I think I have a boyfriend.

What the cock is THAT shit?

man, i hate dating

its worse when i think I might actually like the guy.

and its even WORSE when I think the guy might like me too. seriously. what the fuck am I supposed to do with that???

its happened. i look like a drag queen right now.

oh, how i wish my camera had a memory card and batteries in it right now. if this looks half as good in photos as it does in the mirror....heh...i'm AWESOME.

Wrote this like a week ago but forgot to post.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Neighbors who have come over when they see me outside to come say hi: 3

Neighbors who have seen me but NOT said hello: 0

Number of Mango and chile paletas eaten over the last 3 days: 5

Number of places to buy mango and chile paletas within 100 yards of my house: 4

Water heaters purchased: 2

Water heaters installed : 1

Number of copies of keys made for my house: 5

Number of keys lost so far: 1

I left Austin late tuesday night after dad offered to let me use the jeep that night so I didn't have to spend another day in my 97 degree house.

So far, I like it here . A lot. A whole lot. I love my neighborhood. I will have to take pictures soon. Everything is nearby. A pizza place that has beer and shows movies every couple weeks. A big ol HEB. About 4 bus lines that take me to most of the places I'd want to go (art house movie theater, my dad's house, the fabric store, SuperTarget, woodlawn lake, downtown).

I subscribed to the paper on the weekends. I will force myself to read the paper in the mornings instead of just getting right to work at 9am and working til 10pm all weekend.

My shower doesn't quite work right (read : at all). I have to take baths only until I get someone out here. It's like G-d is forcing me to relax. And I like it.

I got internet installed finally but it isnt quite working right. My laptop charger went kaput on wednesday. I ordered a new one. Then today, I thought "hmm..let me just SEE what happens when I plug in the old one" and it works. See. Just like me, it needed a day off. So right now I'm on my computer, listening to NPR, using stolen wifi from my neighbor and drinking an iced chai.

Tomorrow, if I can brave he rain, I answered the call of an ad I saw.

"If you like CLEOPATRA JONES, REFER MADNESS, or RETURN TO THE VALLEY OF THE DOLLS, you'll want to be a part of the Expoited Ones! The San Antonio Exploitation Movie Club. Organizational meeting September 13, 2-5pm"

Yes. I think I'd like that. Then a movie with dad and drinks with a friend.

Things are good here. I'm eating better. Getting lots of fresh air. Sometimes it takes something drastic like a move to get me to realign myself.

The good:

I own a house. Closed on the house around 4pm on Tuesday. Keys in hand. Panic of something going wrong has subsided. Panic of realizing i need to have a water heater moved (its right now in the middle of the kitchen which, no), buy a fridge, stove and some new furniture AND paint all before the 18th, from Austin, rising.

The Very Good:
Met my new neighbors on monday night. Gay. 3 year old adopted son. Obama sign in the front yard. Its like the holy grail of gay neighbors. They are so so so nice and we sat and drank a beer and talked about who on the street are nice, who keeps a crappy yard and who just doesn't talk to anyone.

The Bad:
Came back to my house in Austin at about 7pm Tuesday night. It was 86 degrees inside the house. My A/C is obviously not working. Motor sounds like its working but no air. Compressor? Fan motor? I don't know but its hot as shit. I have all the ceiling fans on and a floor fan on full blast RIGHT IN FRONT OF MY FACE. My dog also has a fan on right in front of his bed because he's a spoiled brat.

The Bad but its really not so bad:
So, My AC doesnt work. but you know what? I move in 2 weeks from today. So am I gonna fix it right now? Fuck no! On Thursday the 18th, right about this time, I'll be at the new house (which, we're going to assume has been painted and has a water heater where I need it) waiting for the cable people to get there. I then take my dad to the airport for a weekend in Chicago with his friend Robert and use his truck to come back to Austin, load up clothes, some personal things, my boxes of kitchen stuff, make a stop at ikea, come back to the house, get the cats and the dog and officially move to San Antonio. I'm leaving some stuff in the house (ill be back and forth for the next few months so i want a place to sleep) so its a small move.

If anyone is in SA on, or around the 20th of Sept and wants to help me put together reasonably priced, Swedish furniture, I'll provide the sangria

i'm leaving for san antonio tonight so i can make sure im in SA tomorrow for a 3pm appointment to close on my house

please keep fingers crossed that nothing goes wrong and that I come home with keys tomorrow night

So. you may wonder what I do with my life when I'm not buying houses and talking to perverts for fun and profit.

Well, here is my day.

Woke up. Googled for an hour to find cheeky boyshorts or thong panties that wont 1) show labia and 2) be too sheer that you can see my pussy under the glow of a spot light. seriously. This is a concern of mine.

Being a bigger girl, cute, well fitting underwear that are stage appropriate are not easy to find. Trust me. Ive looked. And I looked and looked today. So i was going to go to lane bryant and hope for the best but I'd have to make sure they were the right shape. So I decided I would just cut a pair of my own panties into the shape i wanted and then take them with me in my purse. Cos thats totally normal. Right?

But then something AMAZING happened. I cut the panties and instead of them fraying all to hell, they stayed intact long enough for me to dot a little fraycheck onto the edges to keep them from getting a run in them. OMG! Why didnt I think of this sooner. I spent most of the morning cutting panties into more ass revealing, burlesque appealing shapes.

I then went to the fabric store with my friend chelsea to get some last minute things to finish my costume for the upcoming burlesque shows we have this weekend. thats right...shows. Friday night we are booked for the annual Austin BBW bash. Saturday is the regular show that I produce.

So we go to the fabric store. I spend 58 dollars in fringe and sequins. for 2 costumes. We are talking about going to watch Obama's speech and the last night of the DNC from this bar near the university. We decide that the occasion calls for obnoxious hats and hair decor.

we bought all kinds of feathers and flowers and ribbon in various shades of red white and blue. She also bought a little rubber donkey. Because. yeah.

I dont have a photo of mine yet but here is what her's came out to look like.



Yeah. Exactly. I am in love.

So, this is my life. Held together by hot glue and velcro.

So. I turn 30 in about a month and 3 weeks.

I like to get myself something cool for my birthday. I'm at that age where people don't really get you gifts. They just get you drunk which is, ya know, awesome but...yeah.

Last year I bought myself DJ lessons. I now have a new skill that I can use to...well....dj a great party. But whatever. I can dj. properly. And I think only one person on my friends list can do that.

So. yeah. that was 29. This year? 30. yeah. wow.

So, today, when I checked my myspace messages, I saw what HAS to be the best birthday gift ever.

There is a photo studio here in town called 666Photography. Check their shit out. It's amazing.

So, today, I see this message:

So yeah. Happy birthday to me. hopefully

Still waiting to make sure I got a spot. I wrote them about 25 minutes after they posted. They have just 12 spots so keep fingers crossed.

*EDITED* : Just heard back! Got a spot on November 16th!!!!

closing on the house is pushed back just a little bit. no big whoop. means i dont have to start paying a house payment/prop taxes/ins for another week or so.

I've been listening to Mott The Hoople's "All The Young Dudes" pretty much non stop today

we close at the end of this week.

woo