Update.... for the 2 people who read this. Heh

I got a new car It's so lovely having a new vehicle for the first time in such a long time.

Unfortunately, the process to getting it, I was so stressed out that I gave up on quitting smoking. I was in over a month, but I failed. I'm back to cutting down to only 2-3 a day and I shall quit soon.

Work has been going well, and since I'm going back to my original position I've been a lot happier there as well.
Joe and I are also pretty darned good *knock on wood* at this moment.

I turn 28 on Saturday. Unfortunately, unlike the last 27 3/4 years, I've recently took to digging into my mind to try and figure out why I am the way I am, and events that brought me to the person I am today.
I don't like who I am. After so much reflection, I now realize why my oldest two sisters are so bitter towards my mother. At face value, I had enough to move to another country and basically disown MYSELF from this family, but really sitting and focusing thought on the things that happened (which opened a can of worms so jam-packed i wish I hadn't) has led me to a road I never knew existed.
Without getting specific, it means nothing to anyone. Only Joe and one of my sisters knows where I am at right now, and I'm seriously thinking about seeing someone and discussing it to sort these things out. Until I DO sort these things out, I can bare to even have a conversation with my mother, who until recently I thought was a damn good parent. If i talk to her, I will blow up on her and verbally assault her with too many truths that I know she's lied to herself about or buried for many a year. It's not fare to live in her house, and give her the silent treatment, but if I blow up on her... well, there is enough worry for me not to.
I need to sort this shit out before it eats me alive.


And I need to close this can of worms, because memories I myself had buried a long time ago have been taking free reign whenever I try to go to sleep, and random moments I would have otherwise found peace inside of my quiet mind.

I miss days of silence inside of my own head. Now it's a constant battle of my voice against my own voice.


Everything is vague, I know.
I wish that for once I could be normal.
But that path was ruined ever so long ago.

As I sit here, ever so sexy, in my rolled over black socks, girl white beater in bland, and my purple underwear... post attempt at filing my taxes, if I may add... I must ponder...

Or not. I'm not capable of deep thought right now.
I am, however, 2 1/2 weeks non-smoker.
I am also STILL working through what remains of the awesome flu/pneumonia crud I had earlier this month.
I am also pondering buying a new car... b/c my 2001 Cavalier is ever so quickly losing it's clear coat, and rusting pretty horribly in those spots that usually start to rust after 8 years. (I write great run-on sentences)


I just started typing a long thing. But I don't care anymore.

I caught some Super-bug.
Which is in the acute pneumonia phase right now.
I normally work Sun-Thursday, but a call for Jury duty had my schedule switched to Mon-Fri. THANKFULLY.
Yesterday it was really bad. I was so feverish. Sweet Joe took care of me all day. He stayed up the last two nights listening to me breath and barely getting any sleep. I'm on antibiotics and some nasty cough syrup crap, but I will tell ya, this is no game. I am zapped for strength.
I haven't yet been tagged to go in for jury duty, which is a surprise. I'm 372 of 1100, and for the second day they only got as far as 321 in the queue. It was a blessing for today, as I would have been a mess trying to sit at the court today, but I would have rather spent the day at court tomorrow and not hurt my work dependability, then just call in like I know I'm going to have to.
It's a real crying shame that I could legitimately end up losing my job because I got sick. They always say, hey just get a note from the doctor, but in all reality, a place like mine, they don't give a shit. Sigh.

But it is what it is. I drove from Joe's this morning, and a normally 10 minute joy ride turned into white knuckle b/c I felt so horrible and my depth perception was so off. When getting off the couch I have to take a couple of minutes to get my balance, lest I black out and fall over.



If only five people read this bloggity blog, please watch for any flu symptoms. Even if it's just a fever, go and get Tamiflu from your doctor or the ER. There is only a 24 hour window to use it and it can prevent this super bug.
I would hate for any one more person to get as sick as I am. Much less a child.
I am almost 28 and perfectly healthy, but I am so ill walking up the stairs is hard.


otherwise, drink your juice and go to bed early, bitches.

things have been really good lately.
i just need to get my focus at my job so I can post out of this sales position.
I'm just not as good at sales as I had thought I was in a similar position. It's just too different, and one has to accept when they have been wrong, and do what is necessary to correct that.
My employer is a great CAREER place. If I screw this up before I can post out, then I will be missing out on a huge lifetime opportunity.
BLAST! If only I could get proficient and hold it for three months and get onto the Internet team or QC.
If anyone reads this, send me some peacefully positive mojo.

The relationship thing is renewed, and going very well. Very well, indeed.
I'm delighted that I just realized that September 14 2013 is on a Saturday!!
More on that if it becomes something of import, like I hope it does.

Sometimes I forget that I have an SG account and I hop on here after a good bit.
Sometimes I am surprised by the actual SG's on the front page, other days it's a bunch of porn star drop outs.


But there are great people on here who's faces I would eat if I could.


That makes me happy. Because even though the site has changed, those people still fucking rock.





However, coming home after a day of selling insurance and seeing my cat puked on my bed.... does not ever fucking rock. bastardo.

"we"

i like the sound of that

My day has been incredibly boring. I started off by waking up at 6 a.m. at Joe's house. After an hour of getting ready and whatever-ing, we headed our separate ways. Me- to my residence, Him- to work.
IAfter I ate my traditional egg breakfast I retreated to my room to do the normal time wastery. I'm grossly out of shape yet again. Staying on THAT wagon is the hardest of hard things for me. So I've been researching good floor exercises to get variety so I don't get bored and fall off again. I spent an hour doing that.
PS, after reviewing numerous stories about hoola-hooping = weight loss, I'm almost tempted to go to Target and buy me one. LOL
The main reason I am starting with floor exercises is because int he beginning of the year when I tried to just throw myself into it, I ended up jacking up my knee. I've come to terms with the fact that my joints, mostly my hips and knees, are just not OK with this weight, and I need to do some losing, before I can go gung-ho again. It makes me sad, but I need to do it the right way this way so I keep on the right track, and get back to where I need and want to be.

Anyways, I did some researching and prepping for my "book" as I like to call it for about an hour. I then hit iTunes where I downloaded the following:
[YOUTUBE]http://youtu.be/6cfCgLgiFDM[/YOUTUBE]
because I love my little chunky monkey Christina

[YOUTUBE]http://youtu.be/1WifEFI6eK8[/YOUTUBE]
Because I love the breakdown

[YOUTUBE]http://youtu.be/e-fA-gBCkj0[/YOUTUBE]
Because it's so very much like The Police, and I like the sentiment, when you don't interpret as just sexual gratification.

[YOUTUBE]http://youtu.be/R4em3LKQCAQ[/YOUTUBE]
I actually fell in love with this song before I knew it was the Biebs. When i found out I got sad, because I realized I had to give him $1.29 of my money.... then I watched the video and DIED because Michael Madsen is a huge, MASSIVE crush of mine from my very young years... and then it starts to suck b/c he is so young and there is a bit of choreography and I can't deal with that. So, close the screen and listen to the lyrics.
This also reminds me of a rhyme about friends being gold and silver, and that sentiment reminds me of my epic friendship with Joe and what a great base it is for our love. I can't wait to get it on in my car.

Lastly...
[YOUTUBE]http://youtu.be/Gwx4iTRLXG8[/YOUTUBE]
I'm a huge sucker for a duet, but I LOVE this song. I just DO.

Anyways, i pretty much put that 5 song play list on repeat all damned day. While I rearranged my room, scooped cat shit and spent lord knows how many hours on Facebook and Pinterest... I jammed.

Eventually I had a sandwich for lunch and showered and prettied myself up (for no apparent reason)

I've pretty much done NOTHING. I mean, I took a nap from about 630 to 730, where I woke up very warm and slightly cranky, but that is about it.

Joe didn't want company tonight, which made me a tad bit sad, so I went on to watch the movie Abraham Lincoln, Vampire Hunter, based on this:



Now, I own and have read the book, and this movie is SHITTY. I mean the book was an obvious 10. The movie gets a 3 and that's ONLY because there are a few fight scenes that are VERY well crafted.
It really is a travesty when a book is so poorly transformed into a movie. Harry Potter went 7 for 8 for the books to movie (they failed pretty big on The Goblet of Fire movie in my opinion) and that's something hard to beat, but this is just horrid.

Anywho, It's 11:35 pm and shortly it will be daylight savings time, but I have said FUCK YOU and changed my clocks ALREADY! HA! It is 10:35 pm in MY world BITCHES!

Here's some stuff that made me giggle the last few days:

I NEED THIS SHIRT!! Someone buy it for me!




That is all. I think I'll go creep into bed and pretend to sleep but really play Angry Birds in Space for a little bit. heh



edit, apparently no matter what link I use I cannot get the youtube videos to just post... and that makes me angry. eff your SG for being too complicated for me. hahaha

It blows realizing you're not a priority to someone.



Yet I continue...oy. Silly bitch.

Leaping lesbians.

This asshole just keeps popping up in my life, and every time it's like getting hit by a freight train.

I moved back with my parents to catch up on finances.
I live in their basement room, which is pretty cool beans with me, with my two cats.


My love life is nothing.


My work life is moving along.


I am very blonde again.

I am a little mad that I checked in only once to see if my account was even acctive, and SG decided to just re-up me instead of emailing me and asking. I had no intentions of keeping this, but thanks a lot assholes, I'm stuck with it for another year.
It would be nice if you could cancel and they would prorate a refund.
I really have no interest in this site when its always the same broads on the front page mixed with failed pornstars and wannabes.