Ok, so I know its been more than a month since my last post and I had pretty much given up on writing in it as my aimless existence has continued to be...well, aimless. So there wasn't much to talk about. Yes, I did just get a job and will start Monday and yes, it is at a game company working as a gamesmaster in an MMO which is about as close to nerd nirvana that one could get, but that is not why I'm writing. Let me explain and maybe by explaining it, I can help myself understand exactly what this is.
I'm writing because the only girl I can honestly say I've had a crush on for the last 3 years or so, Glitch, actually commented on my last post.
Ok, to be honest, I don't know if crush is the right word. I mean, I'm 35 years old. Do adults have crushes? (not that I'd ever really classify myself as an adult, but I am starting to look like Mr Fantastic with the whole gray hair on the sides thing so I'm not young, that is for certain.) Furthermore, having a crush on Glitch is like having a crush on a celebrity. In all probability, I'll never have the honor of meeting her, I don't REALLY know her outside of her profile, blog and pictures. She's more an ideal than a real person, even though she is a real person. Finally, for all I know, she may just comment on everyone who posts a comment on her member sets to thank them for helping her get the set chosen as a set of the day. I honestly don't know.
Here's the catch though. When I logged in and saw that she had commented on my last post, it was like the cutest girl in high school saying hi to you in the hall as you walk by. It's just a friendly hello, it shouldn't mean anything, really. But it does. And the rest of the day you walk around thinking 'she said hi to me." And you feel damn good. That's how I feel right now. I wish I could feel like that all the time.
I guess what I'm trying to say is this. Glitch: Whether you actually read my silly post or even if you had some auto-response program that just sent out a comment, thank you. You made my day. And with the kind of stuff I'm dealing with now, that means a hell of a lot. Seriously.
Self: Yes, you are 35 years old and you have a crush, deal with it.
Addendum: It must be really weird being a Suicidegirl. I can't even imagine the kind of insane shit they get from members, nevermind my own psychobabble. I mean, its odd to me just commenting on the photosets and trying to not feel like some weird pervert. It must be even more odd to be the model. Or maybe not. I don;t know. Hopefully more another day.
I'll leave you with this, an interpretation of a real-life Pac-Man.
I'm writing because the only girl I can honestly say I've had a crush on for the last 3 years or so, Glitch, actually commented on my last post.
Ok, to be honest, I don't know if crush is the right word. I mean, I'm 35 years old. Do adults have crushes? (not that I'd ever really classify myself as an adult, but I am starting to look like Mr Fantastic with the whole gray hair on the sides thing so I'm not young, that is for certain.) Furthermore, having a crush on Glitch is like having a crush on a celebrity. In all probability, I'll never have the honor of meeting her, I don't REALLY know her outside of her profile, blog and pictures. She's more an ideal than a real person, even though she is a real person. Finally, for all I know, she may just comment on everyone who posts a comment on her member sets to thank them for helping her get the set chosen as a set of the day. I honestly don't know.
Here's the catch though. When I logged in and saw that she had commented on my last post, it was like the cutest girl in high school saying hi to you in the hall as you walk by. It's just a friendly hello, it shouldn't mean anything, really. But it does. And the rest of the day you walk around thinking 'she said hi to me." And you feel damn good. That's how I feel right now. I wish I could feel like that all the time.
I guess what I'm trying to say is this. Glitch: Whether you actually read my silly post or even if you had some auto-response program that just sent out a comment, thank you. You made my day. And with the kind of stuff I'm dealing with now, that means a hell of a lot. Seriously.
Self: Yes, you are 35 years old and you have a crush, deal with it.
Addendum: It must be really weird being a Suicidegirl. I can't even imagine the kind of insane shit they get from members, nevermind my own psychobabble. I mean, its odd to me just commenting on the photosets and trying to not feel like some weird pervert. It must be even more odd to be the model. Or maybe not. I don;t know. Hopefully more another day.
I'll leave you with this, an interpretation of a real-life Pac-Man.
So, I am really glad I made your day!
Glad you liked my new set!