet this week, which also sucks balls.

i even had some super raw vegan creepy shakes, but they didnt help.

last night was indian food. my butthole is not excited.

word.

my sister turns thirty today.
crazy.
shes my little sister, too, so thats cool for feeling youthful and shit.
falafel, yo.
ive been on an unsupported quasi-fasting experience.
a ferocious raw food asshole exploder in the a.m. (its juice, with pollen and cacao and shit[and shit].....and raspberries)
and coffee, yo.
and a falafel a day...
intake of 1000 or less calories....
my head hurts and my pants dont fit.....
next stop christian bale, baby. ( in 'the mechanic')


why do lameass artfuck haircuts all look hitleresque? seriously, front face combovers?
the gayest person in the world called, and he said you look really great....

hard cocktober.
sober octoberfest.
root fucking beers.
bon fucking fires.
and my oldest seed ripens up to age 7.
lucky lucky lucky.........

misfires and misconceptions, yo.
broken volvos and faulty valves, fuel and aortic.
hearts break, and then attack, so fight the fuck back:

hit them in the head.
uno out.

tomorrow starts the fair.
when you live in the woods, you get a week-long fair every fall, and they have falafel and baby pigs.
i got a tattoo on wednesday, but it was only a little bit of tattoo, but it felt like lasers cutting off my foot.
i also had some type of acid throat esophageal hot death happening which was worse than the laser amputation.

i have a job, but i dont really care very often.
i have hundreds of dolls too. i make them so hard, and need to sell them for dollars.
i want to build a house.
im not even a little bit kidding.

i also have all these paintings made out of cereal boxes, but i need to sell them for money too.
maybe i should have an art sale?
a while back i thought of having a traveling art show, and visiting all my peoples spread out all over, and selling shit all along the way.......but mostly, i would end up just spending the money on gas and food, which would be the opposite of gettin mad celery stalks in my account.........

post equinox, post full moon, hot humid t-storm magic...........this day is fully gay.
no me gusta.

butthole.
i have had such a surreal last few days.
and i barely accomplished anything good.
i feel like cameron in ferris buellers day off, only i didnt eat pancreas or see mia sara in her undies.

i met some folks from electric pretendfriend time, and probably did very little to ensure actual friendship besides offer up a futon and a potential hot piss enema reality.

i missed a lot of targets today, too.
in a row.

so anyway, the cliff's notes go like this:
i act like im drunk? but im actually not, and i talk alot, and draw some stuff.
i eat indian food and then my butthole spits hot fire. i have a lot of guns and a sweet new crazy sas sweater.
i bought lanterns and worklights for photoshoots, but no white sheet like i originally planned. no bonfires, only dirty work. and thats what hurts the most. except for the other thing, that actually hurts the most, but this hurts the second most. ridiculous. the end.

also, get someone from the greater illadelph suburbs to say january in canada. them jawns is dooooooooooooooooooope.

uno out, and btw:
they pompoms, bitch.....

yes.
thats the answer im looking for.
as in:
are you an asshole? yes.
are you tired all day every day and cranky and shitty? yes.
are you pretty much done? yes.

yes yes yes. yes. yes.

i'm telling you. repeat your daily affirmations of pro-active positive living:
" everyone you know is an asshole. everyone who is not me is an asshole. i am an asshole. "

for real.

anyway,
its finally fall fair season, and cold nights and hard times are definitely making me feel manly.
nobody good likes me. nothing personal.

word,
wu-tang!
hit them in the head,

yep.
a whole bunch of my people just left.
we've had a lot of visitors lately, and thats been rad, but its nice to just be us again as well.
i am a creepy hermit.
i make no effort to be otherwise.
i have trouble relating to other people in practice,
but i am infinitely empathetic in theory.

so instead i shoot guns at pizza box targets stenciled to look like zombies.
hit them in the head.

yeah!

art. guns. maybe gettin shitcanned (again) from another place.

why do i do it? why do i care about where and who i work with? why is it that i always end up in a battle royale with my employer?
i dont steal.
i charge aLOT, and dudes pay that shit in full.
im almost never ever late.
i stay late, i arrive early.
and i HATE being told what to do.

oh, wait, theres the problem........

i am a born dissenter. a defiant defier, and a realness-keeper extraordinaire.
sometimes, i just dont know when to give up. like cool hand luke, except not in jail exactly, and not as handsome.

so where am i gonna work next?
looks like the white mountains are about to get a little whiter, once my black ass is outs.......


wu-TANG!!!!!!!!!

teeth.
yeah.
xrays reveals things. like my stress level is helping to burn a hole in my throat. maybe i'll even lose my voice. thatd be amazing, since the grating sounds that constitute my voice are ironically the only thing i really make work for me anyway. (its certainly not my hot bod or wet-box-inducing good looks. word up. maybe a weeklong vow of silence? i dont kow if i could handle a full week of tattooing completely quiet.

august is my 'material fast' month, where i dont buy anything and try to save a few bucks so i dont freeze or starve all winter, sort of a cricket and the ant story.....grasshopper, whatever.

i went to see the bread and puppet theater with my small humans. it was amazing, and refreshing, and depressing, and humbling, all at the same time. divine reality comedy circus. and pageant. and awesome.

the local coffee shop is displaying me and my sweet honey baby's art this month and next month. niggas who want dolls and collages and paintings need to get at us with some cake.....we'll see. mostly, 'up here' people just talk about how they didnt know we were good at anything, and then hate us for it. small town mayhem. every day in north conway is like the entire avail song catalog.

yeah,
after a while, playing hermit actually turns into being a hermit. anybody know the last time they saw me in person? yeah, me neither. i dont even have a 'call list' of dudes i talk to anymore......
but i DID do three different battle swords, with the latin for brothers on banners of kids whose swords represented their friendship AND their d&d characters......thats dope.

on that note,
+3 firebrand, +5 vs. lycanthropes, +3 saving throw vs. cold based attacks..........

wutang.

hey ya'll.
i have an 'up-here' tooth.
sunovabitch.

seriously, i was just saying how i was starting to feel like i belong 'up here', and a week later i have a funky toof.
relax, its gettin taken care of tomorrow.
you cant sleep on nappy teef.
nobody wants a butterscotch mountain range for a grill.

which presents its own hassles, as ive never met a tannin i didnt like.
and i even floss.
sunovabitch, i say again.....


teef, yo.
wu-tang!

ammo.
gotta have a lotta ammo.
its so true.
without ammo, a gun is just a paperweight.......

summer fun in the white mountains, ya'll..........
too much coffee, too many tourists, too much weather, and never enough time........


spit hot fire,
wu-tang!