Wow, it's been awhile.

Sorry, I haven't been too active. I'd like to say I've had a lot going on, but that's not really true. I've just been kinda lazy about things, haha. Work is just as stressful as ever, I've moved to a new department to try and diversify my background, which equates to a lot of babysitting and breaking up childish nitpicking. Fun (right?), but I suppose it's to further my career.

The lone highlight of the past few months was my trip to Wizard Word Chicago with the most lovey Churtch. The third year I've gone with her, and it's a blast every time! Got to meet a few members as well as the other awesome SGs as well!


From a personal standpoint, I STILL have no fucking idea what's going on. Too much to express in any coherent manner. Isn't that lovely. True happiness seems to always elude me, as it does so many.

Anyway, in my custom of including music in each blog... I watched "Cabin in the Woods" tonight for the second time and I highly recommend it. The credits are set to a rather stellar Nine Inch Nails song which is quite suiting to the film.


Until another day...

Hello everyone! Hope all is well. The Meshuggah show last week was fucking amazing!

First of, I will refrain from personal feelings here because it's really the same old shit, and no one wants to hear that.

The last few days I've rescinded to my German musical tastes.

Rammstein, everyone's first thought in this category. Still need to see these guys live. I know it's an epic show. Fire ftw.


Next is Oomph! A group I've been exposed to since high school, but not too many have known of... They're highly talented, but probably overshadowed by Rammstein on the american front.



Last is Knorkator. These guys are crazy. Talented, but they just don't give a fuck. They're catchy and hilarious. This song is all about a new letter of the alphabet, and it's "". Haha!


MORE IMPORTANTLY... This Saturday. The beyond amazing Churtch is hosting an epic semi-formal here in Ames, IA. You should all be here if you know what's good for you! It will be incredible! I would really like to meet you all!


Until another time...

The day is finally here. One of my most anticipated shows of the past year has finally arrived. Tonight I'll have the great pleasure of seeing Meshuggah live in Minneapolis. They're easily my favorite band and to this date the best live show I've ever seen.



Also playing are The Baroness and Decapitated.




Hopefully the epic show will suit to take my mind off of latest progression of life. I'm back to the personally "plagued" feeling. Seems every chance I take is met with derision and damage. In short, I just can't seem to catch a break. I truly can't remember the last time something of note has trended to my favor.

Anyway, hope you are all well and living it up. Until another time...

Oh hai! What's up SG friends?

I realize that I've not been terribly active here, but I hope that will change before too long.

I've been to so many great metal shows lately! I consider it a personal reassurance that live music is still alive if you will. I'm not terribly critical of other's taste in music, but I relish the chance to convert some of the open minded to my cause. So here are some of the highlights of what I've experienced throughout the past month or so.







Also another epic show (Meshuggah & Baroness) next weekend.

The new status at work seems to be going well, although there are times that I feel more like a babysitter than a production coordinator. Could be worse.

On a personal life sense, pessimism seems to be winning out yet again. Damn, it really doesn't pay to be right about shit most of the time. I relish the day when someone can truly convince me of the cohesive virtues of optimism.

Summer if fast approaching, maybe that will facilitate a change.

Until another day...

Hello again friends!

The weather's getting warmer here and that means I get to actually spend some time outside. Many motorcycle rides and rounds of golf are in the near future! Yes... I play golf, don't hate.

Coming changes at work should be interesting. Tomorrow I start to oversee a new line, a strange feeling, as I've been on my current one for 4+ years. It will be nice to learn some new things for a change, and I look forward to the new challenge of whipping a group of undisciplined workers into a productive machine.

Personally, I almost hate to say it, things may be looking up. I'll be cautious for now, because it seems like forever since things have gone right. Here's hoping...

I'm getting back into one of my favorite old habits, going to shows! I'm leaving in the 20 mins to go see Nile and Black Dahlia Murder in St. Paul!



Should be a good time, despite some foreboding drama that may ensue due the the unfortunate location.

Also, I have at least 5 more shows to go to in the next 2 months! Should be a good start.

That's all for now, until the next time.

Oh hai. Me again. Life progresses, and I guess so do the blogs.

First, the professional. Previously I'd mentioned applying for an advancement at my current job, unfortunately, that progression will not happen. A few factors contributed to this, but I still hold myself highly responsible. Point is, it's not happening now, but "maybe someday". Ha. Anyway...

Second, more progression on my Dark Tower sleeve. I think this latest session was the longest I've ever sat for, ironic because it is one of the smallest, psychically.

Forgive the poor photo quality, I hope better pictures are forthcoming. I'm still quite happy with it.

More.. On a personal sense, I have no fucking idea what's going on. Confidence has been a problem for me before, and this failure in the job dept doesn't exactly help. When people say I'm a pessimist, I say I'm a realist, but lately I'm not so sure I see a distinction. How long can things go wrong before one feels plagued? Karma is laughable at this point. I'm not greedy, I just want someone to give me a chance, to care. Odd, that one thing that's given me strength, music, can also be an incredibly alienating attribute. I fear that finding someone that understands (or at least tolerates) me is made exponentially difficult by my taste in music. Exhausting.

So I present you with three videos that are very different from each other, but mean a lot to me. Keep an open mind, and try to enjoy.

"Be the broken or the breaker, be the giver or the undertaker."


"But I will never find what I am looking for, I couldn't give a damn cause what I want is even more than your blood shot eyes."


"What solace lies in the arms of fate, the ill embrace of uncertainty..."


Until another time...

So, yes, it's the holidays. I'm glad this is a happy time for most. Personally I view them as just normal days, especially after many previous jobs in retail. Luckily with my current job we get a nice chunk of paid holiday time and don't have to deal with people, at least from a customer service standpoint.

There's not too much new exciting news lately, sometimes I feel like I'm the most boring person in the world.

More progress on my Dark Tower sleeve. I'm continually happy with the work!


Christmas was fairly routine. Some amount of time spent with family, then back for some good time with friends. I don't usually profess about presents, but I did get a sweet Batman shirt and some super comfy pillows from Churtch and her daughter. Thanks, you are both increasingly amazing.

Work's pretty standard, not much has changed there for a long time. I did apply for a new position, Facilitator, which would merit me a substantial pay raise, but in my mind it's kind of a long shot. The new position would be much more of a white collar job, as opposed to the blue collar assembly work I do now. I would definitely look quite a bit different than any other person that's had that position before. It may be my first exposure to the stereotype of applying for a job with highly visible piercings and tattoos. I haven't written a real resume or interviewed for anything it at least 7 years, so I am curious (and a little nervous), to see how this goes.

As far as the new year, I don't really have much to say. I don't really make resolutions, it seems in the back of my mind there's always a notion of self improvement, which hasn't been fulfilled, ever. Will the world (as we know it) end in 2012?

Movies are something I am looking forward to for 2012.
For obvious reasons:


This one has also piqued my interest. It should be closely related to the "Alien" series in some way. The inclusion of the Space Jockey is quite an indicator. Looks to be epic.



As always, a bit of the dark that is my mind. I don't mean to complain about things, but in some ways I wish that any sort of venting will somehow help makes things better. Depression is something I wish I could get accustomed to, so I could ignore it. My deficiencies of a romantic sense weigh too heavily most days. Any attempts made to rectify this seem to only be met with lies, callousness, and disillusion. Cold and loneliness fit in the same categories as sleep (or lack thereof), work, and food these days because they are just as much a part of my life. Damn if I just wish my heart was good for something besides being smashed and broken.

So, I guess closing with music videos is my succinct way for saying, "thanks for reading the drivel!"

Two videos from one of my favorite song writers, Devin Townsend. Also, The drummer for SYL, Gene Hoglan (the Atomic Clock), is great. He's also the RL drummer in Dethklok for you Metalocalypse fans. The first video is a nice Evil Dead homage too. Enjoy.



Until next time...

Hello friends, I'm here, and yet I fear it's the same old story...

Work has been the busiest ever lately, and me being the responsible SOB I am, I participate in all the overtime glory. YAY. Which means I haven't accomplished much in the way of actual life lately.

Particular newness... I've finally started on my Dark Tower sleeve, which has been in subtle conception for some time. I'm quite happy with the start, hopefully it's an indication of how well the rest will go.


I had a normal Thanksgiving lunch with the family, then another fun event (mini SGIA gathering) at Churtch's place. I really appreciate the fact that she includes me in such things. It was quite a bit of fun as slider1975 could probably attest.

Other than that, it seems to be SSDD. "Same Shit Different Day". Perhaps winter is setting in...

Now the strange path... My emotions seem to get the better of me too much lately. I've prided myself in being an immovable stone in the past, but even such strong things weather in time. I've always known I'm not not the most social or romantic person in the world, but I do have a heart... Or did... Cold and darkness are my motifs of the soul as of late, a progression that seems to be impossible for me to stop. Sleep eludes me, and I grow more irritable and strange by the day. WTF is going on?

Even musical tastes grow sinister... I've always liked metal, but I've truly started to identify with some very darker things lately.

Watch in its entirety if you dare, although I expect a rare few to actually tough it out.

Until another day, thanks for [enduring] reading.

If you haven't already, please go check out the ever incredible Ms. Churtch in her new set The Greatest Gift.



She deserves all the support you can give, and then some.

Sat outside alone and looked at the sky for awhile tonight. So incredible and beautiful, yet it leads to thoughts of how insignificant the Earth is in the grand scheme. Damn.


Honestly, I feel like my life is a series of failed attempts. So many things realized after the fact...Awesome things that have passed me by because I was either too stupid or shy to realize my chances. I fear life's perpetual, previous failures will undermine everything to come and so on... Fuck this.

Cue emo song from one of my favorite movies.