I have this problem where I just break out in song and dance, where ever I am. I like to drive around and listen to Tom Petty ( American Girl) is one of my favoriet songs.

Did you know that my nickname use to be the black widow... I hated it still do I think it's something that I hate the most in my life. I'm a litte down... so just bare with me

I hurt a friend (again) for being honest about my feelings. I thought telling the truth was suppose to set you free? but it does it, it make's me feel crappy and the other person worse.

I just wish that people could understand that it's better to be my friend. I am friends with people for life. I won't talk crap about you behind your back and I will be completely honest with you,

I have respect for people and I'm very forgiving. If you do hurt me I will wish you the best take what I can from the lesson and move on....

But yet when I hurt someone ( I don't do it purposly) I get called every name in the book and get called out harressed and so much more.

I'm tired of always having to live with the way I feel or think about a situation, while so many people can destroy each other and still look at themselves in the mirror in the morning.

My friend told me that I have this special little light about me, that I get noticed, and he wants apart of that, He said that I make him happy and he has so much joy being with me. He's lonely and he thinks I can give him something to make his life better.

Does he not understand that people can't make other pople happy it has to come from you and only you. He wouldn't be happy with me, hell I love my space, I hate when my phone rings and sometimes I just want to be left alone.

Free spirit he said that I am, So what if I still make snow angles , run barefoot in the woods and dance it the rain...... I'm nnot here to be used for your enjoyment for your lonely life...

sigh