Hmm. Well I had a good weekend
Friday the boys I nanny for and I went to the zoo and saw cute animals. And then me and Wes the nine year old drew and i made this pretty firetruck

Then I went to spend the weekend with Omeganightmare and his roomies (toez and hubby). We had a fantastic time.
I brought brownies I made



I improved my Rockband playin skills and drank really yummy passion fruit vodka. Toez, shes a cool chick. On Sunday Omega and I watched Hitch Hikers Guide to the Galaxy, and it was my first time watching it; I give it an A.
I was very sad to leave and come back home to my shit job that I don't get paid enough to do. I was happy to see the B-Boy but I wasn't in the best mood today and I know my care giving wasn't quite up to par and then i felt bad.

Also, for some odd reason I actually decided to call my credit card company since I hadn't payed them.. and ya, no bueno. I had to pay today so I am poor but i got some of my late fees taken off and what not *sigh*.
I hate that money is such an issue in life.

Well I believe I will be going to be seeing Omega again next weekend


Its something nice to look forward to.

Ive been thinkin bunches lately and the thought of marriage has really been bugging me as of late. I have always wanted to get married, that has been one childhood dream that I never thought would change. Now I no longer know how I feel bout marriage or the human races ability to be faithful. With the divorce rate being in the 50 percentile and so many seemingly unhappy people I just don't get it. All it really seems to do is cost money.

"No I won't take your hand and marry the state!"

I just need to find someone that, while we will have differences (in many areas), I can love them right through them and vice versa. I want to see all your flaws and still be in love with you.
I don't have to like all your music, or the way you do your hair, your family will be different than mine and I don't care if we dress the same. Maybe you'll be forgetful, but you'll remember the important things. And when we fight I'll still tell you I love you. I'll go to church and maybe you wont, but you'll respect me enough not to criticize me for it.

I know I can do it, I just don't know that there will ever been someone who can be that for me.
Further more, since my last relationship I have the hardest time discerning whether or not I REALLY know someone. How is it that you know?

"With so many people in the world, why are we still alone?"
Sometimes I guess I am just so blind.

Alex had an interesting blog... I think its bout me. =/ I love him to death, but we're done. I think he may be realizing i'm never coming back to him. December 13th will be one year since i left him... man does time fly.

I miss home. I wish I had the money to visit... Id love to see Alex and the family, and Gir my puppy dog and Richard but who knows when that will be.
I am trying to be content, but the plain fact is that I am not. Nonetheless this is still the best I have felt about myself and life in a long time. I just know that I could be doing so much more... life has the potential to be beautiful.