It's very difficult to tie one shoe with the same tension as the other one, because if one should be a little tighter than the other, the day is gonna suck. I'm a girl of symmetry.
One thing I do know for sure is that toilet paper is extremely jealous of stationery. And office paper. And paper towels. All paper, really.
There's nothing I hate more than going to a concert and the guy says 'You having a good time?' and you scream your head off and then the guy says 'I can't hear you!' and I'm like 'The fuck you can't!'
Provisions are dangerously low. Nothing but crayons left to eat. Must build a raft of popsicle sticks to escape this wretched island.
Life should always have the energy of a Ramones concert. If you don't agree with me, just listen to "It's Alive." 2 seconds between songs. Woo!
I'm tired of being pro-active. Today, I shall be neg-active, meaning I'll do something but with a really bad attitude.
Who wants cake?
Anybody?
Cake?
What if I spelled it "Kake?" More enticing?
What about "Kayque?" Better?
Anybody?
"Cay-Kah?"
No?
Does anyone else feel insulted when you're waiting for an elevator and have already hit the button and someone walks up and hits it again?
Anybody?
Cake?
What if I spelled it "Kake?" More enticing?
What about "Kayque?" Better?
Anybody?
"Cay-Kah?"
No?
Does anyone else feel insulted when you're waiting for an elevator and have already hit the button and someone walks up and hits it again?
Sometimes, if you stand on the bottom rail of a bridge and lean over to watch the river slipping slowly away beneath you, you will suddenly know everything there is to be known ~ Winnie the Pooh
If a pine tree is in a stand and has lights on it, does it have to be a "Christmas tree" if it's only October? Can't it just be a "fun tree?"
