I'm finishing up an overall shitty week. I don't want to spend time with that, but instead focus on a hopeful turning point that's happening. I think things are going to get better. Let's see.

I'm in the process of getting a rather large piece of tattoo work done. It starts on the side of my hip, goes up my ribs to my armpit, and comes around to my shoulderblade. It started with a fixation of the mythical beast, the Phoenix. I spent a good bit of time looking over the net for images and other tattoos, but nothing really jumped out at me. I took a stab at designing myown tattoo with colored pencils, and brought that to a carefully selected tattoo artist. He must have tried so hard not to laugh when he first saw it!

Jay, the artist working on me, drew up something that was much more to my liking. I have to laugh a little bit now when I think about the difference. I have trouble trusting people, and so far Jay has kept my confidence.



Right now, I'm 3.5 hours into what will probably take 14-18 hours to finish. I'm really pumped to get more done next week. When I get more done I will have better pictures to show.

Setting Dates . . .

A very peculiar theme has been emerging recently: setting dates for a break-up. A friend of mine tells me that he had a fight with his girlfriend that brought about the virtual end of their relationship, just MOMENTS before opening Christmas presents! This really is a friend of mine, so I'm not certain how it segwayed to them still opening their presents, but they decided to put off the fight and resolution until after Christmas. Well, after the holidays, they determined that they should break up, but set the date for the official break-up two weeks later! In the interm, they are hanging out and doing things! WTF!!!! I just don't get it.

Another friend has been dating a girl for 2 1/2 years now. They have lived together for over a year with her son. He treats they boy like his own. Recently, he said that the apartment lease will be up for renewal in a few months, and that just might be the date they break up!!! He says they've had a few fights, and both him and her have brought up that date. He is seriously contemplating an exit strategy.

I don't get it at all. I've been to the point where I am ready to break up with someone, and I won't have much of anything to do with them from the moment I've made that decision. I understand that it can take a bit of time to setup the break-up, but I won't let the relationship slide until they decide to break-up, or keep someone around just to fuck them. It is really hard for me to do that, but that's who I am. I find it difficult to go through the motions; living out a script that's already been etched. I can understand if you hope things may change during this period of time; things can be rough for awhile and you have to give them a chance to get better if you want a relationship to last. Neither of my friends have put out any indication they have hope for the future, other than they hope the break-up lasts.