I feel like throwing up as I write this, so go me. I've been applying to grad schools over the past few days, and the only thing I can't control is, of course, my letters of reference. I had lined up three professors who agreed to give me referrals, but I haven't heard from two of them in at least a month and the only one I have heard from just let me know that he's no longer going to write me one.

Did I mention that 8 of my 14 schools' deadlines are in January? And that 11 of those 14 require 3 letters of reference?

I don't know whether I should feel sick or unbelievably pissed off. This isn't like losing a damn sports game or anything, this is my life.

I just sent an e-mail to my senior year of high school English teacher, asking him to be a reference. He would give me a glowing letter, but I don't know how a high school teacher's approval will be received by officials from an MFA program. If that doesn't work, well... I need to think of something.

I really want to just be pissed and/or feel sorry for myself right now, but I don't have time for that. I need to think of something fast.

I swear to God, if I don't get into a single grad school because of this....