Greetings from glorious Rochester.

I was actually thinking this might be sort of a nice part of Rochester, but actually it's a bit of a blah part of town. But I did find a noncorporate eatery called hots where I got a mediocre dinner and got to watch House for the first time in a while.

Night before last I had a dream where I broke my left wrist, It was pretty mangled. Then later on when i was at my delivery stop my left arm was really sore and weak and I couldn't account for it, and I was thinking oh fuck, but then it hit me that the problem was that I had been wearing my watch. It was the first time it happened with this watch, which has a worn out velcro band, but what happens when I have a watch with a tight band on my left arm is that the muscles(i think) don't get move as freely around the screws and plates that my arm was repaired with when it was broken. So I generally wear my watch around a belt loop. A while ago I another similar dream of massive breakage, but it was my teeth, my teeth were all destroyed like a shattered plate and then later in the day I broke a tooth.

Wow that was exciting.

Today I've been thinking about the trouble I have owing to my strongest emotion being fear. Sometimes direct fear of something particular, but most often just anxiety that seldom goes away.
When things about work piss me off I tell myself that those things are irrelevant. What is relevant is that I have let fear rule my life and it is that which has brought me to where I am, and what am I going to do about it. I guess maybe I have to meditate on it, examine it very closely, and try to do things that my fear would normally inhibit me from doing. But there are certtain things that I have so long avoided that i really don't know how to do them.