I'm considering a name change.
Sorry if this sounds egotistical but I do indentify with FF and it came to me without any effort which sort of confirmed that it was right for me.
However, I am toying with a change to.....wait for it, wait for it.....
Enabler.
Wadda yer think?
Hope you can be arsed to get back to me on this one chaps!
Sorry if this sounds egotistical but I do indentify with FF and it came to me without any effort which sort of confirmed that it was right for me.
However, I am toying with a change to.....wait for it, wait for it.....
Enabler.
Wadda yer think?
Hope you can be arsed to get back to me on this one chaps!
Roll up, roll up !!!
This is the only way to start you weekend ladies and gentlemen!!!!
I will now upload for your delecation my latest boxers!!!!!!
(Why the fuck do I think this is a good idea???
)
Anyway, here we goooooooooooooooo
First of all we have the black......
continuing on the its the black and grey/silver...
front and back view no less.....
and within this theme the black with orange band .....
Slight departure now........wooooo.....
and also ......
Winding up with the relatively boring white and green......
So, yes, there they were ........slightly obsessional amount of underwear but hey, I'm expressive!!
Any observations, comments, input, feedback will be greatfully taken on board!
Other than that I hope you have a fan-fucking-tastic weekend!
Keep communicating!
Love.....FF.
xxx
p.s. Cell phone fixed YAY!!!!
p.p.s. This is hysterical.....
This is the only way to start you weekend ladies and gentlemen!!!!
I will now upload for your delecation my latest boxers!!!!!!
(Why the fuck do I think this is a good idea???
)Anyway, here we goooooooooooooooo
First of all we have the black......
continuing on the its the black and grey/silver...
front and back view no less.....
and within this theme the black with orange band .....
Slight departure now........wooooo.....
and also ......
Winding up with the relatively boring white and green......
So, yes, there they were ........slightly obsessional amount of underwear but hey, I'm expressive!!
Any observations, comments, input, feedback will be greatfully taken on board!
Other than that I hope you have a fan-fucking-tastic weekend!
Keep communicating!
Love.....FF.
xxx
p.s. Cell phone fixed YAY!!!!
p.p.s. This is hysterical.....
I think I became a fan of R.D. Laing in about 2003.
This was after being lectured by a very insprational person.
Since reading more and more of his thoughts, I came upon a book he wrote called Knots, called so after the Knots we get ourselves in.
http://www.oikos.org/knotsen1.htm
The opening page reads ..............
"They are playing a game, they are playing at not playing a game, if I show them I see the game I shall break the rules and they will punish me. I must play their game of not seeing I see the game."
This blew my mind when I read it for the first time long ago and it still does, so much so that I am on the very verge of having it tattooed on me.
To me it just seems to encapsulate the little ways that people collude with each other and keep out any external influences and more than anything it highlights the ways that people maintain little cycles even when they are not helpful!
It's been another frustrating day and these words have been echoing around my head all day!
I feel so pissed 'cos It seems to me that I was/am one of those people who is not scared to speak out and say the things others can't/won't/don't.
The only thing about this is that rather than being recieved as a person who just wants to enable, I feel that people withdraw into their turtle shells and find ways to dis-able my positive energies!
Hence, "They are playing a game..........."
I really am so sorry for negative blogging, I wish you'd had a 3D experinence of me so you could know that I am a total live wire who is inantely optimistic!
Ah well, guess I'll save that for tommorow!
Love, FF.
xxxx
p.s. Gym was good this morning (7 a.m.)
p.p.s. Cell phone still not fixed !
This was after being lectured by a very insprational person.
Since reading more and more of his thoughts, I came upon a book he wrote called Knots, called so after the Knots we get ourselves in.
http://www.oikos.org/knotsen1.htm
The opening page reads ..............
"They are playing a game, they are playing at not playing a game, if I show them I see the game I shall break the rules and they will punish me. I must play their game of not seeing I see the game."
This blew my mind when I read it for the first time long ago and it still does, so much so that I am on the very verge of having it tattooed on me.
To me it just seems to encapsulate the little ways that people collude with each other and keep out any external influences and more than anything it highlights the ways that people maintain little cycles even when they are not helpful!
It's been another frustrating day and these words have been echoing around my head all day!
I feel so pissed 'cos It seems to me that I was/am one of those people who is not scared to speak out and say the things others can't/won't/don't.
The only thing about this is that rather than being recieved as a person who just wants to enable, I feel that people withdraw into their turtle shells and find ways to dis-able my positive energies!
Hence, "They are playing a game..........."
I really am so sorry for negative blogging, I wish you'd had a 3D experinence of me so you could know that I am a total live wire who is inantely optimistic!
Ah well, guess I'll save that for tommorow!
Love, FF.
xxxx
p.s. Gym was good this morning (7 a.m.)
p.p.s. Cell phone still not fixed !
Damn ! I have had a shit day! Why? Bored, thats why !
I have been bored and understimulated, in my room 101 boredom is my number one fear!
I could feel myself going down and down with the lack of stimulation and challenge, God if I'd have stayed at home I could have wrote a musical, built a small castle or critiqued the Bible.
I guess you get the picture, sorry for the vent, but I really hate under achieving. My unspent energy just seems to weigh me down and then before long my head and thoughts follow! Not good in general!
Kinda bizzare that its Wednesday and half way through another week, blogging regularly definately keeps you mindful of the passsing time !
Last night I was working in the recording studio I co -own
http://www.myspace.com/rightrealstudios
we were looking at (listening to) some tracks by an older singer (guy in his 60's) who died weeks after recording with us. His wife wants to release an album of his stuff and all being well it will be out by Xmas.
The songs he recorded really seemed to have an empowering quality and they felt kinda wise, if that makes sense!
He was a really amazing guy, who had certainly been around a bit believe me!
Anyway, despite my frustrating experience earlier today there certainly is cause for celebration as I now have flushing toilet !
FF
xxx
p.s. Just in case you don't get my profile sentence check.....
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YTwxiKMWCkg
If you can't be arsed to watch it all just fast forward to 1:20
p.p.s My Chick Corea ticket came !!!!!
I have been bored and understimulated, in my room 101 boredom is my number one fear!
I could feel myself going down and down with the lack of stimulation and challenge, God if I'd have stayed at home I could have wrote a musical, built a small castle or critiqued the Bible.
I guess you get the picture, sorry for the vent, but I really hate under achieving. My unspent energy just seems to weigh me down and then before long my head and thoughts follow! Not good in general!
Kinda bizzare that its Wednesday and half way through another week, blogging regularly definately keeps you mindful of the passsing time !
Last night I was working in the recording studio I co -own
http://www.myspace.com/rightrealstudios
we were looking at (listening to) some tracks by an older singer (guy in his 60's) who died weeks after recording with us. His wife wants to release an album of his stuff and all being well it will be out by Xmas.
The songs he recorded really seemed to have an empowering quality and they felt kinda wise, if that makes sense!
He was a really amazing guy, who had certainly been around a bit believe me!
Anyway, despite my frustrating experience earlier today there certainly is cause for celebration as I now have flushing toilet !
FF
xxx
p.s. Just in case you don't get my profile sentence check.....
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YTwxiKMWCkg
If you can't be arsed to watch it all just fast forward to 1:20
p.p.s My Chick Corea ticket came !!!!!
Did you ever have one of those ideas that are really just the greatest ideas in the world?
You know the ones that are going to change the course of the universe, or so it seems at the time!
Well, I had one this morning.
Out of the blue and unplanned I decide to take some photos of myself, so what I hear you ask 'cos you know everybody takes pics these days, post them on blogs etc. But wait, aha, these were going to be different, not only nude photos ladies and gentlemenm, but, in the bath!!!! And oh yes, wasn't this terrific thinking FF, go for it lad, great idea. I could hear the crowd cheering me on! "Go Force GO !"
So yea, yea, new batteries in the cam, camera on timer, camera getting all wet, posing like a motherfucker, still unpeterbed, thinking shit, this is gonna look so great on SG!
Now, I know I'm not greek god or anything, but well, I didn't think that things were quite so bad!
People, OMFG ! Talk about wake up call, it was a very sobering, pass the cigar won't you moment when I surveyed the results on my laptop!
Like I said I definately realise that I am not an adonis and I think I was doing this because I feel so expressive lately (some justification), but friends if you've ever been in the changing room at the store and looked in the mirror and thought ewwwww, well, this was the Mother of all of those moments this morning!
So, what learning has taken place? Well, it shows that it ain't easy looking good on cam and secondly that we should perhaps play to our strengths or thirdly, next time I have one of those 'great' ideas can somebody please give me a reality check!
I am really looking forward to work tommorow! God, gotta be up in 7 hours (no probs, sleep is for amatuers).
I only did one day of clinical practice last week and that is what I really thrive on, actually counselling people. As warped as this might sound I feel it is beyond a priviledge to be with people when they are in bits, lost or worse quite often.
So yea, that should be good, I have to see five people a day, which is a lot although we have loads of DNA's (did not attend) so we'll see.
Other stuff I may have a flushing toilet tommorow, woooooo, get me, where will it all end????
Planning your life around where you can go for a poo is rather tedious don't you know!
I didn't make the It Bites gig, (long story) worra bugger, although at least I got to see them once.
One that note I have got a ticket to see my uber, uber, uber musical superhero Pianist
http://www.chickcorea.com/
It's in London in November at the Royal Festival hall where all the avant garde types hang out (avant garde a clue right). He has been a massive influence and inspiration to me for 20 years and I have met him many times and I am glad to say that he is a humble dude despite world fame and appreciation.
Also, the first time I saw him in '89 (yes '89 and what an electrifying night) was the night my Mother died and this has made his impact on me all the more significant.
Right, if you've got this far you deserve a medal, if you quit earlier
!!!! Only kidding!
Have a great one!
FF.
xxx
You know the ones that are going to change the course of the universe, or so it seems at the time!
Well, I had one this morning.
Out of the blue and unplanned I decide to take some photos of myself, so what I hear you ask 'cos you know everybody takes pics these days, post them on blogs etc. But wait, aha, these were going to be different, not only nude photos ladies and gentlemenm, but, in the bath!!!! And oh yes, wasn't this terrific thinking FF, go for it lad, great idea. I could hear the crowd cheering me on! "Go Force GO !"
So yea, yea, new batteries in the cam, camera on timer, camera getting all wet, posing like a motherfucker, still unpeterbed, thinking shit, this is gonna look so great on SG!
Now, I know I'm not greek god or anything, but well, I didn't think that things were quite so bad!
People, OMFG ! Talk about wake up call, it was a very sobering, pass the cigar won't you moment when I surveyed the results on my laptop!
Like I said I definately realise that I am not an adonis and I think I was doing this because I feel so expressive lately (some justification), but friends if you've ever been in the changing room at the store and looked in the mirror and thought ewwwww, well, this was the Mother of all of those moments this morning!
So, what learning has taken place? Well, it shows that it ain't easy looking good on cam and secondly that we should perhaps play to our strengths or thirdly, next time I have one of those 'great' ideas can somebody please give me a reality check!
I am really looking forward to work tommorow! God, gotta be up in 7 hours (no probs, sleep is for amatuers).
I only did one day of clinical practice last week and that is what I really thrive on, actually counselling people. As warped as this might sound I feel it is beyond a priviledge to be with people when they are in bits, lost or worse quite often.
So yea, that should be good, I have to see five people a day, which is a lot although we have loads of DNA's (did not attend) so we'll see.
Other stuff I may have a flushing toilet tommorow, woooooo, get me, where will it all end????
Planning your life around where you can go for a poo is rather tedious don't you know!
I didn't make the It Bites gig, (long story) worra bugger, although at least I got to see them once.
One that note I have got a ticket to see my uber, uber, uber musical superhero Pianist
http://www.chickcorea.com/
It's in London in November at the Royal Festival hall where all the avant garde types hang out (avant garde a clue right). He has been a massive influence and inspiration to me for 20 years and I have met him many times and I am glad to say that he is a humble dude despite world fame and appreciation.
Also, the first time I saw him in '89 (yes '89 and what an electrifying night) was the night my Mother died and this has made his impact on me all the more significant.
Right, if you've got this far you deserve a medal, if you quit earlier
!!!! Only kidding!Have a great one!
FF.
xxx
I feel a little unsettled at the moment ladies and gentlemen, as you know I am moving to live closer to my new job. The kitchen and bathroom have been pretty unimportant and they have gotten a bit worse for wear.
So, before the house goes up for sale a new bathroom and kitchen is being fitted.and both rooms are happening at the same time!
Well, heres me.........
and guys believe me my stuff is everywhere, crammed into boxes etc,etc,etc!
Me again.................
and I thought I'd show you what I'm talking about.......
this is/was my bath, actually thats the new bath, although the rest of the room is like a wreck!
And............
this is the old toilet, which as you can see doesn't flush so very primitive methods have to employed!
Also,
this is the landing and heres me again...........
And last but not least...............
this is the kitchen tap!!!!
It will be another week to complete the work and it will be worth it, but, bloody hell its a bit unsettling!
Anyway, last week was good and I started my Psychotherapy traing which is going to be hectic and demanding for a year but again worth it.
Yesterday, I was training for the day on the, wait for it, TADA........the latest ammendments to the Mental health act of 1983. OMG, legis-fucking-slation, I would rather chew my own arm off!
I am off to see It Bites again tonight in Manchester and I may swing by the football ground and blow it up whilst I'm there!
So, chaotic is the word perhaps.
Also, just to say, and here comes the mush, lots of love and thanks to my mates on here, you make a difference to me, thanks!
So, heres me for the final time.......
Until next time, go out into the world and kick it's fucking arse! This is not a rehearsal!
Love, FF. xxx
p.s. Look out for a jointly authored sexy literary piece on here in the new future, It will be kinky to say the least!
p.p.s I took down my "set" called Suit it was late and I looked at and thought, my God you look ridiculous and deleted it, I still have it on my laptop so I may upload it again, any thoughts?
p.p.p.s More undies photos soon I promise!
p.p.p.s Any thoughts on men wearing womens knickers??? Don't go leaping to conclusions now
p.p.p.p.s. Cell fone still not repaired!
So, before the house goes up for sale a new bathroom and kitchen is being fitted.and both rooms are happening at the same time!
Well, heres me.........
and guys believe me my stuff is everywhere, crammed into boxes etc,etc,etc!
Me again.................
and I thought I'd show you what I'm talking about.......
this is/was my bath, actually thats the new bath, although the rest of the room is like a wreck!
And............
this is the old toilet, which as you can see doesn't flush so very primitive methods have to employed!
Also,
this is the landing and heres me again...........
And last but not least...............
this is the kitchen tap!!!!
It will be another week to complete the work and it will be worth it, but, bloody hell its a bit unsettling!
Anyway, last week was good and I started my Psychotherapy traing which is going to be hectic and demanding for a year but again worth it.
Yesterday, I was training for the day on the, wait for it, TADA........the latest ammendments to the Mental health act of 1983. OMG, legis-fucking-slation, I would rather chew my own arm off!
I am off to see It Bites again tonight in Manchester and I may swing by the football ground and blow it up whilst I'm there!
So, chaotic is the word perhaps.
Also, just to say, and here comes the mush, lots of love and thanks to my mates on here, you make a difference to me, thanks!
So, heres me for the final time.......
Until next time, go out into the world and kick it's fucking arse! This is not a rehearsal!
Love, FF. xxx
p.s. Look out for a jointly authored sexy literary piece on here in the new future, It will be kinky to say the least!
p.p.s I took down my "set" called Suit it was late and I looked at and thought, my God you look ridiculous and deleted it, I still have it on my laptop so I may upload it again, any thoughts?
p.p.p.s More undies photos soon I promise!
p.p.p.s Any thoughts on men wearing womens knickers??? Don't go leaping to conclusions now
p.p.p.p.s. Cell fone still not repaired!
Well, I feel fucking excellent! I feel inspired, upbeat and generally very fucking OK. Times like this are always a reminder that down times will end (for me) and that it's how I roll with them that is the "answer".
I was in the gym at 7 a.m. this morning and I think that always helps, it makes me feel invigorated, 20 mins on the rower and 20 mins on the treadmil no lessl! I thought you'd be impressed!
Amazing set on the front page by roane, phew, I mean phew! Talk about PSFB, my breathing went all erratic and also the wonderful miro redefines cutennes and sensuality!
I feel so expressive at the moment, ( I know I should be sat at my Piano composing then not writing this, ah well) thoughts about things I want to do and changes I want to make to myself etc. I know from my training that these "peak experiences" are to be savoured and that they are a real sign that one is quite harmonised and unified. I really get a lot from being on here and I am encouraged and inspired by the creativity and the artistic work that people display. I wish I'd have gone to the Tattoo convention in London and caught the SG stand, bugger, I just didn't put it all together and realise what was gonna be happening, maybe next year.
I was chuffed to recieve some kind words on my previous boxer short presentation and I feel more additions to my collection coming on.....any suggestions?
I wanna ask for you comments, feedback and input on 'Suit' my self shot "set" (coughs) , some people have been really kind and I would like to take in some more honest thoughts.
For your info, the set was quite rushed and I am a total novice photographer, I had been thinking that I would like to express myself like that for a while and I just went for it, if nothing else it really made me realise how hard these things actually are! I was gonna put it up in Suicide boys although I didn't take enough shots and then I got all insecure about the quality of it, if you know what I mean!
So, lay it on me, if you can be arsed to let me know I'd be really grateful
Also, and finally please watch my videos and see what you think, even if you don't like the music/lyrics you might like some of the shooting paticularly in "Don't take me down".
Right, thats thats then.
See you later, have a great one!
FF.
xxx
I was in the gym at 7 a.m. this morning and I think that always helps, it makes me feel invigorated, 20 mins on the rower and 20 mins on the treadmil no lessl! I thought you'd be impressed!
Amazing set on the front page by roane, phew, I mean phew! Talk about PSFB, my breathing went all erratic and also the wonderful miro redefines cutennes and sensuality!
I feel so expressive at the moment, ( I know I should be sat at my Piano composing then not writing this, ah well) thoughts about things I want to do and changes I want to make to myself etc. I know from my training that these "peak experiences" are to be savoured and that they are a real sign that one is quite harmonised and unified. I really get a lot from being on here and I am encouraged and inspired by the creativity and the artistic work that people display. I wish I'd have gone to the Tattoo convention in London and caught the SG stand, bugger, I just didn't put it all together and realise what was gonna be happening, maybe next year.
I was chuffed to recieve some kind words on my previous boxer short presentation and I feel more additions to my collection coming on.....any suggestions?
I wanna ask for you comments, feedback and input on 'Suit' my self shot "set" (coughs) , some people have been really kind and I would like to take in some more honest thoughts.
For your info, the set was quite rushed and I am a total novice photographer, I had been thinking that I would like to express myself like that for a while and I just went for it, if nothing else it really made me realise how hard these things actually are! I was gonna put it up in Suicide boys although I didn't take enough shots and then I got all insecure about the quality of it, if you know what I mean!
So, lay it on me, if you can be arsed to let me know I'd be really grateful
Also, and finally please watch my videos and see what you think, even if you don't like the music/lyrics you might like some of the shooting paticularly in "Don't take me down".
Right, thats thats then.
See you later, have a great one!
FF.
xxx
