I suck at life.............i wish i could quit, but it just not my style....BLAH fuckin Blah...

ugggghhhhhh still winding down from my weekend madness. i was security at the indie fest in pagosa and i am fuckin worn out like crazy! plus all the partying didnt help, man im a fool sorry johnny for the "dis" i really shjould have rechecked my priorities and realize that i mad a stupid move, oops! can i get away with a sweet smile and wink? so i was hanging out with a rockibilly band from canada Cousin Harley, they fuckin rock! i had a great time with them they are definatly my kinda kats. thank goodness some cool people come through this town once and a blue moon (bree goes off singing blue moon...saw me standing alone, without a dream in my heart or love of my own) and ways back to this blah blah about me, i have been trying to do the single thing gracefully and choose wisley(hummm you know what i mean?) anyways this has been hard because there is no quality men around these parts, well girls either really. i think im going abstanet for the first time in my life.......ha Love Bree

So im totally retarded, i got pulled over yesterday by a state patrol(cop) because i didnt have my front license plate on, who knew you were suppose to do that? i never did it in cali!!!!!! parents remeber to add that to the list to teach your children! And then i got pulled over again by a different state patrol this morning, but i do agree with him, i didnt stop at two stop signs, but damnit there were no cars and its called a cali roll! wtf! But im lucky, i begged him to just give me a warning, and i gave him the sad puppy dog eyes, he loved it! Then when he went back to his car i crossed my fingers and toes and prayed to god, he came back and gave me a warning! THANK GOD! I am one lucky bitch!!!!!!!! Thank goodness im a chick, if i was a dude id be paying a lot of money!!!!!

well havent done this in awhile, its funny to think i sit here and rant and rav and nobody reads it. i guess we all just need to vent sometimes. Im happy! im happy im happy, gotta just keep telling myself that. i have two gorgeous babies that i would do anything for, i have my own house thats gonna be sold someday soon to buy a much bigger place somewhere else. i wonder where we should go, maybe back to cali. no the boys will not have a good upbringing there, maybe somehwere were i have never been. i cant believe how all your dreams as a kid can be washed down the drain like spoiled milk, i was gonna be big, i wanted to be a model, or actress. Did you know the day of my last modeling class in sand diego i found out i was pregnant? i wonder what could have happened if i never meet dave, bet things would have been a world different, i know i wouldent be here in colorado, id be in hollywood in movies and modeling for gucci or prada. ahhh well i guess trading a life full of money and fame for beautiful babies and a decent living is equal. blah! Bree

i just got back from alabama, ive never been in my life and have to say the place is pretty fuckin boring. unless your a honky or someone who likes to do nothing entertaining, then thats your place. my uncle passed away in Iraq(apache pilot), thats why i went. man i cant believe how emotional stuff like that can be. I mean he was only 41, he had two daughters and a wife. i really feel sad for them.........could you imagine? well anyways things can only get better......like my boyfriend put in anew wood floor for us and he made jesse a "big boy bed" its sweet it has flames for a head board. yeah and i actully got to shop when i was down there. cant believe how much i spent, thank goodness i got my tax return, pretty good chunk too! anyhow///// Luv Bree

Today basically havent been online much, just trying to finish some unfinished buisness and good stuff like that. im drinking this monster energy drink called Assault, id have to say its my favorite energy drink of all time. GOD i miss cali. anyone from cali wanna let me stay with you for a couple weeks? id be a very fun house mate for the week. well gotta go do something! Luv Bree

Im not bitching but.........................................why is it that with some people i have this crazy love hate thing going on? i see them and i cant even say hi, i just want to run away and hide, the only things i do manage to say or do are rude. i really just want to be friends, can we be friends? please? i miss you, we had some fun togather, didnt we? cant i come over and play pool and drink a couple pinstripes and maybe a shot of jamison? we could have fun coudent we? yeah we could, but you wont let that happen. Do you know why? because you dont want to fall........am i right? well dont be sooo scared. I promise to take care of you, dear friend! do you know im talking to you? im sure you dont and you probably couldent care less! I Love You! Love Bree

Things are going amazing for me................... I already got my christmas present, a Canon powershot SD600 digital ELPH.....oh hell yeah. my baby loves me! Luv Bree
PS life is good.....................

well i was going to explain a little about my last few weekends, basically they have been consisting of drinkin my life away, dying my hair, drunk dialing my exs, and crying until i feel asleep. im not even unhappy, shit s great, what is it with having to be unhappy about nothing with me? does anyone else do these things? acting out like a child because things are soooo fuckin amazing right now i dont know what to do with myself. Its like i want to be cursed with a horrid life so i can have something to cry about, (fuck no im not emo)! I just wish that i could be free like a bird and run away, go back home or out of the country by myself, just be free to do whatever whenever no matter how fuckin nuts it is and say fuck the world. but yeah this is "the real world" and ive basically done all i can to act out for now. ill stop this ranting and raving im just hyped up on coffee and a little upset at a friend i like to call dead guy...................................




the second pic is on a better note(my love Shawn)............................Luv Bree

IM SUPPOSE TO GO TO THE SHOW TONIGHT IN ALBAQURQE NM, HOPEFULLY MY LOVELY MIKE WILL SAY HES TAKING ME AFTER ALL, OTHERWISE I MIGHT MISS OUT ON THE LOVELYS AND I DONT THINK I WILL BE ABLE TO LIVE WITH MYSELF! WAAAA WAAAA WAAAA I REALLY CANT MISS YOU GIRLS............