The concept of identity is still ill-defined to me, which may be at the core of the problem.
Text in my history last night:
"You're the only girl I know who gives hj's for revenge, call me a womanizer if you want."
"You're the only girl I know who gives hj's for revenge, call me a womanizer if you want."
So my coworkers asked me over and over if I'm gay at the company party. I guess this job is worth quitting, right?
Really complex experience. Met friends I was really close to 15 years ago. It was a blast, but something was wrong with it all. If you've ever had a sweet dream with some oddly uncomfortable vibe underlying it all, you know what I mean. I was an outsider then, I'm an outsider now. Still, I love them, and I've been waiting half a lifetime to see them again. And now it happened.
I need to burn brighter. Bright enough to reach everything. When the light spreads everywhere, encompasses everything, I can let go.
I need to burn brighter. Bright enough to reach everything. When the light spreads everywhere, encompasses everything, I can let go.
So the pool table at this bar breaks sometimes, and there are only two ways to fix it. If you have long, skinny arms (me), you can reach up into the machine and pick out the balls that are stuck. If you have large, powerful arms (this other dude), you can lift up the table at one end and tilt it.
It's important to know which arm type you fit into. If you try to lift the table up with those long, skinny arms, you may feel like you're about to slip a disc in your back within the first half second. The table will not be lifted, and people will notice. Fail.
It's important to know which arm type you fit into. If you try to lift the table up with those long, skinny arms, you may feel like you're about to slip a disc in your back within the first half second. The table will not be lifted, and people will notice. Fail.
First time hooking up with a divorcee. All sorts of complicated shit goes into that. Soooo...she cheated on her husband, but he wasn't REALLY her husband at THAT point. She has a fuck buddy in the wings...hmmm...all sorts of stuff sets the old spider sense off with this one. Everything has some sort of excuse or explanation, which is a red flag in its own right. Do I care? Really? Hmmmm tough life decisions...do I want to be mister reliable for this girl? Or am I just being used in that scenario?
On the flip side, first time someone's asked me to whack it on them. Normally I feel like I'm imposing.
On the flip side, first time someone's asked me to whack it on them. Normally I feel like I'm imposing.
MAY 2013
1
2
3
4
5
6
7
8
9
10
11
12
13
14
15
16
17
18
19
20
21
22
23
24
25
26
27
28
29
30
31
APRIL 2013
1
2
3
4
5
6
7
8
9
10
11
12
13
14
15
16
17
18
19
20
21
22
23
24
25
26
27
28
29
30
MARCH 2013
FEBRUARY 2013
1
2
3
4
5
6
7
8
9
10
11
12
13
14
15
16
17
18
19
20
21
22
23
24
25
26
27
28