My friends Father's memorial serves was today....

I couldn't stay it made me so emotional and worried....

I'm okay now but Oh man was it tough.

I'm extremely glad to have today off.

I work everyday this week though besides today... I hate how much I have to be there. If the pay was better I wouldn't mind. But oh well....

I'm not in the best of moods so I'll just be getting off here and hope fully i'll have something better tomorrow.

I'm going to be okay...

Went to the doctor and I was having abdominal bleeding caused by me migraine medication and 2 erupted stomach ulcers.

Also the other medication I've been taking for me low white cell count and my migraine medication could have caused seizers. So thank God I got checked out. He said if I would have kept going I could of ended up in a seriously bad condition.

So I'm excited but Im going back for more tests just to cross our t's and dot our i's.

Other then that my weekend is going to be a drag because I work doubles on both Saturday and Sunday...blah. My work is so short handed it isn't even funny any more. I don't have anyone to cover me if I need a day off or a night off for that matter.... *sigh* I need a new job... but first things first and thats my health.

Today has been a little much....

I typing this in my down time between shifts at work....blah I start at 5 again..

Work has been hectic. We keep getting short handed.... which means more work for me. Being sick and all its ten times harder

Also last night my best friend Clint's father passed away....

I really feels like my world is falling apart....

Now because of all this bad news happening around me I'm going to see a doctor tomorrow... so I'll update and let everyone know what's going on.... I just pray its not serious.

mmmmmmmkay

I have to work tonight at 5... not looking forward to it. I haven't been to work since Friday night.... I've been extremely sick and even at that concert I missed a lot of it because I was coughing up blood in the restroom.

I'm getting really good at appearing to be okay and happy... it hurts inside though. It feels like I'm lying to people.
I just want to get better. I don't know anymore... when it feels like I'm getting better I'm not... damn...

Thanks to everyone who commented before.

I'm still sick but in my opinion slowly getting better.

I went to the 3 Floors of Ska show last night. It was amazing. started at 6 and it didn't end till midnight. I had a blast. I got so see this boy I've been oogling over for the past few months. He's in one of the bands that played and he's a friend of mine. he he

Saw other friends that are in bands to which was exciting.

Missed work yesterday and today....
things have just been rough lately and I wish things would go back to the way they were.

I had a rough day yesterday
Someone I was friends with in high school past way at 2:55 am on Wednesday morning.
He flipped is car and was ejected out of it.
He was my ex fiancé's best friend. It's ripping my ex apart. Him and I are really close friends so I'm just trying to be there for him. At the same time me being as sick as I am isn't helping him. He's seriously worried about losing me and its scaring me.

On a brighter note... Happy Thanksgiving everyone.
I hope you all are having/had a great time.

Today hasn't been that entertaining. I've been reading "Why we suck" by Dr. Denis Leary. It's great. I love Denis Leary.

Had court this morning.
Not for my stolen ATM card. It was for my ticket I got for driving on my suspended license.

It went well. It was way better then I thought it was going to be. I do however have to go back in February with my license... Which i should have by then. I'm hopping things get better for me from here on out.

Before I went to court I stopped at the police station to view the ATM tape and the bank tape. Sadly you can not see the persons face. But I have a good feeling I know who did it and I still going to try my hardest to get them. My bank will not refund my money (even though it is not me on the tapes.) because my pin wasn't protected.
I never give my pin number out. It's the dumbest thing you could do.

I'm hopping today continues to stay good. I hope the rest of the week keeps up.

I can't wait till saturday. I'm going to 3 Floors of Sak in Chicago. I'll be surrounded by tons of fun people that i can actually trust. I'm so excited.

Thanks for everyones concern about me being sick. *hugs*
Sadly I am not fully better yet. Not as much blood though so that is a total plus. I don't feel as shitty as I did either.


Plus for the day.... new House is on and I get to watch it since I don't have to work at all today.

Alrighty....

Work was a total drag.... but busy and since I'm ill it sucked.

On a brighter side I'm not coughing up as much blood.

Plus the Bears won. Which is awesome as always.

I'm just sitting around watching House on usa ... all of which I've seen. I just love the show so much. I never been so into a t.v. show like this.

This up coming week is going to be odd. I'm so worried about court on Tuesday. But the weekend does bring 3 Floors of Ska... and I can't wait for that show.

I really do hope things get better soon...

Today was pretty bad...

work was slow...

I opened a new bank account.

I am extremely sick and I can not seek medical help since I do not have the money or the insurance. But I've been coughing up blood for the past 10 hours or so... I've been sick for the past month but just flew like....so I'm hopping that its just over coughing or I scratched my throat...idk... I'm just hopping its not serious.

I did try to paint... started off good but I feel horrible so stopped.

Hopefully tomorrow is a better day...

(I started typing this up at 11:45p.m. on November 20th...)


Today just sucked....

So last night when I got off here I went to try to draw and .... nothing.... but a lot of bothersome things have happened.... I wont get into it. So I told myself...'I'll try tomorrow' (meaning today) Totally not remembering that I work a double. So all artistic time got shot out the window for today.

So I went to work and it was a total drag.... we did pick up and got a little busy for my last hour and a half.
Then I had an hour in a half in between shifts so I ran with my mother and got coffee.... love it.

Also about a half hour into my first shift my phone company shut off my phone without informing me so I had to ask my mother to pay it since my account was cleaned out by whom ever took my ATM card and I told her I'd pay her tomorrow since it is payday.... Then the phone should be all up and running in a max. 2 hours after paying it and it wasn't. She paid it at 1 p.m. and then at about 3 maybe 4ish I was able to only receive calls and text... I wasn't able to send or make calls till 10:30 p.m. he detective called and everything and I couldn't even call him back or anything. That stuff is important.

Anyway.... Went back to work for my second half.... totally slow... and with my phone not working (even thought I shouldn't be on it) I had nothing to do. I was doing extra things and trying to keep my mind off of shit.. . . Didn't really work at all and the time went by so slowly. About 45 minutes till I had to leave my headache got worse. My vision got worse. My eyes welded up with tears. I just stood in the back by shelves with my head in my arms for a good 20 minutes till I could tolerate it.

Got home and just have been trying to relax and chill out.... I really hope some drawing will get done tomorrow... I really need to.