There is so much I want to do, but I just don't know how. I realized the last few months that my life isn't what I want it to be and I'm not where I want to be. I had loads of friends a about 5 years ago then I broke up with the ex and she started spreading shit. so now I'm left with an hand full. I guess I know who my real friends are. even though I have them I don't really see them. they live in a different town to me, I wish I lived closer, but I don't like the town they live and plus it would be closer to my ex. I tend to day dream a bit to much. my best mate I feel more and more like he don't want nothing to do with me no more. Thing is I'm the only one who drives out of my mates and my best mate seems to always think it should be me who travels to see him. and he has no ambition what soever. He is quite happy to sit on his ass all day. does my head in, I like playing computer games like most but 24/7,. come on there's more to life then that. he moans he wan'ts a girlfriend and I tell him your not going to find one sitting in your room all day. To be honest I think why the hell do I bother with him.

I'm bored with life, I want that something or someone to light that fire, show me a good time, make me smile again and laugh. ( I mean in the non-sexual way)