jackINtheBOX

she'sssssssssssssssss back!!!

well i moved into a wee little room in a 2 bedroom with a couple ( friends of mine) my stuff and my kast are living with others for now adn i started working at Planet Ink on sunday and taking my dad to radiation treatments ............we are almost done
so yeah been fucking busy off my tits of late............
but i smile and laugh each day at some point or another
this has been a very difficult month....i heard myself say
"i am stronger than all this!"
so seems i ain't quite giving up yet
peace

moving day tomorrow....AGAIN............... this time it's a move and a split but we are trying to be "adults" and such about it
it's hard
dad starts radiation next week
and work is INfuckingSANE
awwwwwwwwww thye wonders of life. i tell ya i would be crying if i didn't laugh and drink so much
*smiles*

*hint FOUR BROTHERS ( the movie) is gonna we awards i tell ya
lolololololololololo but was a way to shut down for an hour or so.
mew mew meOW

i've been on a bender
my head hurts ....................

it is sunny today so i must go out and ride
i started a bike gang too
my gang name
"Bubbles"

i want to be happy and i joke laods but really i feel like hell, i am down i am just well shitty.
granted LIFE COULD BE WORSE and i do try to rememeber that.

so yesterday we got the final news. dad does indeed have cancer of the vocal cords * this on top of his speedy decline into Alzheimers* and will require radiation everyday for 4 weeks..................

it is not the cancer that scares me...it happens and i personally know what it is like. it is the daily radiation and trips to teh hospital that we will have to make.
he is already crazy in the head and cannot understand what is happening to him. telling him he has cancer everyday is hard, trying to explain why we are causing him to hurt by treating this illness is fucking killing me.

i start to move my shit into storage this weekend and teh kats go next week
nothing like a few bad things happening to you to make you FEEL ALIVE!!!!
i am climbing up and out.....jsut slower than usual
peace

ps. Skeleton Key...the movie..........sucks ass!!!

this week was fucked....had monday off * boss was getting tattooed* worked tuesday, went WILD on wednesday with the gang , thursday fucked off, and today tried to work but was juts not into it ya know.
sucky pay check this week.............i am down, angry and kinda keep thinking i am going to cry
BULLSHIT i tell you this breaking up stuff sucks ASS!

...but WEDNESDAY rocked.......i went on every ride that ever scared me and laughed my face off...............thank you dave for taking all us freaks!!!
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