Yep she makes me pretty damn happy. Happy enough to try and like Christmas time. Not an Easy feat. Hope every one is doing good.
For Bradley haha.
Anyways this girl (i cant call her new because we've known each other since the first day of JR high) got ahold of me out of the blue and we started chatting and then boom instant connection. Like one soul in two bodies kinda thing. Shes awesome to hangout with, talk with, sleep with and other bedroom activities. Just happy with her up and down right now. Smitten if you will. However with be litterally being at work for more than half a day each day and her working two jobs we make the most of when we are together.
Now a sappy part. Im sure every couple has "a song" and we kinda do but this video is funny cause I couldnt have said the lyrics or even the scene before the music any better.Because these are the kinda voice mails I leave her.lol. She does keep me waiting alot and I'm more than fine to to it for her. 18 years later and we found each other again.
Hope to see everyone soon.
First To my dear friend Drama for not making it to his birthday party last night. With one vehicle leaking oil and not up for long drive and the Jeep missing its motor I couldn't drive down. Then after finding out I could get a ride almost 15 minutes AFTER I commited to working the weekend with the new hire trainies in my department at work (leading into the next appology) I couldnt back out of the weekend work. Sorry Bro i'll make it up to you.
Next to the people who wrote in my last blog and the messages I got about my meditation exercises. Sorry but I am the worst person when it comes to explaining and describing things or how I go about doing them. Even though I have the method in my head I do lack the abitity to orally put them out. Hence why when i'm "training" someone to build a generater the most I can do is tell them to watch me and try to do as good or better than I did.
To the person I said i'd make a delivery to this weekend and failed to get it to.
I also need to post on the party thread for the end of the month. got a couple messages as to why I havnt yet and will do so soon. I'll try to be gentle to the comment I want to be a smartass to.
Next some things i've learned lately or even more understand now. Alot of my unahppiness strangly enough comes from my father. I've told a few of you about him and when I say the man who raised me has a short fuse I mena the fuse doesnt exist. Hes a ball of anger and negativity. One which I strengthen my patience around just smile and walk away. However finding ways to avoid this/him (we actually work in the same manufactering plant, hes on 1st shift im on 2nd my choice go figure) and releasing whatever downer thoughts he puts in my head is tricky. I'm not big on anger or unhealthy acts of violence so I take it to meditation and occasionally the heavy bag at the gym. Love the man to death but like I say "Just because you love them doesn't mean you have to like them."
I talked to a total stranger yesterday about positivity and what it means to us. He told about what all he's lost in life and when he went to prison and about why he cant complain about any of it. He told me about letting go of everything and starting thing anew. Meant alot to me and made sence to what I think about alot. So i'm going to start putting them into my exercises.
Anywho when I got back home 2 weeks ago I decided to buy some things I had been putting off. Luckly when I checked prices everything was on sale. SO I got two of my favorite tv series comlete dvd sets that day and bought my parents a new flat screen tv because the floor model theyve been watching for the last 20 yearsneeded to go. Dexter and Batman:Brave and Bold marathons are on now.
When I got home these were in the mail.
Which calmed the nerd in me. Speaking of which i'm looking forward to reading the final issue of FlashPoint and all the New 52 books. Also about to read the newest Rolling Stone issue interview with Grant Morrison. Not his biggest fan but i'll see what the get out of him. Also check out the Cintia Dicker in Mens Health and am taking some of her advice. first was the comment about underwear.
Wrote typed this while watching True Blood so it took longer than I expected.
Hope everyone is doing well and have a safe and fun Labor Day.
Last song I heard before my "adventure" and first song I heard when I got back. I don't believe in coincidence but I do believe that it made me smile big. Checked my not touched for 10 days phone. Took a half an hour to get all that cleared.
So many visions. I saw some happy effin things for my self. What I want and what I am denying myself. Clearer mind and a much missed smile are the thing i'm shooting for today. Thanks everyone for the texts.
I suppose i'll get a better blog up later. But for now i'm hungry and need some pizza.
P.S I had a vision of her and she's a mermaid. Time to go hands oin swimming.
The night started getting chillier and I dont like it. Fall is good and so is spring but I want a re-do on my summer. Didn't get everything done i'd hoped for.
Even though I concider myself a romantic when I'm really into a girl i'm always open to suggestions so when I read the last issue of mens health and the tips some brazilian model was giving, when I get back i'm going to put some of these into play. Some were goofy. A couple were common guy sense. But who knows maybe they only work on brazilian models.Or maybe I should write my own and compare them on here. <---- Can you tell im still not fully awake.
Getting ready to start my "vacation" with all the meditating and what not I talked about last blog. Again hoping for a renewed feeling soon. I've decided I wont be answering my phone.In fact i'm leaving it at home. Got a prepay deal for emergencies only. I'm already wondering how many e-mails texts and calls I will be missing.
Hope everyone has a fun and safe time til I get back. I'll let you know how ity goes.
So i'm thinking about getting away on vacation next week and NOT do the strength training workout (still lighly exercise a bit because its just what I like to do) no answering the phone, little to no contact with anyone. Just personal exploration and a good mental reboot through some new techniques i've looked into. This is something I was sceptical about for awhile but willing to try something different. Even If it seems a little too much like that new age thing a few years ago..."the secret".
After I get back i'll update again on whatever I figure out and come up with.
Also I want to thank everyone who has been texting, calling and messaging me about my sisters condition. Shes doing much better and it mostly cosmetic healing from here.
I think I need to plan a late august early septemeber hangout dinner night out hangout after I get back.
Hope everyones doing great.
Alissa, Phedca,xheartswornx itsafork, and his lady, Rainbow, Ru5ty, Tovi, Cashmir, Essence and usedupfool for showing support and hangingout with me in my sad state last night. I can't tell you how much it means to me and how happy i am to have you all as friends.
Also to my P.I.C and potential future roomie Drama for the place to stay last night. Thanks again Brother.
And since it cheers me up imma repost my loot along with the latest addition.
NEWEST:
I really don't go out shopping much however yesterday I went out and visited several places in a row and to pick some thing up for this weekends luau I ended up getting a few thing for myself. See if you can see the pattern.
Had to spend some nerd money. Any how hope to see you guys this weekend in c-bus for said luau.
Edited to say that only a few hours after this post when I got home from the gym I recieved the following in the mail.
and
Sick addiction?1? I'll think i got one.
Anyways summer rolling on and when not at work or the gym i've been spending time either outside enjoying the heat (screw anyone that bitches about the summer heat then nags about the winter chill we get here) or clearing out my house out.I've been racking my brain about buying a house here or not after my incident EVERYthing was in bigger question than before but i'm still keeping it all in mind.
When I go to the gym the owner and my friend usually work out together so generally we end up have pretty deep and yet silly or "man" conversation as he calls it. Since he's now going through a divorce I've been hearing quite a bit "horror" stories or relationship warnings. This has brought up thoughts about relationships and everything that comes with them. Are they worth the B.S you both go through? Is there actually an HONEST girl out there? So many questions I ask til I just dont care anymore. Not just his stories but other guys at work and in general with their stories too. Learn from others mistakes or make my own? I've had the girls in the past that set new standards for why did I waste my time with you? I generally stay friends with my exe's however the ones I really truely care are of course the ones that really get to you. With the classic guy complaint of building yourself esteem by having said girl pick the controling asshole boyfriend that cheats on them over a fair shot at romance. Oh well. I'll just smile and respect my own and peoples choices with the out comes they get.
Another semi-off subject thing is recently there have been 3-4 girls I can't seem to sway myself away from. Not that i've made any kind of effort toward any of these girls it just kind of bugs me that I let these girls stick around in my head.
I've been tossing around the idea of get a really cheap 87 jeep wrangler so I can strip it down completely and rebuild it into something of a "showy" vehicle. Yet I think i'd be tempted to drive it through mud holes and swamp as often as possible. For what it is however i'm getting a good deal on the jeep alone.
I really don't go out shopping much however yesterday I went out and visited several places in a row and to pick some thing up for this weekends luau I ended up getting a few thing for myself. See if you can see the pattern.
Had to spend some nerd money. Any how hope to see you guys this weekend in c-bus for said luau.
Edited to say that only a few hours after this post when I got home from the gym I recieved the following in the mail.
and
Sick addiction?1? I'll think i got one.
Seriously psyched to take the jeep out and do some mud running. Then mud sliding (outside of the jeep) beers with good friends and bands.Then cleaned up and to Stooties Mohawk(the bar) for amazing food cooked by an old stoner friend. Dino shoot outs and camping. Anyone thats down on let me know. Epic I tell you!
What I hope to look like tomorrow.
In other news Im hitting some roxy and concrete for the gym to hit a lifting goal I now have. Starting a bit of meditation that my friend and I have been talking about. Goes well with the Budikai. Seriously this all started where I swore I was getting super human abilities(not the cool Flash kind) a week ago. Long story have to be drinking to tell you. Also giving up sugar (other than fruit) til july 29th. Why that date?
SGOhio Luau on the 30th.Last year was a blast and I made some firends that I dont remember making ( sorry girls) but Drama helped put some of the pieces together. Want a light up Lei? Show up.
On another note thinking about cut some ties with a few people I once concidered good friends. Earlier this year some things happened and pretty sure I'm to the point of not giving a shit why. But i'm not good at cutting ties.......i'm great at burning bridges.
Hope everyone has as great a weekend as I plan on having.
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