All the children have their greed for toys sated for a little while.

I'm home again. Horrible trip to horrible places this time.

I'm home from sea.

I went to see a friends band play last night in Portland. It was fun, but I really enjoyed the cider.

Why do I always wake up with the feeling that someone punched me in the stomach?

All night drinking again. It gets really boring after awhile.

I spend the morning regailing a poor young man on his lack of class. I'm a little sorry, but not really. Someone has to set a standard.

I was told once
That the stars that twinkle
are actually planets
Out to Sea
away from lights
They all fucking
twinkl

Now that my head has Cleared.
I see it was a mistake
Not to come for you.
I think I need to cloud my head again.
To see what my wisdom was

My cigerettes and coffee are fighting to corrupt my stomache
I feel dirty
Nights of drinking
Nights of dispair
I'm not alone in this
I'm surrounded by the dispair of other
We all revel in it's loneliness
We pretend it's us alone
We know this misery is common
but we have to remain somewhat special
Otherwise what would we be


I don't want to continue with that thought
I don't know if it's honest
I like to lie
I lie to everyone
I lie to everything
I lie to my senses
I don't know what's real anymore
There's only so much you can twist your body
before it forgets the truth of anything
I need a new lie right now
Something I can wrap my lie of happiness in
A figurehead
A grail
A blind faith
I want to revel in the glory of a god I created
It's easy now
I'm starved for it
I can make myself believe almost anything these days.