Hello good SG friends,

so I am still alive.. I am just busy as fuck (even though at the mo I am sick and at home.. so some time for the net).

I got a full-time job at a children's museum. I am behind the desk to greet our little guests and tell them what to do in our museum; I pick up phones; I book groups and parties and search the people to guide these groups, parties and our arts&crafts workshops. Also I help the children's panel: a group of kids that comes round every wednesday afternoon to test the workhops, expositions and for example the website, and with their judgement we change things or keep them the same. I love the museum and the team I work in; and my work will get better once the new exposition opens the 8th of october; now it is quite boring and consisting only of computers and getting lunch. So I do this 4 days a week, twice a month I work the weekends (nooo....). And then tuesday is my study day, still have to finish the thesis, 2 essays, a literature exam and one series of classes. Preferably before february. I am so dead tired these days. Getting up at 7.30am every morning is killing me. I don't want to play the pity card, I am just saying. I have slept my life away for about 4 years. I have to get used to this. I hope I will soon; I am knackered every evening around 9pm. Sometimes I am scared I am just one of those people that cannot handle a full-time job; that I don't have enough energy in my body for this. The future will tell.

I also have something else that is quite tiring (and at the same time energizing!): a little kitty. I named him Dub, after my new love in music. He is so playful and cute and very naughty! He usually wakes me up a couple of times during the night, knawing on my tunnels, trying to creep into my nostrils or mouth, or attacking my fingers, toes, or eyelashes. But he truly is my baby, he is so fucking cute and cuddly I cannot stay mad at him for long, and when he meows a bit too much I worry if he is sick or unhappy. It is a reasonable forecast to what I will be as a fresh mommy: overly protective! I will be one of those crazy bitches that calls their doctor for every cough and every sneeze! He usually sleeps on my left breast.






Furthermore, I am still addicted to shopping, which I should try to control now as I have a huge electricity bill to pay; still the taxes; a tattoo appointment the 18th of october and probably a session or 4, 5 to come after that (yes; I will be starting my arm soon.. is it normal to start to doubt before you start such a big endeavour? I suddenly had doubts before my first tat too.. it was deciding between virgin skin and tattooed skin. And with a very big visible tat it is deciding between tiny hideable tats and being out there.. right? I want to be out there, I have always loved heavily tattooed women, it is so gorgeous! And I love my idea for my arm!).

Also, my niece lives with me at the moment, because she started a study in Leiden but she lives too far away to travel everyday. My niece is a cool young partygirl slash lesbian and the living together is not as bad as I thought; even though I hope she'll find a room in Leiden soon.

And, last thing on my mind, I am still in love with my ex boyfriend, remember, the one with the fear of commitment. He still wants to be with me too, but the relationship thing freaks him out, still. Yes people, I know this relationship is doomed; fuck that; I'm crazy about him.

I hope you're all doing great.
Lots of love, Gwen.




(Could you resist this??)

What the FUCK happened here?
My whole lay-out is totally fucked up.. all letters are overlapping, I cannot reach my friends blogs..
fuck.
Am I hacked?
This is crazy shit.

So, I might have discovered the recepy for a break-up recovery.

It goes a little something like this:
Go to your favourite shopping town on a very sunny and warm day, with an extra special friend (in my case she just came back from a nine months trip round Asia and is going back to her hometown in Sweden on monday) when the sale is on and there is a festival in town so the shops are nice and quiet.
Buy underwear that makes your boobs look fucking hot. Buy panties that are see through, yet classy.
Buy all your favourite brands, on sale. Don't forget to buy shoes!
I bought:

Also a Carharrt top with leopard print, baggy Levi's jeans (love 'em, too bad Maurice wasn't at the shop Faat!), a Levi's top and to top it off: A new fucking comfortable pillow. I left my good somewhere sometime and have had 2 shit ones for ages. Thought about buying two new ones for a while but it always seemed so much money; and I didn't want to buy only one good one and leave the man with a shitty one. So now I have one hell of a nice pillow.

But not like I'll be sleeping much tonight.. I have 3 parties to choose from

.. so I won't reach my empty bed soon.. sigh.. I am still sad to be honest. But I feel a little bit better

Have a nice weekend, enjoy the weather, and those momenths with your loved ones.

X

I went to Dour festival. It was awesome. My boyfriend surprised me by coming too. I was so happy!
He said he loved me. He said it took him too long to say it, nine months, and that we should say it more often.
But we couldn't once the dope and alcohol wore off.
Yesterday we lay in bed and I asked him if he remembered what he said. I couldn't get the words out of my mouth this time, just barely. Then everything went to hell. He is unhappy. It's not me, but it might be, because everything went too fast for him.
Now, I might lose him.
I had the best weekend ever with him. He couldn't stop kissing me, he said he loved me and that the whole relationship thing wasn't half as bad as he imagined. Now, everything is fucked.