Holy crap!

It's been three and a half months since I posted something.

Sorry!!

Hopefully all of you still remember who I am. Not sure why I haven't posted anything. And not reading your blog entries. The worst part is that when I don't keep up with my friends' blogs is that I fall further and further behind. Then it starts to seem overwhelming to try to catch up.

It's less than a week till Christmas, and I didn't want to leave posting something until after the holidays. I will make an effort to catch up with everyone over the next few days. I hope.

How am I doing? I'm not sure. I no longer feel blah. My psychiatrist lowered the dose of my anti-psychotic to a very low amount, and it seems to have worked, allowing me to feel emotions. Not that the emotions are always happy, but at least I'm feeling things now.

He also raised the dose of my anti-depressant. I'm now taking the highest dose of it that he's ever prescribed (though there have been a few others taking the same dose). It's one of the few anti-depressants that can be measured in a blood test, to see if I'm in the therapeutic range. Too little, and there's no effect, but too much and there's no positive effect either. But I am actually feeling occasional moments of happiness. They're short bursts, not lasting very long, but that's still better than never feeling happy.

Some of the things I enjoy doing are still not being done regularily, like reading friends' blogs. But sometimes I actually get in a good frame of mind and even do things that I HAVE to do. Like finally putting up new blinds. My blinds had suffered at the claws of previous cats, and I got a replacement set of blinds at the beginning of the year, but never got off my ass and put them up. Until last week. Yay me!

As always, I really love Christmas. It's not like I do anything exciting. I spend a few days at my mom's (and she lives just down the street), but I like giving her gifts. And we eat too much sweet and/or fatty food. Same with a few days later for New Year's Eve.

Since it's just the two of us, we haven't had a big roast turkey for many years. For several years we would have a stuffed turkey breast. This year we're having a Tofurkey. We've had it a few times this year, and figured it would be nice for Christmas day dinner. Besides, it's a lot less effort than an actual roast turkey.

And this year we're going to attempt something new. On Christmas Eve, we're going to try using Skype to talk to my brother and his wife and their son. I've never used Skype before. I installed it on my mom's computer, and it looks simple enough. But it'll be a new experience to talk by webcam.

There are a few more things I could prattle on about, but I'm going to leave them for next year, after I've caught up with everybody.

Merry Christmas!! Happy New Year!!