I don't know if I have ever mentioned, but I am a photographer.

You should take a peek at my work... let me know your thoughts.

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Well, someone reactivated this here thing of mine.

So, here I am.

But, most important -- who gone and done it? I'd like to know, but perhaps the not-knowing makes it all the more interesting.

To bring it all back around... it's so funny what a year does.

I have decided to cancel my account for an indefinite amount of time... trying to cut back on my little expenses here and there and I cannot rationalize paying for this site at the moment.

My journal will deactivate on the 19th of the month, so you still have some time to say your goodbyes. I am not sure when or if I will be back.

If you still want to follow me about, I have a Twitter (sleudr), Tumblr (shabooh), and photo blog (http://ericamckeehen.blogspot.com) that I update regularly.

Also, you search for me on Facebook... America McKeehen is my name. But shh about that one.

I haven’t updated in some time. This is no good. But my life has been busy and filled with love and adventure. This is good. Chicago is long gone as of the first of the month. My life is filled with social activity and music once again. I spent last weekend in Charles’s hometown, which means I got to meet his parents and stay in his house. His mother babied and pampered me, and his father talked politics with me. Now I have completed my first week as a senior in college. The boobhouse is lovely and my cool blue bedroom is a haven of decoration and delight. Everything is neat and tidy and homey. Classes are overwhelming, as they will be, but I am excited about my photo ideas. I feel inspired and supported. Life is tangy sweet.

Tonight is my last night in Chicago.

I have only been here two months… granted, that isn’t really enough time to make a proper evaluation of the city. But, I do love Chicago. It is a big city with humble accents. I needed that humbleness. After all, I am just a small-town girl who talks a big game but, in the end, is rather easily amused.

I didn’t love living alone in a room-sized apartment in a rich neighborhood with a mean Russian doorwoman. I didn’t love getting emotional and having needless arguments with my loved on via telephone and internet correspondence. I didn’t love being broke nearly the entire time I was here. I didn’t love sleeping thirteen hours a day with little motivation to leave my room. In the end, it is difficult to be alone. I suppose there is comfort in solitude… but to a certain degree. I am stronger for having lived through this experience and no doubt I am a richer person for it. But that doesn’t mean that at the end of the day, I felt sad, lonely, and homesick, for the first real time in my life.

Though I wish my internship would’ve gone on another month, I am thankful to be leaving the city at a time when I have $4 to my name and am living off of toast and spaghetti.

But there are some other things.

I am thankful that Andrew was here for the latter half of the summer to be my much-needed buddy/moral support. I am thankful that Carrie was able to visit for a few days last week following her return from France. I am thankful that my high school chum Kevin randomly made his way here to spend a weekend with me. I am thankful that Charles was with me, in one way or the other, through the thick and thin of my trials and tribulations to remind me that it wasn’t all so bad. I am thankful that I worked with a wonderfully down-to-earth, fun, and insightful photographer, even if we weren’t as busy as we’d like to have been throughout the course of my internship. I am thankful that she liked cool music, took me out to lunch every day, bought me coffee, and opened up her personal life, including her family, to me — a complete stranger 13 years her minor. I am thankful that I was given the opportunity (and the grant… thanks OU!) to come here and venture outside of my comfort zone. I am thankful that I now have a much more realistic approach to not only a future in this business, but a future in the city.

Even still, I leave Chicago with emotions strung in every which way.

I guess, in the pattern of all things me, I wouldn’t have it any other way.

Like so many others, I fear that I have fallen out of touch with this web site.

It is irritating to go through and recall everything that I've written here. And all the lame-o photographs I've posted of myself. That probably has a lot to do with the fact that I began journaling here when I was 17. In a week, I will be 22. There is a bounty of pain and drama and sadness and randomness and ego all over this profile, and most of it makes me uncomfortable. Some of it makes me proud.

I've enjoyed the friends I've made and the sort of "culture" of everything, but the time is approaching when I must either choose to renew my membership or give it the ol' heave-ho. My funds are tight, so the latter is looking more appealing to me at the moment.

If I do decide to stay, it might be solely for the few girls that I still admire and the wonderful photography that debuts every day. I guess you could say this site provides a convenient source of inspiration for me.

I will let you know either way. "You" being the extremely diminished readership that I still maintain.

As previously advertised, I do have a more focused outlet for my thoughts and creations housed here. I encourage you to stay in touch if you so desire. I also have Tumblr, Twitter, and all that nonsense.

As always, thanks for listening.

I had a flawless day yesterday, in retrospect. I'd like to share the details of it with you all.

To start, Charles and I had a nice going-away breakfast at Bob Evans with his friend Ryan, who is interning at The Virginian-Pilot, and I had three different beverages.

My parents drove down to Athens to help me move. I was worried that they would complain a lot about the drive, or how they were tired, or how they didn't want to stay long, etc. No. They were actually a big help. (Even my mom, who can barely lift a toilet plunger without acting as though she's overexerted herself.) We managed to get everything moved over to the house and situated in very little time. My dad assembled my new desk and dresser for me, and Charles put together my coffee table. They drank beer and bonded over Paul Simon. Everyone loved Emily's kitty Cali, which is sort of my new kitty, too. I invited Carrie over and my parents, Carrie, Charles, and I all had a nice Subway dinner on my new patio. My dad wanted to stay a little longer to relax, so we had some more nice patio times. He really liked Emily. My mom started to get a little grumpy toward the end of the night, but by the time she was safely in the car to go back home, she was content.

After my parents left, I worked on my room for about three hours and got everything cleaned and put away. I have everything I need except curtains and a bed... and the latter is coming shortly. My room is beautiful, and I love my new house and, of course, my new housemates, Carrie and Emily. I am so happy to be leaving the cement walls of apartment living. Granted, I have lived in a very nice apartment for the past year, but it is so liberating to have more room, an animal friend, and, ah, a yard. We even have a garden!

Finally, it was so lovely to have my parents visit me. I have been asking them to visit since freshman year, and they never have. It has been a painful and frustrating tug and pull for the past three years. I am just grateful that they finally gave me their time... I know that I am a loved child, but sometimes, I just need to be shown that love.

I am out of hiding.

The quarter is winding down.

After a week and two days of dysfunction, I have my Mac back.

I am 35-40% done with my term paper for Collective Social Movements.

I have one assignment and my final left for Philosophy of Art.

I just finished editing my final series for Portraiture. I have a written final next Thursday.

Soul of Athens project = done. Go to www.soulofathens.com and view the project entitled Small But Mighty.

I have to memorize the following songs for History of Rock II:

I'm Eighteen - Alice Cooper
Indodo Yejazi Elimnyama - Amaswazi Emvelo
Master of Puppets - Apocalyptica
Banned in D.C. - Bad Brains
No Sleep 'Til Brooklyn - Beastie Boys
Stayin' Alive - The Bee Gees
Iron Man - Black Sabbath
Iron Man - The Cardigans
I Shot the Sheriff - Bob Marley
King Junco Partner - The Clash
Jocko Homo - Devo
I Feel Love - Donna Summer
Alison - Elvis Costello
Tarkus - Emerson, Lake & Palmer
Hands Off She's Mine - English Beat
Death Metal - Exhume
On Reflection - Gentle Giant
I Want Your Sex - George Michael
Rainbow Voice - The Harmonic Choir and David Hykes
Hey Mister, That's Me Up On The Jukebox - James Taylor
Amelia - Joni Mitchell
Hell Bent for Leather - Judas Priest
The Immortal Dub - King Tubby
Trans Europe Express - Kraftwerk
Justify My Love - Madonna
Celestial Terrestrial Commuters - Mahavishnu Orchestra
Soul Makossa - Manu Dibango
Ace of Spades - Motorhead
After the Gold Rush - Neil Young
Personality Crisis - New York Dolls
Horses - Patti Smith
American Tune - Paul Simon
Spirits in the Material World - The Police
Blackhead Chineyman - Prince Buster
Now I Wanna Sniff Some Glue - The Ramones
Rednecks - Randy Newman
God Save the Queen - Sex Pistols
Ghost Town - The Specials
1969 - The Stooges
Once in a Lifetime - Talking Heads
Marquee Moon - Television
Talkin' Bout a Revolution - Tracy Chapman
Two-Part Invention in F Major - Wendy Carlos
Johnny Hit and Run Pauline - X

I am going home this weekend for Shannon's 24th birthday.

I move into my new home on the 15th of June.

I move into my temporary Chicago home the 30th of June.

I self-destruct in 5, 4, 3, 2�

Poof.

I am happy as a clam.

I have been granted $4,000 to go to Chicago for a summer photography internship.

I have met so many beautiful, talented people. Go here.

The sun is shining.

My hair is growing out.

U2's music is just as glorious as ever. And there's a new Depeche Mode album out on the 21st.

Coachella and California in 8 days.

I have been photographing more/paying attention more. Go here.

Another quarter down. Well, I have a photo critique Wednesday at noon, but I don't count that as a final, really.

So, yeah. This quarter flew by, and I feel like I say that at the end of every quarter, but really. I feel like it's all been pretty ridiculous. In a year and a quarter, I will be all gradumacated. And that is extremely frightening.

Related to growing up and entering the real world, I am going on a mini-trip to Chicago with Joel next week, and hopefully I will be able to meet a few of the photographers with whom I've been corresponding regarding internships and the like. Here's one and here's one and here's one. And here's my portfolio website that I have been refining in bits and pieces all quarter, along with my resume, which is also located on the site. My project for the first few days of spring break is to experiment with these things to get them in peak form.

And while I'm on the topic of photo.

In the end, my still life photography class wasn't too shabby. I wish I would've executed a little more creativity with some of the assignments, but overall, I'm just happy to be done with it for this year.

This is my schedule for next quarter... not that any of you really care, but I'll just pretend you all go to my college (and thus care in some minute form).

SOC 414 Collective Social Movements
MUS 224 History of Rock Music II
VICO 324 Portraiture
VICO 469 Soul of Athens website
PHIL 332 Philosophy of Art (on-line)

I am pretty pumped. The Soul of Athens class is interactive multimedia project involving all students and faculty in the School of Visual Communication. It is a pretty prestigious project that has received numerous web awards amongst the likes of the New York Times and such. Check it out.

My roommates both left for spring break today, so I have the apartment to myself for a few days before heading home to visit my family for the weekend. I am celebrating the solitude by sitting on the couch, completely naked, listening to the Rolling Stones (a little uncharacteristic of me, but my History of Rock class has really influenced my tuneage these past few months), and drinking this yummy pomegranate tea over ice. The night is young, my friends.

My chumlette Jessica from high school is visiting me tomorrow/later today with her girlfriend, and we are going to "go out" and "rage" for St. Patrick's Day. I am not a big drinker by any stretch of the imagination, but it feels nice to be able to go out and have fun on the holiday with friends. Plus I have a killer green dress to wear.

Speaking of drinking, here are some entertaining pictures from a wine party I attended on Valentine's Day at my friend Peter's house... one of the odd little highlights of my winter quarter. I have only been legitimately drunk... *counts...* three or four times, I think. This night was definitely one of those times.







Consequently, my hair no longer looks like that. Wouldn'tyaknowit.

I have been uber inspired and positive-minded, for the most part, for the past two weeks thanks to U2 and their new album. Listening to U2 so much lately has allowed me to feel so much more connected. It is some of the most beautiful music in the world... and please disregard the new single as representative of the rest of the new album. There is some beautiful music on the new album that is worth your time and attention. Personally, I've revisited the entire U2 discography several times over in the past 17 days, and it has been so rewarding. I'm constantly reminded why I started listening to this band over 11 years ago.

And, you know, while I'm talking out of my ass here -- fuck everyone who says that U2 has grown stale, has "let us down" with their recent work, or has sold-out by playing with catchier, funkier, and, yes (grits teeth), "commercial" songs as debut singles. Listen, U2 has produced some of the most influential music of the past 30 years. They are one of the last truly phenomenal live bands (you honestly cannot argue otherwise unless you've seen them). They have inspired millions, reinvented their sound while exploring new musical territory many times, and lead extremely successful careers. They don't have anything left to prove. Simply put, they've already done it.

Realize that they are human beings -- they've aged, they've changed, and comparing their new work to albums like the The Joshua Tree and Achtung Baby (while simultaneously claiming that anything that they've produced since 1991 has not "lived up to" these albums) is a useless argument. No, they cannot revisit those times in their career, and we shouldn't want them to. Music is all about evolving and the trial and error that coincides. It is also about creative freedom and exploration. You know, the last time I checked, Paul McCartney isn't going to ressurect John Lennon and write another White Album. That doesn't render everything he has done in the past few decades subpar, useless, et cetera, et cetera...

Calm down and stop acting like you're too fucking cool to listen to an alternative rock band that's been around longer than 15 years that ISN'T Radiohead (not that that's a diss, of course I love them as well, but you get my point). And while you're at it, realize that, whether or not you like Bono, I really couldn't care, and neither could he. You need to give the man respect for using the spotlight to advocate change in which he is adamantly active in achieving through his countless efforts. Maybe it's annoying that he's always in the news, but he is using the publicity to DO GOOD. Look up the actual numbers -- money that he has helped raise for various humanitarian campaigns, debt that he has helped eradicate from poverty-stricken nations... Can you really criticize that and wholeheartedly mean it? Seems a little, I don't know, fucking heartless and ignorant to "hate" a man who has, since the 1980s, acted on his compassion. What the fuck are you doing with your time and money?

OK. I really didn't need to go there, but I did, so, sigh, there it is. My love and loyalty are obvious. I'm sure you are mildly to severely annoyed, and that's okay.

Now it's time for bed.