deviant (n) - 1. A person who deviates, especially from norms of social behavior.

2. A thing, phenomenon, or trend that deviates from an expectation or pattern.

dissident (n) - 1. A person who formally opposes the current political structure, opposes the political group in power, opposes the policies of the political group in power, or opposes current laws.

2. One who disagrees or dissents; one who separates from the established religion.

Deviant = 854 (D4=E5+V700+I9+A1+N40+T100) (2x7x61)

854 = comfort of my lips (insincere condolence).

2 = in the manner

7 = to be severed, forsaken; to stray (in solitude); to loose oneself, to vanish; to perish, to be undone; to sever, scatter, to dissipate; destroy, to bring to ruin, to rob. Will, choice, desire.

61= Weapon; ornament; sword. Discernment, understanding; pr.n. "Intelligence", Binah ---the third Sephira, considered the feminine or passive potency

The choice to stray from discernment and understanding.

Dissident = D4+I9+S90+S90+I9+D4+E5+N40+T100= 351 (33x13)

351 = 'Ishim (Hebrew), men-spirits who, according to the Zohar, mixed themselves with mortal men, having come to earth to do so (Genesis 6:2-4). The 'ishim are chained on a mountain in the desert, which means that they undergo descent into material life and confinement in incarnation. Azazel and the six other 'ishin teach humankind to make weapons and utensils, and impart the knowledge of various other arts. The god of might or victory has been turned into a god of evil, his benefits into seductions, and his chivalrous sacrifice into a rebellion. He was, like Baphomet, turned into a goat -- the scapegoat of the Old Testament, whose name in the Hebrew is Azazel.

To hold up one's head; to carry or wear; to bear sin. To be obscure, dark. To be dangerous, deadly. Scapegoat.

3 = Chief of a family or tribe; forefather, cherisher, sustainer; teacher or adviser. To enter; to lead to, to bear.

13 = To unite. To cut or wound; to decide or destine; to bind or join. To rumble; growl; to speak; to sign; to meditate, answer, think; devise, plot; to separate. To shout, cry, roar, sing; be powerful, strong.

Chief to unite and lead the tribe in a powerful roar to cut free of the rulers, to seperate from the established power.

Deviant854 + Dissident351 = 1205 (5x241)

1205 = Adversary, fallen, to smite, to instruct

5 = To be bright or fresh; to thrive, to bloom. Turning or surrounding; circumstance or cause. Fugitive. Vapor, mist.

241 = A word, poetic speech, song of victory. To be sharp, to be bitter. To be perverse or rebellious. "Babel-born".

The poetic speech shall thrive amongst the rebellious, the fugitives shall sing a song of victory as they emerge from the mists.

Yeah so I've been assigned to the 5/14th Cavalry, we're a brand new unit. Our barracks are ghetto as hell they were here when the Japanese flew by and attacked Schofield on its way to Pearl Harbor. There are a few bulletholes still in the walls from where they hit. They say these barracks are considered a historical monument so they can't be torn down. I still haven't had much of a chance to explore the island due to lack of transportation. I was hanging out with Ian in Waikiki, he's a friend of mine from back home who joined the Navy but he just got deployed last Saturday so now I'm just kinda stuck where I am.

So I just got out of basic training and AIT and finally got to take some leave. Fort Knox sucks, never go there. In a month I'm flying off to Hawaii where I'm gonna be stationed with the 25th ID. Should be fun shit a lot of people have told me Hawaii's a good station the only problem is everything's expensive as hell over there.

Almost Halloween, I can't wait for the insanity to begin. I'm going to dress up as Jesus for Halloween this year, although I'm still debating over whether to be the Buddy Christ or the Passion of Christ Jesus. I really want to go into a church dressed as Jesus and start preaching all kinds of heresies . Throwing a party at my friends house, probably gonna end up eating some shrooms or acid and engaging in all kinds of craziness as the dead come out for the night. The only problem is we can't find any virgins to sacrifice to Satan, but then again VA has had a virgin shortage since the 80s. Well all of you kids out there have jolly fun on Halloween and remember what its really about, dressing up as monsters so when the dead walk the world that night they will think you are one of them and not eat your brains.

It's been forever since my last update, which is mostly due to my lack of internet connection right now. I'm kind of squatting around right now sleepin on coaches and slingin shit for money. I should be starting my new job soon toting sheetrock with my friend for a construction supply labor. Nothing beats a nice long day of manual labor. Hopefully I can get a place of my own soon, it'd be nice to have a place to call my own. Richmond's been alright so far, hasnt changed much since i moved down to Georgia. The only problem with Richmond is theres no good metal clubs, but hopefully that will change soon.

Gone to Virginia.

I am currently preparing for a migration back to the city from which I left a year and a half ago. I originally came down here to Georgia to get off the streets, to get away from everything so I could examine my vision and find my path again. I have come to the realization that my place is with my tribe, without them I am nothing. I brought a group of my friends together and gave them something to believe in, something to hope for. Even in my absence they have carried on that dream. So now I must go back, for together we can change things, if not for everyone then at least for ourselves. I go to help create a new world for all of us so that we may leave behind this world of lies and pain. I may not have access to the internet for a while so I don't know how long it will be till I get back on. I've enjoyed this site and wish the best for you all, hopefully I will have a chance to get on at intermittant moments and keep in touch with you until I get settled in there.

I hate the world that our culture has created. With each passing day I lose more and more hope that our culture will be changed peacefully. I feel like if I dont do something then it will end in extinction and the burden will lie on me for not fighting hard enough, for not struggling against the odds and overcoming the behemoth that our culture has become. Yet it seems the more I try to talk to people and explain to them why we are destroying ourselves they just alienate me and view me like a pariah. Sometimes I think in the end the only solution will be war, that those loyal to B will gather under the Anti-Christs banner and there will be a great war as was predicted. Perhaps it will take a war to show people that there is another way, that they dont have to surrender themselves to being enslaved to this hell we have created and waste their lives miserable and alone. When I see whats going on in the world today how Bush is trying to spread his new world order and assimilate everyone, how the jihadists are threatening to destroy all non-Muslims, the millions of impoverished people starving while the rich grow fat of the fruit of their labor I know that we all have a responsibility to end this. It is on our generations shoulders to put a stop to this because if we dont we will witness the extinction of mankind.

This day all gods die.

I dont update my journal enough. So I just looked at th SGATL group a second ago and realized everybody was hanging out tonight, and i missed out. That sucks. Jem gets to go to Canada, lucky bitch, i hope she has fun. I want to move to Canada, especially if Bush gets re-elected, this country is fucked. So yeah life sucks, Georgia sucks cause I still dont know anyone here and dont really have any friends. Makes me want to use drugs but I dont really have any reliable hook ups right now. At least I've still got my music, without that I would have gone insane long ago (although some would argue I went insane years ago). I saw Spider-Man 2 today, it wasn't as good as I'd hoped it would be, and I dont think Spider-man ade a single witty comment or sarcastic come-back. It's just not Spider-man if he isnt making wise-ass comments when he's locked in an epic clash with a pompous villain. But oh well, I'm just waiting for the next X-men movie. The X-men were always my favorite group of superheroes but thats just cause im a dirty mutie .