I was intending on uploading loads of pics for my 1st blog back at home, maybe start writing a sort of chronological account of the adventure. Describe the places we visited, the fun we had. etc.. etc..
But now that I'm sat here at my computer I find that I can't do it.
Not yet

Never in my adult life have I had any sense of "belonging" in the way I have the last 16 days.
I said before I left that it just felt right & that feeling never changed
It still just feels right.....

I wanted to spend every second of every day with her

The details will have to wait. I really can't face that right now.

Saying goodbye was one of the hardest things I've ever done

I miss her too much

I love her too much





We sat like this the entire time on the road.......what I'd give to be able to do it now

Well I'm actually doing it
I going on an adventure
I have a 9 1/2 hour flight ahead of me tomorrow & then 2 weeks of, hopefully, fun
I'm taking my camera & several memory cards so expect loads & loads of pics when I get back
I may not be able to get online while I'm away but if I can I'll update. let everyone know how things are going

This is so out of character for me & yet I'm not nervous at all.....very excited. but no nerves (so far )
It just feels right

well thats it..I need to sleep (like thats gonna happen) I leave for the airport in just over 8 hours.
This will be the 1st time I've flown on my own..I hate flying..but I really can't wait

I'll be back soon
love you all

When I grow up I want to be able to play guitar like Neil Young.
Went to see him last night in London
The guy is a genius & cooler than 99.99999999999% of the population will ever be

The only downside was not getting home till gone 2am & having to be in work at 5am for an 8 hour shift.
My back decided to seize up totally so I was tired & in total agony

but happy

seen an amazing show


& I've fallen for the sweetest girl in the world

the tickets are booked
the countdown has begun

I don't know whats happening to me at the moment
the last week has been one of the craziest, strange & happiest of my life
totally out of the blue
no warning
just BAM!!!!
& I'm in a place I hadn't thought possible
feeling things I haven't felt since I was a teenager

I'm hooked
I'm walking around grinning like an idiot

I'm about to take the biggest chance I've ever done
I'm a play it safe kinda guy
I don't take risks
I gonna take this one
whatever happens
right now
its worth it

I carried out my duties as taxi driver for my mother & 2 cats yeterday.
The cats are very cute (I still believe all cats are the devils spawn though ) If I get a chance I will post some pics later. So Kevin & Brian (don't ask!!! I've learned not to where my little sister is concerned ) have a new home.

I stayed at my sisters & watched the superbowl. which meant I was awake for exactly 24 hours yesterday. grabbed a few hours sleep & was then up to go out mountain biking in the rain & mud . I wa having an asthmatic day unfortunatley. & after just half a mile or so I thought I was gonna die . My chest was so tight it was scary & I thought I was gonna puke . I knw it doesn't usualylast long so I stopped & waited for 20 mins or so for it to pass & carried on. missing out the toughest section of the trail & taking the "easy" way to the top. After that I was fine. It was just me, the sound of the tyres on the trail & the wind. perfect.
I'm back at my sisters now. just had a long bath the pasta is cooking & I'm tired but relaxed

I've been feeling a bit on the lonely side again the last few days. I think its the insidious presence of Valentines day lurking on the horizon. I'll get over it. It's just be another Valentines day being single & alone..I should be used to it by now

I've rambled incoherantly for long enough.
Time to for beer & food

I love you all

FUCK I'M TIRED

*Yawns*

I may or may not be heading for my sisters tomorrow after work
If I do I'll be being a taxi service for my mother who's got next week off
I may or may not also be a taxi service for 2 cats which my sister may or may not be taking in. They were living with my other sister & her flatmate in London but they've had to move & the cats might not be able to go with them.

To sum up I've no fucking idea what the hell I'm doing the next couple of days

I'm sure someone will let me know at some point

For now I just need sleep

zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

time for an update

I really haven't got too much to say but I'll give it a go & see what rubbish I can come out with

I'm sooo fucking bored at the moment. With work & with the total lack of anything resembling a social life
I need to make the SGUK public meet in Birmingham, but I know I won't. I'll let the social anxiety take control & chicken out again

I managed to lose my phone a couple of weeks ago I didn't really miss it but it's still a pain in the ass. I lost a few numbers which stupidly I hadn't written down anywhere else
I got a new fancy contract phone. internet, camera, all that shit (I've finally joined the 21st century ) so I can get my SG fix & instant messaging while I'm out the house . that makes me happy

here's a few pics I took the other day with my new toy (they're not very good I manged to change the quality settings & haven't worked out how to change them back yet )

in other news my tickets for the 2nd Iron Maiden gig in Paris arrived today (my sis bought the ones for the 1st night last month) shame I gotta wait till July for the gigs though

I'd like to say how much I've enjoyed chatting to some of my SG friends on msn recently. I know I'm not the most talkative person in the world but I really appreciate you taking time to talk I'm not gonna mention any names..you know who you are

I'm thinking of doing a SB set
I guess my exhibitionist side is dominating over my shy introvert side again

all I need is some decent lighting (if I'm gonna do it I wanna do it properly)
an idea
& most importantly to lose the delayed christmas gut I seem to be developing
too much junk food, beer plus being lazy & not getting out on the bike is a bad combination
as you get older the harder it is to shift too... *sigh*



I think its time for a new profile pic too
I'm bored with this one

still not got much to say so here's some more photos






here's another one taken at the same time but it needed a bit more work.
I'm still not sure about the cropping