You know what sucks?
Waking up every day and realizing that everyone else on the face of the planet is so much fucking better than you.
And no, you don't know that.
But I do.
You know that statement of "don't be cocky because there's always someone else out there that's better than you"?
I'm the starting point.
Do the math.
Waking up every day and realizing that everyone else on the face of the planet is so much fucking better than you.
And no, you don't know that.
But I do.
You know that statement of "don't be cocky because there's always someone else out there that's better than you"?
I'm the starting point.
Do the math.
Well, here's my journal update.
Had a lot of sex last week.
Got my marks back from college, and I failed this semester, which means I'm no longer in college. I hate doing databases, and I hate visual basic as a programming language. i always have, and apparently, i always will. They have been the largest thorns in my side since the dawn of time ... or at least the dawn of their times combined with my time ...
So now I'm totally lost ... I have no idea what to do with my life and I feel as tho I've been totally cast adrift in life again ... it took so much work to get myself to be able to go to college in the first place and now it turns out that I'm simply not smart enough in two areas to continue onto the rest of the years where I would have easily dominated my class in hardware, networking and web skills.
So what do i do now?
My talents (?) ... writing, screaming, telephone technical supporting (if that even is a talent), being self destructive, giving oral sex, fixing computers, modifying computer towers, making computer systems run clean and fast ...
Wow ... <sarcasm>i sure am worthwhile</sarcasm>
I hate me ... and I have no one else to turn to
Great
Had a lot of sex last week.
Got my marks back from college, and I failed this semester, which means I'm no longer in college. I hate doing databases, and I hate visual basic as a programming language. i always have, and apparently, i always will. They have been the largest thorns in my side since the dawn of time ... or at least the dawn of their times combined with my time ...
So now I'm totally lost ... I have no idea what to do with my life and I feel as tho I've been totally cast adrift in life again ... it took so much work to get myself to be able to go to college in the first place and now it turns out that I'm simply not smart enough in two areas to continue onto the rest of the years where I would have easily dominated my class in hardware, networking and web skills.
So what do i do now?
My talents (?) ... writing, screaming, telephone technical supporting (if that even is a talent), being self destructive, giving oral sex, fixing computers, modifying computer towers, making computer systems run clean and fast ...
Wow ... <sarcasm>i sure am worthwhile</sarcasm>
I hate me ... and I have no one else to turn to
Great
Annnnnnnd the LAN party is officially over..
That only took .... uhm.... lesse... it started friday... today is tuesday...
Yea...
Jolt is amazing.
My friends feared Meshuggah and S.Y.L. coming over my speakers because they knew that my kill total would suddenly skyrocket.
I cannot emphasyze just how amusing it is to see 4 people running at you and then suddenly running away from you when they hear "New Millenium Cyanide Christ" suddenly pump through a subwoofer and I hop into a tank.
Did I mention that Jolt is refreshing?
Anyways, since my webcam is finally working, I may actually start posting up a pic or two here ... if anyone is actually interested in seeing me without hair (as opposed to that pic up here that's from early december) let me know and I'll update... otherwise why bother?
That only took .... uhm.... lesse... it started friday... today is tuesday...
Yea...
Jolt is amazing.
My friends feared Meshuggah and S.Y.L. coming over my speakers because they knew that my kill total would suddenly skyrocket.
I cannot emphasyze just how amusing it is to see 4 people running at you and then suddenly running away from you when they hear "New Millenium Cyanide Christ" suddenly pump through a subwoofer and I hop into a tank.
Did I mention that Jolt is refreshing?
Anyways, since my webcam is finally working, I may actually start posting up a pic or two here ... if anyone is actually interested in seeing me without hair (as opposed to that pic up here that's from early december) let me know and I'll update... otherwise why bother?
Today the week of death begins.
This is also known as finals.
It's going to be hell for me because I have the chance of a snowball in the shape of a snail making it through hells desert.
Or that someone would actually have low enough standards to think I'm hot.
But I digress..
It's not nice to fool mother theresa ... especally when she's making a high school movie that's based around that teen sex/slasher/slapstick romp...
Where was I? Oh yea ... no nerves at all. I'm completely calm and sane about this exam. No one bouncing in their seats nervously over here. Noooooooooooope.
I'M ALL HARDCORE AND YOU CAN'T PROVE OTHERWISE!!!!!
This is also known as finals.
It's going to be hell for me because I have the chance of a snowball in the shape of a snail making it through hells desert.
Or that someone would actually have low enough standards to think I'm hot.
But I digress..
It's not nice to fool mother theresa ... especally when she's making a high school movie that's based around that teen sex/slasher/slapstick romp...
Where was I? Oh yea ... no nerves at all. I'm completely calm and sane about this exam. No one bouncing in their seats nervously over here. Noooooooooooope.
I'M ALL HARDCORE AND YOU CAN'T PROVE OTHERWISE!!!!!
Two weeks left to go until school is done..
I really enjoyed my time there, but I don't think I'm going to move back to Brantford.
I've started looking for work as of today.
I may not get my degree, but I've still got my certifications and it shouldn't be disgustingly hard to find a job at an entry level in Toronto for computers.
I really enjoyed my time there, but I don't think I'm going to move back to Brantford.
I've started looking for work as of today.
I may not get my degree, but I've still got my certifications and it shouldn't be disgustingly hard to find a job at an entry level in Toronto for computers.
My life sucks.
I'm not going to pass my important classes. I'm fucked. The dream is over.
What in the fucking hell do I do now??
I'm not going to pass my important classes. I'm fucked. The dream is over.
What in the fucking hell do I do now??

