My New Religion
I'm fed up with the current religions. Seems like, no matter what religion people pretend to belong to, they basically use it to make themselves feel better by pushing others down. So, I hereby create my own religion. And here are my commandments:
1. Thou shalt treat everybody as an equal, regardless of race, creed, gender, breast size, trouser bulge, or wallet contents.
2. Thou shalt wear comfortable pants at all times.
3. Thou shalt not wear a tie, except at funerals, weddings, and other sad occasions.
4. Thou shalt drink sacramental booze in fellowship with your group of friends.
5. Thou shalt stand up for those who cannot stand for themselves.
6. Thou shalt not peek down any woman's blouse, unless it is REALLY low cut.
7. Thou shalt not act superior to others, regardless of their idiocy.
8. Thou shalt not join a frat or sorority.
9. Thou shalt call thy hookup within 48 hours of leaving their bed.
10. Thou shalt not admit to peeing in the shower.
11. Thou shalt not be a Republican (or similar in other countries)
12. Thou shalt respect anyone's refusal of giving thee bootay.
13. Thou shalt read for pleasure.
14. Thou shalt not judge someone by their dye job
15. Thou shalt give someone a chance of a date, regardless of their magazine style attractiveness, or lack thereof.
16. Thou shalt not poke thy nose into other people's sex lives, as long as all involved are consenting adults.
17. Thou shalt go for a walk in a natural place.
18. Thou shalt live deliberatly (read, people!)
19. Thou shalt not take fad medications.
20. Thou shalt kiss a stranger, then run away giggling.
If you live your life according to these 20 commandments, well, I don't know what will happen. But you might be happier.
I'm fed up with the current religions. Seems like, no matter what religion people pretend to belong to, they basically use it to make themselves feel better by pushing others down. So, I hereby create my own religion. And here are my commandments:
1. Thou shalt treat everybody as an equal, regardless of race, creed, gender, breast size, trouser bulge, or wallet contents.
2. Thou shalt wear comfortable pants at all times.
3. Thou shalt not wear a tie, except at funerals, weddings, and other sad occasions.
4. Thou shalt drink sacramental booze in fellowship with your group of friends.
5. Thou shalt stand up for those who cannot stand for themselves.
6. Thou shalt not peek down any woman's blouse, unless it is REALLY low cut.
7. Thou shalt not act superior to others, regardless of their idiocy.
8. Thou shalt not join a frat or sorority.
9. Thou shalt call thy hookup within 48 hours of leaving their bed.
10. Thou shalt not admit to peeing in the shower.
11. Thou shalt not be a Republican (or similar in other countries)
12. Thou shalt respect anyone's refusal of giving thee bootay.
13. Thou shalt read for pleasure.
14. Thou shalt not judge someone by their dye job
15. Thou shalt give someone a chance of a date, regardless of their magazine style attractiveness, or lack thereof.
16. Thou shalt not poke thy nose into other people's sex lives, as long as all involved are consenting adults.
17. Thou shalt go for a walk in a natural place.
18. Thou shalt live deliberatly (read, people!)
19. Thou shalt not take fad medications.
20. Thou shalt kiss a stranger, then run away giggling.
If you live your life according to these 20 commandments, well, I don't know what will happen. But you might be happier.
APR 30, 2008 02:08 PM
APR 30, 2008 02:54 PM
APR 30, 2008 03:06 PM
APR 30, 2008 05:30 PM

DevilsReject
Cleveland, OH
February 2007
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