Every few years I seem to wander back in here. The boobs just seem to make a bad day fade away. Yes, boobs make almost everything better.

Rice is Seattle bound. See you guys on the flip side. No internet for a few weeks I think.

Back. Again. Hmmmm.....

I woke up this morning and felt something crawling on my leg. It was a fucking tick! Shit, I hate those fucking things. Luckily it hadn't bitten me yet, so I just killed it and threw it in the toilet. Then it dawned on me... check the dog. Yup! The poor guy had one in his ear. The two I found were really small, as opposed to being engorged fat asses full of blood. So I fear that some more might be lurking under my poor dogs hair, only I can't find them because they are too small. I have also become super paranoid that there is one on me somewhere that I can't find, that shit ruined my morning. Damn. Now I'm all paranoid of ticks.

Thanks to all who enjoyed the magnificent story in my last post. I moved my bed in yesterday. After we loaded it into the truck to bring it over a torrential down pour started. My mattress and box spring both got thoroughly soaked. So I turned them up on their sides and turned the space heater on them for several hours both yesterday and today. They did finally dry out. God apparently doesn't want me to have a bed, but guess what? I WIN!

I've been watching a lot of Macguyver lately. I own the DVDs and they totally rule.

I've been waiting to post this because I hate typing, but the story must be told.

I've been sleeping on an air mattress now for a couple of months while being lazy about moving my bed to the new apartment. Well, Tuesday morning I put my elbow down into the mattress to help facilitate rolling my fat ass carcass over, and wouldn't you know it... My elbow goes right through the top of the mattress. I just laid back down while the bed deflated thinking about how lame this was. Suddenly my inner MacGuyver kicks in. I get up, go into my bathroom and cut a chunk out of my shower curtain (I had already bought a new one, but in an extended fit of laziness had neglected to put it up for several weeks), I get some super glue, and I glue this square of shower curtain over the hole. Unfortunately, I glued it too close to the edge of said hole, so.... Back to the bathroom to remove a smaller section of the shower curtain, overlap the first patch with this piece to cover the rest of the hole properly. BAM! Shit got fixed! Right?

Well, as fate would have it after re-inflating the bed I could still hear a minor leak coming from it. So repeat shower curtain gluing to the bed a third time to cover said leaks. I had been putting my ear right next to the patches this whole time to listen for any possible leaks, which I would locate and attempt to block with glue. Now, as we all know, working with super glue is often a messy affair, and of course my fingers were covered in super glue. However at one point while putting my ear to the patch I managed to get some glue (which I thought was dried dammit!) on my forehead. While attempting to remove this spot from my forehead, I noticed a very minuscule amount was also in my eyebrow. I foolishly attemted to extract it which resulted in me accidentally waxing my eyebrow, not the whole thing, but just a chunk at the edge. Later that night I even found some glue in my hair. Fail.

The end result is a bed I have to re-inflate every night before laying down, and waking up every morning sleeping on the floor, as the mattress has completely deflated whilst I was sleeping, and a partially waxed eyebrow. I have now realized that I am definitely not MacGuyver.

Holy crap! Whoever reactivated my account thank you so much, and I love you! BOOBIES!

I might go gray for a bit, but just like Frosty I'll be back again someday. As everyone knows, I moved. Money is kinda tight right now and I can't justify looking at boobs here, when I need the money to eat. So remember, I loves you guys, but I also enjoy eating. Once my job situation is finally squared away I can afford to come back I assure you. I'm not totally sure when my account expires but I got the notice that I needed to pay up. Bye kids and much love.