... So ... I'm back?

Tired. So tired. I'm sick of pretty much everything life throws at me, and I want to be done with this chapter of my life. Also, I kind of want to sleep until the world explodes. Not a happy camper.

Healed from sickness, but seriously angry with my body. It's gotten to the point where if something I eat touched gluten in anyway, even briefly, I'm done for.

Plus side? Found some gluten-free waffles at Whole Foods that look fucking delicious. Apples & Cinnamon for the win.

Laying in bed, sick.
Every which way I lay leads to suffocation and discomfort.
No Vicks in sight, so I improvise.
Tiger Balm leaves a burning sensation on my nose.
At least I can breathe. Sort of.
I am Robin's sick body.

- October 22nd, 2010

Nothing is working. I hate my immune system. It likes to gang up on me, you see. This is my only happiness right now.

Tiny Ball-joint dolls.




I WANT.

I am so fucking pissed off right now. It's hard for me to even think. My father, who up until around May wasn't even allowed to use the internet, has been having a cyber-affair with this random person since June. I just can't understand him. His ex-wife left him because she was having a cyber-affair, why the hell would he let someone else be on the other end of that stick?

He is such a child, he has no regard for other people's feelings, or even the consequences of his actions. No regard at all.

Ugh! I need to go take a bath, but our fucking water is turned off because we're having a deck built. Fuck.

Well, here's the afterbirthday blog. Get it... The afterbirth? Nevermind. Anyway.

So I woke up yesterday feeling pretty shitty. Like, seriously shitty, which has pretty much been a trend for me lately, wake up, greet the day, and curl up in a ball guarding my aching stomach. I talked with my mother a couple days ago, and have come to the conclusion that I need to eliminate gluten from my diet. Completely, because it seems to be the culprit when I look back on my diet these past couple weeks. The verdict? This is going to suck. I have to eliminate some of my favorite foods, like sushi (unless I just eat the raw fish), pizza (unless I get gluten free like last nights dinner, more on that later), bagels, etc. And I have to find the gluten free substitute. I can't imagine this is going to be cheap.

Anyhow, so I spent much of the day in bed, sometimes with my laptop, but mostly curled up asleep with Noah once he got home from class. I slept until about 5, then realized I needed to do laundry so I could have clean clothes for dinner. And then in a not so spur of the moment decision, decided I was going to cut my hair. Noah's mother, Lisa cuts hair, pretty marvelously in fact, so she cut it for me. And I must say, it looks quite wonderful. You can judge for yourself.



And then it was about 740, so I got dropped off at my mother's condo, and hung out with her and my stepfather for a little bit before we walked over the La Dulce Vita, which is this adorable little wine lounge in downtown Petaluma, (if you ever find yourself around here, you should totally check it out). My mother's on the city council, and my stepfather is running for school board, so we got there and they both kinda changed, became their public personas for a couple minutes before my mother was all "Okay, it's my daughter's 21st birthday, this is a family thing, so I'm going to have to keep these separate". So we ate outside away from all the important people who were doing a wine tasting.

We had this incredible gluten-free pizza there. Tomato, basil, mozzarella. It was absolutely delicious. I updated my mother on my life, what I've been doing. Talked to her about tabletop games, xbox, and so forth, and she actually seemed interested. Got her to agree to watch the first season of Big Bang Theory, even though she hates Kaley Cuoco. So, I'm gonna lend her that.

I was supposed to go to a movie with Noah and a couple friends after dinner, but that didn't happen because one of the friends got really impatient, and basically super moody, because I was still at dinner. My mother made me tell her my birthstory when dessert came, a vanilla bean gelato with espresso poured over the top of it. Fucking amazing. No joke.

After dinner Noah came to get me, and we hung out at my mother's place for a couple hours talking and stuff. All in all, it was the perfect end to a relatively perfect day. Thank you, world.

I'm going to be 21 in less then a day. I fuckin' rock.

It's officially a week until my birthday. I can't believe I don't have anything planned except possibly going to the Castro to see a movie. Which might not even be the actual day of my birthday. Meh. I'm so boring.

My 21st birthday is in 16 days. I'm kind of really really excited. I don't even like drinking all that much, I just like being able to hang out in bars with my older friends. Yeah, I know, I'm kind of lame, but I've already done that whole, wild parties thing, and the constantly drinking. I just don't really like it.

I'll love being able to have a glass of wine with dinner, though. That will be wonderful. I've had a sordid love-affair with Merlot since I was about 6. True story...

My mom used to leave her wine glass on the counter, and I thought it was grape juice, at first, and then I loved how it tasted, so I would sneak some whenever I could. I used to think I was so fucking sneaky, I'd drink from the bottle and then poor grape juice into it to fill back to where it was supposed to go. I didn't learn til later that it was obvious. I mean, I was only about 7...

Guess who's gonna be chillin' like a villain with RaymondAlginon this weekend? Yeah, that's right. Me. Boo and yah.

Also, looking for work, and pretty much no longer living at my father's house, now living with my friend. He's a great cuddle buddy. Go cuddlers!

EDIT Also, my birthday is in 20 days, and damn do i wish etsy had a gifting/wishlist system or something. Or if it does, holy shit. Cause there's some stuff i want on etsy so hardcore.