To beautiful people who moan and bitch and complain about their lives: Try being me for a while. Try and have all the same human difficulties, the same trials and tribulations, the same uphill battle that being human is, except that you're ugly. Life is easier when people give you things just for being you...
I tried to e-file my tax return today. It turns out that someone stole my SSN and filed a fraudulent return using my information. I'm beyond enraged. If I had what I wanted right now it would be a very short list that would go something like this: The meth-addict/child-fucker who stole my SSN, one of those clear plastic raincoats, duct tape, some of my favorite knives, goggles and one of those cheap self-storage units for a day. Oh, and fuck the IRS and TurboTax.
Yeah. I need to make good on that promise I made to start drinking more. Oh, and hyenas are awesome...
Conan the barbarian (the new one) is the worst movie ever made. Seriously, do not even try to watch this movie. Just trying to watch it makes you a much worse person than you actually are. The studio execs responsible for this should be submerged in a vat full of bullet ants while they watch their loved ones waterboarded with raw sewage. Wow. I think I need a shower...
