i didn't go to KT's birthday party tonight, even though i think she's super cute and she's been pretty friendly. to top it off i'm actually feeling kind of lonely the last few days. its the dead of winter, and i mean dead. work's getting intense and there's not much outside of waking up putting in 9 hours, maybe hitting the gym to work on last year's poundage and come home. i do get out probably more than most, but nothing is ever enough for me. ever.

i've been spending a LOT of time on SG chat, it's been a blast and i've really enjoyed it and learned some interesting things about myself.

1) i am more canadian than i thought i was
2) i am more polite than i thought i was
3) i am more shy than i thought i was
4) i am more of a hornball than i thought i was.

all to be expected i guess.

just need to check in and remind myself that it's not life.

life has been kind of dissappointing lately. its a phase, a mood. it'll change. life always changes, its about change.

i still miss her.

i guess that's really the thing isn't it.

it'll take as long as it takes.