Oh man, Just got back from All Good X. 3 Days of delicious music and drugs and cool people and music and drugs. Found a new band from balitimore that I will be going to see soon. Don't know if anyones heard of The Bridge from baltimore. They were the shit though. Disco Biscuits were awesome, Black Crowes were awesome, and of course Les Claypool = the epitome of Awesome. He played almost the entire of whales and woe album which for anyone who hasn't heard it...it's delicious. The only bad part was that me and my friends all ran out of money before the Wailers came on and it was just too hot to stay with out more water and food and drugs so we left. But it was one of the best weekends i've had in a long time.

Life is not a bitch, Life is a beautiful woman you only call her a bitch cause she won't let you get that pussy, Maybe she didn't feel ya'll shared any similar intrest or maybe your just an asshole who couldn't sweet talk the princess. Great stuff. Work, school, stuff keeping me hella busy now. I barely have time for much. And I can't get....someone off my mind. --- But on a similar note, got someone off my mind which is nice. By the way, I'm CRAZY about a Lesbian.

It's failure as me the creator, So would you tell him what to do? But on a lighter note. I had a shit load of fun yesterday. One of the best days off in history for me at least. And...that ass. Damn it was the nicest. We'll just have to see how she felt about me pretty soon. I'm supposed to hang out with her again on friday. we'll see how that goes it should be hell fun.

Seriously. It just is fine now. it's been a little while and I think i'm fucking over it finally. But now....there is another girl i've known her for a good 3 years and i am falling for her hella hard. just....i have so little self confidence when it come to girls. Not that i'm not worthy of any girl out there...it's just when it comes right down to it I just can't find the words to say anything to girls about dating. I want to ask her so bad to go on a date. But I just dunno if I should and I want her to say yes so bad that if she doesn't.... And this is how I always am about girls jus tthat this one is a friend. I would totally love to date her and take our friendship much further but if I ask her and she says no she seems like the type that things would just get wierd and I know I would try so hard to not let them and all this other shit. Damn. Just when I see the light, I can see that it wasn't that I couldn't find the light but that I was running from it. And I can't stop. It's like I dunno cause everynight I wish I had someone to call and just talk to and know that everything is alright. ANd I want to say stupid shit to her when we get ready to hang up and end up saying bye over and over again for like another 10-15 minutes before someone actually hangs up. I pine for this. Have you ever just sat somewhere and just yearned for stuff? Try it. It'll close doors you never knew were opened.

What the fuck is up with life. Whenever you think things are going ok something fucks up. I know it isn't just me. But it feels like it. What's worse is when someone fucks you over, through no fault of your own. God I THOUGHT I WAS OVER HER! I wish I was. I REALLY REALLY DO. I would almost pay to get over her. I know she hasn't done anything good for me in a year. But I just don't see myself doing better ever. I loved her SOOOO MUCH. She was my life. I need a job and a new girlfriend like life. And I need friends near my home. Cause now some of my friends in MD are getting tired of me(not having a job.) I need to go out and have fun. and get a girlfriend. and stop feeling so fucking lonely. This is so unlike me to be so depressed. I haven't felt happy in a year but before this i was happy for life. I haven't ever felt this way before it started a year ago. Someone come kick my ass for this. PLEASE. Damn it feels good to just bitch, whine though. Even thought I hate it.

Yeah....Saw harry potter last night. It was good. Today I went to a redskins vs. raiders game. It was cool I finally got to see my team play a game and they won! There were a lot of people in raiders colors which was cool. But on the way home through metro I felt like I was trapped in "The Warriors." But most importantly I found out that a girl I wanted WAS recently single but now she is already taken and I am really bummed out about it and I don't know why. I guess I really wanted to at least see if I had a chance. But ever since I have gotten to know her she has always had a boy friend. DAMMIT!

So. I got to see Las Vegas and that was it. Then I had to use all the money I had to fly home because the people I was traveling with's father was supposed to give us $8000 for the trip. And he didn't cause all he does is do speed and drive. Seriously. He spent 2000 of our 8000 on gas while we were there cause he drove from cali to texas then to reno nevada in 2 days. But he wouldn't come to las vegas cause I guess he just doesn't care about his daughter....

WoW. Right now I am sitting at my computer and I can't wait for tuesday. I am going to vegas with a few friends and we are taking a huge road trip across country and I can't wait. It is going to be hella fun. And I just bought a video Ipod for the trip. Damn those things are sexy.

So. I finally moved to v.a. with my mom again. Eh. Whatever. Soon as I get saved up I am gonna get out of here. In a few weeks I am going on a HUGE road trip to cali and then helping my best friend drive over to maryland and we are gonna hit seatlle and canada and minnesota and chicago. Damn it is gonna be the shiznight!

Life. What the hell does that word mean anyway? Can it have a true meaning? Because my life right now just doesn't seem like life at all. I think my life should be called work. It would be so much simply if people said "hows work?"Rather than how's life? Oh I have only been working. then they so ah hows THAT going??? See. try it.