gosh. i owe so much money to so many people.

i try not to think about it, especially as i currently have no way of obtaining money, but its kinda impossible to avoid. i am drowning. if i don't get a job soon, idk what's going to happen.

this is the second year in a row i can't afford to buy christmas gifts for my family. i owe hundreds of dollars to my roomie, my brothers, my mother, and my aunt. i owe thousands to the irs. i have four weeks to come up with the next rent payment, and i havent even paid all of what i owe for last month.

its a good thing i met this girl, or i'd be losing my damn mind right now. she does not know that, and i don't think it's time to tell her.