I've had three new video blogs since the last one I posted here nearly a year ago. The thing is, even now they're all super old. Enjoy.

Wow, I haven't updated in forever! My girlfriend and I were outed at work but it's cool. Our boss was shockingly okay with it. And the bitch that outed us threatened to punch my boss after she quit, so she is banned from the store! Woohoo!

Last night my girlfriend gave me a blowjob while we were watching The Monster Squad. I'm pretty sure that's the first time that's happened to anyone ever. I think I love this girl.

My computer is on the fritz. Need my folks to help me replace it. Typing on my phone with my thumbs. Just not the same.

Whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

About a week before I found out that the girl I've been moping about was seeing someone behind my back, I started writing a story about a guy who gets dumped by his girlfriend and finds out she was seeing someone behind his back. Sometimes life imitates art. I've continued writing the story and I think it's one of the better things I've ever written. It's pretty funny too. My favorite line so far:

‎"I thought I heard some shouting last night too. You sure everything is okay?"
Things were about to get uncomfortable. Fortunately, Carl opened the door wearing nothing but a pair of black tighty-whiteys and a sleepy expression.

Tried to extend the old olive branch, it was thrown in my face. Honestly, that hurt and I'm more than a bit pissed. I think it was finally enough to get me to a point where I can really begin to let go of the way I've felt for her all this time. Honestly, some people just aren't worth a mouse fart in a ten-gallon hat. Needless to say she and I will no longer be speaking which is her loss, really.

So, let's all move on, shall we?