Last week I wore my underwear inside out and backwards all day without noticing. I guess my front and back are symmetrical. I've been trying to find a way to connect this to a statement about the size of my penis such as: "My penis is as big as my butt" I don't think I've quite gotten the right spin on it yet.

Today I hit myself in the eyeball with one of those rubber finger cots while wasting time. Ok karma, I get it, I'll get back to work...Soon.

I got a freelance job offer for really simple things and felt bad for the amount I'm charging them to do it. But I didn't feel bad enough to change my rate. Maybe karma is making up for the underwear thing. I mean, what if I got hit by a bus, they'd find my underwear on backwards and inside out.


Plus I would have been hit by a bus.