I just wanted to do a quick send off blog. Yesterday marks one year on the site and my account will expire. Not sure if people can read the blogs of inactive members, but oh well if you can't. It has been nice obsessing over Bob and Phecda this past year, but SG never comes through my area and I guess I just don't have much more use for the site.

After a really long day staying in the hospital, I'm home from surgery. I had been waiting a while for this specialist to approve it, and finally went through with it. As a result I get to be laid up at home for 3 weeks in pain.. I moved into a new place with my girlfriend a month ago, and things have been going alright so far. Overall I'm doing much better than I was a year ago when I opened the account for this site. Maybe some day I'll come back...hopefully not because things have taken a turn for the worse. If anyone actually reads these and wants to contact me, you can find me on that social media book.

Haven't written in a while...mainly because I've been occupied with a lot. Since late May I've been in a relationship that seems to be going okay. Between my work schedule and her work and school, we don't get to see each other a lot. We plan to move in together some time after this February...I just hope I don't regret the decision. I've never lived with a girlfriend and I'm not sure how well I will handle it. It also feels a little rushed in a way. She's stuck living with her family for the time being and they're some shitty people. Her waste-of-space sister is a raging alcoholic who works at a liquor store and spends her sober time ignoring her 3 kids. My girlfriend made a comment about her blowing her kids off and the sister gave her a concussion. As expected, the police department I work for showed how piss poor our officer's work ethic is again. This brings me to my next point...finding a new job. I want nothing to do with law enforcement anymore. I see criminals and officers on a daily basis and I'm beginning to hate them both. About 4 years ago I graduated from the Academy of what I was told was "One of the Top Police Departments in the US". After seeing things through their eyes and resigning to take on civilian support roles, it makes me wonder just how bad other departments are. Out of the 30some cops I graduated with, I see maybe 4 that I can name who actually uphold the ideals of being a peace officer. The rest are lazy slugs who do what they can to skate by on the minimum. I was also cock blocked from a promotion recently, because they don't like the other people who I would be competing with for the position and had more seniority. Well there's my "fuck the police" tirade...on to other things.
If anyone is a Bob Suicide fan, you would have seen the Bob tattoo design I was planning to get. I'm still looking for an artists other than Hannah Aitchison that can execute this tattoo, but I might just try to get an appointment with her in August when I go back to Wisconsin for a wedding. Tattoos are on hold for the time being, due to my adventures in medicine. I was recently diagnosed with Ulcerative Colitis and it's causing other complications. I've seen two different specialists and had a myriad of unpleasant things done to me, only to have them throw more corticosteroids and antibiotics at me. I also had one doctor tell me a few months late that the results of a CT scan show enlarged lymph nodes and I should get another scan to rule out the possibility that I have Lymphoma. I've been in ridiculous amounts of pain the past 10 days and all I can do is down ibuprofen and hope it helps. I badly want an Irish Rootbeer, but I'm not allowed to drink with these meds. Something about toxic levels of serotonin doesn't sound pleasant.
To top things off, the MMO Final Fantasy XIV has been shut down until the unannounced re-release date. They talk about a Christmas re-launch, but Square-Enix is consistently late. This game pretty much filled my downtime at work and kept me out of trouble. I dunno what to do with myself now with all this free time.

I think I've decided I want my next tattoo to be of a Succubus on the upper left part of my back. Upper right is already taken up or I'd go big. Hoping J. Scott Campbell will do the artwork for me. I gotta hit him up on deviantart and see what he'll charge and all that. Got one tattoo artist in mind Hannah Aitchison from Deluxe Tattoo in Chicago. Finding the right artist to do the work is going to be the hardest part and I know I'll be super paranoid it won't turn out right.

I was having a good 7 days off of work. Just like always any amount of good days in my life are followed by at least one very bad one. Today had to be that day. It started off with bad news from a doctor...my family medical history has been catching up to me these past couple years. I thought I would talk to the one person that probably knows me best...my last girlfriend that I had been with for 2 years. I told her the bad news thinking she might be able to say something to make me feel better and the response I got was "Gross". I was already feeling pretty bad, defeated, and unwanted. That was kind of the last boot to the head while I was down. People have gotten pretty good at disappointing me lately. The rest of the day I've spent alone cursing my genetics and wishing I had someone to comfort me a little. Sometimes I feel like things are only going to get worse.

Home from California...sick with sinus/allergy problems and it's miserable. I got home to find out the 2 games I was really excited about being released turned out to be terrible. Resident Evil: Operation Raccoon City and Ninja Gaiden 3. Pretty pissed about that. The last 3 days I haven't felt like doing shit...which means I'm really bored and that's never good. Tomorrow I get to go back to work in my moldy ass office with recycled air...which is going to be hell on my allergies. I dunno where I'm going with all this bitching and moaning...so I'll cut it short. It's not like I have shit to talk about anyway.

My trip is still on the lame side and I'm pretty much ready to go home now. I need to make some friends in this town that actually know some stuff to do other than eat. Yesterday my dad wanted to check out the Southern California Comic shop, so we checked it out. Neither of us have collected comics for about 10 years. The last one I bought was when Dreamwave had a Transformers comic out. After looking around we realized comics aren't the same anymore. Way too many damn spinoff series. I noticed some company called IDW is doing Transformers, Ghostbusters, and some other 80s cartoon classics. I also found out that Deadpool is back. I thought the series had died, but I guess it's back with some different artists. I still think Don Figueroa and Guido Guidi were the 2 most badass artists I have ever seen in the comic book industry.

After getting my nerd on, we went to Union Ale House by my Aunt's house. I tried some of their brews. I've noticed there are a shitload of IPA beers here, which I'm not really a fan of. Our bartender Lauren was hot...and by the time I thought "Maybe I can get her number and I'll have someone to hang out with when I visit" I was sloppy drunk and her shift was over. I come from the land of pussy 3.2% alcohol beer and this shit was 7% or better. I'm also a lightweight to begin with, so I was well on the road to making an ass of myself. Back at the house I managed to fall up the stairs and almost knock this crazy Don Quixote painting over. At some point I managed to get on facebook and do a round of harrassing comments on friend's posts...which I didn't remember doing at all. We ate dinner in downtown SD and I totally forgot what I ordered after staring blankly at the menu. 4 hours later I was still drunk, so I just took my ass to sleep.

Woke up today to find out we're going to eat more GD Mexican food. I'm sick of it. Then I find out that both of my aunts are probably crazy when it comes to parenting. I guess I can't really talk shit, since I can't have any kids of my own, but it seems a little weird when a 6yo boy can't wipe his own ass, demands to have milk in a baby bottle before bed, and sleeps with his parents every night. Then my other aunt talks about breast feeding her kid till he's 5. I think when the kid has teeth and starts talking, then suckin' on a titty is a little odd. I'm beginning to wonder if mental illness runs in the family.

The California trip is not going the way I had hoped. I'm dealing with the nagging pain of a torn internal muscle...one I have no voluntary control over, so it doesn't want to heal. Treatment options are not pleasant and it's an ongoing source of stress for me. On top of that, my family that I'm visiting here didn't make any kind of plans for stuff to do, which kind of pisses me off. I didn't come here to sit around and do shit I could be doing in lame ass Oklahoma. We went to Stone Brewery yesterday and ate, which was alright...but today the best they could come up with was to go see some old ships in the harbor in downtown San Diego. That turned out to be kinda lame and we just drove back to the house. The trip was just long enough for me to start thinking about the usual depressing shit, so my day is currently off to a bad start. The top of the list of bad thoughts is that I've been single for a while. I'm not saying I require a relationship to function, I think it's more the lack of physical contact that is making me crazy. I'm very affectionate, and I guess it kinda destabilizes me when I'm starved of it. I guess reality is also finally setting in with this crush I have too. I'm coming to the realization that she's not going to notice someone like me and lives about 1,500 from me...so why should I bother anyway? Yeah, I have similar interests, but I don't consider myself to be all that attractive and I don't have loads of money. I also had my ability to reproduce removed...so I probably made myself unattractive to most of the planet. I had my reasons to do it and they weren't up for debate.

I need to stop being so down on myself. I'm hoping this trip turns around, so I don't go home with feelings of regret.

I survived St. Patrick's day with my friend Josh for his 30th birthday. I managed not to get shitfaced, and I think it was because Josh was the entire day. He's usually the one pushing the booze on me. The main reason I didn't drink much was because I had to get on a plane this morning at 6am. We started off at Twin Peaks and toured a couple strip bars (I don't recommend them if you're in Okc) with our pack of friends and I dipped out early to catch a nap before flying out.

Flying was actually kinda scary today. Both plane landings were pretty rough, and I can now say that twice in my life I actually felt my life might have been in jeopardy. I was pretty disappointed to walk out of the San Diego airport to 50 degree weather and rain followed by a couple minutes of hail. Hopefully this doesn't last, because I only packed two pairs of jeans and didn't bring a hoodie. I took it easy as usual on my first day...traveling here between time zones always messes me up. We just got the family together and tore up some mexican food and Carona's at Chevy's. My dad, who flew in from Wisconsin, had to dig into the liquor cabinet straight away when we got back to the house. Apfelkorn and Clase Azul Tequila...which I don't imagine mix well in your gut.

I shot the shit with my Uncle, who owns "Salon Salon" in Rancho Santa Fe, CA (shameless plug) and ran an idea about a tattoo I'm thinking up right now. Thought maybe I'd start a tradition of adding a tattoo when I viist. I was lazy this year and didn't sit down and get to photo editing, but I did find a picture that I want to kind of set the style for the whole tattoo. I also want a pinup girl tattoo some time in the near future. What I found to get me started was a Hannya Mask which would be 1/3 of the tattoo. I want to find a good picture of a Tengu and Oni Mask to go with it. Tengu mask I think would have to be in the center or it the elongated nose would throw the balance.

It dawned on me last night that it's kinda pointless to make blog entries when I have a grand total of 5 friends. That means nobody reads this shit and most definitely won't comment on it. I gotta branch out and meet people, but I'm against the idea of being a friend whore and blindly grabbing people. I gotta scope people out and find common interests before I send friend requests...which can be exhausting. Anyway I just got an e-mail that my points with Thinkgeek.com are about to expire, which upsets me for some reason. I wish I could transfer them to someone else, but I can't, so now I'm gonna browse the site to see if there's anything worth grabbing.

As usual, I gotta leave you with a song...if anyone is even looking at this.

"Like my scrotum, here it is in a nutshell" --It's just a couple days 'til my yearly trip to San Diego. Just working today and tomorrow, then gonna get trashed with my friend for his 30th birthday on Saturday. Hopefully I won't be hungover for the flight at 6am the next day. A couple of my co-workers were sick last night...one decided to show up. I've always had a pretty strong immune system, but I'll break my foot off in someone's ass if I end up sick during my vacation. I really need this time to chill out and stop thinking about how I'm not getting laid all the time.

On an unrelated note, I finished Mass Effect 3 last night going the paragon route. Was disappointed with the ending after I picked the synthesis option. I think next time around I'll do a female Shep and try a class other than Vanguard. I'm gonna be tearing it up on Resident Evil: Operation Raccoon City after I get home on the 25th though...so whenever I have time I'll get back to ME3.

Speaking of being a nerd...I think the SG model Bob is awesome...wish I could meet someone like her. Kinda upsetting that most girls that are into games are downright homely. At least that's my experience 99% of the time. And the good looking ones are taken or fucking mental like one of my exes. I still have bad dreams and a bad disposition toward red heads because of that knife wielding bitch. Anyway...Happy Ides of March and California--get ready for the Inevitable Return of the Great White Dope.