I have a crush on this lady :



i know i'm kind of a creep...

it's so snowy & beautiful!

i thought it sucked at first but then i realized it doesn't at all.
it's lovely & amazing

& you can make snow angels in it

oh no.

i dreamed about her last night.

i have a whole bunch of work to do before break on wednesday

here's a strange story:

this girl that i don't really know very well came to my room to see if i wanted to study. as i was getting my stuff together she asked me if i had ADD (because apparently i was taking a long time or something?) & i said i didn't think so. people always say i am the most ADD person they know so i asked her why she thought that. blah blah blah we talked a bit & went to study. then she was like well since you probably have ADD here's some medication. it will help you with your homework.

i was kind of hesitant about taking a pill from some creepy girl but then i thought why not? so i took it. i researched it afterward & it was just concerta. so i felt better about it.

most of the day i have been flitting around all crazy. i got some homework done. did some errands. now i'm feeling kind of sweaty & nauseous.

i think in the future i will avoid taking other peoples medication.

I have an ache behind my eyeballs
I feel tired coming from a deep place

I would like to make some changes in my life - so heres what I'm going to try to do:
stop smoking
stop drinking (or at
least cut down)
be more responsible
about what i put in my
body
get sleep
go to all my classes
do all my homework

Smitten Kitten came to my school to talk to us about safe sex toys.

It was really very lovely.

I was supposed to get my labret pierced today & my friend was going to buy it for me but she didn't get her paycheck so now I have to wait.

It's only 12:27 but I haven't slept since... a long time ago so I am going to try it out & see if I can do it.
Sleeping is rather difficult for me.

So good night & wish me luck!

I am really pissed off.

For one thing- I'm in a bad mood & I just want to be by myself.

Jessica came back & instead of helping me with homework she took my computer so she could download shit onto it & go in chat rooms. I kind of needed to use my computer but she wouldn't get off for more than 3 hours. I went to my room to be alone & she came to tell me I could use my computer & left. So I went & got it & I was feeling better & now she comes in- gets in my bed- & tells me to wake her up in the morning.

I wonder if it ever occurred to her that maybe I would like to sleep in my bed?

So now I'm sitting here all pissed off with her sleeping right next to me & I will probably have to go to the lounge because just being in my room right now is filling me with anger.

I am so frustrated & feel like rambling on forever but it probably isn't really worth it.
I'm just venting.

Oh, & P.S.
I'll try to post pictures of my outfit & the other girls that hope to convince to go as SGs too!
It will be RAD.

So I'm going to a costume party on Saturday & guess what I'm going as...
a suicide girl!
I have a cool wig, & awesome underwear & big boots.
My friend (who does tattoos) is going to draw on me
& I'm hoping to get some fake piercings.

My friend Jessica (who I heart) is taking me with her to get my labret pierced for an early christmas present as soon as she gets paid. I'm real excited.

I was sad earlier but then I dressed up & now I'm really happy & excited & hopeful.