so my mind's in a strange place today. I spent friday night at a friends house and slept there. it was an amazing night. he's so passionate and sexy and kinky (of course). =) we stayed up all night in eachothers arms doing freaky shit, and when the sun finally started to come up and shine through the trees outside his window, I realized that having someone you feel totally comfortable with and trust immensely, can be completely open with and there's that mutal acceptance...well, it's so rare and beautiful. and when i thought about this as I looked at him and he kissed me, i got really scared. it's scary having so much to lose. yet, throughout the night, a smile never left either of our faces. ::sigh:: so today my mind's in a strange place because in the past i've often jumped into things because i felt something special, something new. however, while my time with him is both of these things, it was sooo much more. I just can't have my heart broken again. i guess it's a pretty common fear, but a fear nonetheless. next time i see him, i've decided to just tell him all of this. honesty can never fail...and i'm hoping it fixes some things as well.