I'm finding dating women lately to be hard. Which it HAS NEVER BEEN. I'm not even sure how to go about solving it. You need to take chances girls, without that your not really living. I guess thats how dating a bi girl works. Shes fine to fuck a guy anytime but when it comes to the girl shes been longing to boink and enjoy on all levels she pussies out. literally PUSSIES out lol. I guess I need to find that little niche of hippie earthy girls because man I had fabulous love affairs in that plethora of beauty and open-ness.
ya know?

Vegan diet except for fish. So far so good, feel a little weak but I will get the hardwireing worked out. I had major breathing issues last week and almost called 911, well I did but I failed. Now I have some new meds and a new inhaler and a machine coming woah. It might not be hot but I wont go down like my mentor and love did 10 years ago, he died in his sleep due to sleep apnea. He was 31. So do what ya gotta do cuz i'm living a long ass time WORLD! You hear me oh great one?

Just not digging lately people saying alot of shit and not being that way or falling through. Like i'm 30, not 20. Its not cool. I let that weird funky energy and anything negative it entails flow right through man. buhbye. Not sure how long I will have this account but thats fine by me. I dont fit in here. I just talk to a few, check up on Quinne lol and read alot in the kitchen.
I am so sad for these oil spills in our oceans. IF you are near an area that can use help or donations, please do so.
i'm out. gott drink my b12 supplement drink.
namaste peeps

MY SKIRT FOR THE BRIDAL SHOWER, HANDMADE MMHMM


MMM GRILLED PINEAPPLES


MY DREAM GARDEN--I WILL GET THERE


EARTH LOLLIES YAAAY


BACK OFF HATERS. CUTE BOHOS AND GREAT DESIGNERS


PLAN AN OUTDOOR SOIREE, MOVE YOUR REAL FURNITURE OUTSIDE FOR THE DAY. SO RAD


ORGANIC STRAWBERRIES, WE ARE GROWING THIS YEAR WOOT


SEW YOUR GRANNYS OLD DOILIE ONTO A CUTE PILLOW UBER GRANNY CHIC


ARTICHOKE MMMM COULD IT GET BETTER



CUTE CLOTHES YAY


GARDEN GOODNESS NOMNOM


I MAKE QUILTS, DID YOU KNOW


SALANDS RAWWWR YUM


LIFE NEEDS COLOR

So today is earth day. HOORAY! Although I think everyday should be, its good this day is here to teach and inform the young and old how they can make a small but significant difference in the way our world is. Today I will use no electricity <my laptop is on battery until it runs out lol>, I will use no water except what we already have in jugs, I will drive nowhere-I will take my bike, I will plant flowers with no pesticides, I will recycle, I will freecycle, I will not use my gas stove, I will not take a shower <and live the words *dirty hippie*>, My breakfast came from a mile away and it was delish, I will consume no dead food, i.e. I will eat only raw food and obviously no animals, WHen it gets dark I will use my organic soy candles to light my home. What are you going to do? I decided at a young age this would be important to me, luckily as I grew my social life followed suit with my beliefs, the music I was engaged in and lifestyle that followed that music was huge in teaching me about such matters. I could go on forever on here on what you can and cant do. Do one thing man, 1 thing. It will snowball. Its all about the snowballs
love and great blessings, namaste...i bow to the divine within you all.




THis home is what we plan on retiring to, or very close to it. Close to earthships in the AZ desert. They are uber sustainable and damn fine looking



This is a room I adore. THe walls are covered in reclaimed wood. HAve you tried using that? It is so beautiful and tells such a story I dont really get why youd want new wood. People that move into homes and want brand new floors because the original wood floors arent even in tone or are rough. Thats fucking style, thats history, thats substance. Wake up.


a freecycled room


i dont need to say organic you know. eat local eat fresh. it helps your body and your soul

Friday was datenite and I had a killer meal and STILL stayed within my Weight Watcher points! We still havent found valances. Where can I find rad valances? Bueller? I really didnt want to make them because sadly enough they will end up being much more money if I do that. I have decided <I think> to paint my deep purple bedroom Tiffany Blue-or something verrry similar. We shall see.
Ive been doing 15 minute power walks twice daily along with my yoga. I go to the dr on tuesday to see if they can help my many MANY serious issues I have because I chose weight loss surgery. Ugh. I see many days at the hospital in my future lol. No biggie, fortunately for me I love the hospital.
Joes bday is 4/20. I ordered him a lost cake. With the sides being beach and palm trees, and the top having a crashed plane, the dharma logo and the lost logo. I bought him 2 rad presents and my parents just told me they got him a blueray for our 48inch tv lol. Im going to surprise him since he took his bday off, so the day before im gong to show up at his work with cupcakes and candies and balloons, and then take him to lunch. He's going to be 32. Ive been with him since he was 21. Wowzers.
I got my fave girl some rad presents for when she visits. I can not wait to smooch her oooh lala

~How did your Easters go? We had a tiny dinner w/out my bro and his fiance. He never missed holidays until they got engaged. Rawr. I also had to make our families side list for her bridal shower. I dont believe in bridal showers, I think they are greedy and wasteful. I chose not to have one and I REALLY dont want to go to Sarahs. But I will. It is going to be excess to the hilt and ugh my soul is going to die a little. I WILL be grabbing recycling and doing it, she can just deal. Im not letting them get to me or her or her choices. I have been in good moods so we will just let that ball keep rolling.



We have been fixing up our house and I lurv doing that! I like to organize haha but I'm really excited to plant new bushes and some flower boxes. Im also going to try to grow veggies, specifically mini tomatos! yum. I'm really trying hard to kick prepped foods to the curb though.



balloons make everything better. there is no occasion where you cant have a balloon. ask my granny. she requested everyone release one at her funeral. it was magical.

I'm excited to go to theme parks and fairs. swings are my fave. even at the play ground. remember when youd link with the person next to you and call it a spider?



let spring soothe the aches that winter caused, physically and mentally.
Angd when all else fails, have a mimosa.







go barefoot, listen to some chill music, take a roadtrip, give someone a flower.
yay spring

My brother and his fiance arent coming to our Easter dinner. I guess I give up on that front. I guess it is what it is. I wont have to fight for attention though ahaha, he monpolizes my parents and doenst include me in the convos, it all gets to be a bit much. I'm making individual cakes from a pan that looks like very large eggs. Joe is excited to decorate them haha. What do you like about easter?
I rented the 4th kind and was like woah. Have you seen it? BIZARRE and I had no idea it was going to be like that. eep.
Still doing weight watchers. Here is a rad salad we made. Spring mix, baby greens almonds goat cheese and a meyer lemon vin. yumo.
this was also tasty. Polenta and poached eggs, rawr. Cmon you cant go wrong with that. Nor this...

Spring is great but sinus issues are HARDCORE hell haha. I still lvoe the flowers though. We are doing our yard clean up this weekend, and im going to reeeally try to plant some flowers.


I got out my boho stuff, and all my jewelry oh how I missed it. This is really my perfect outfit, all of it. but not for a bride.

Also loving all the flower hair things about....do you like the feathers and flowers and things in the hair?

lucas. he is a transgendered sexy bitch <and lead singer of the cliks>. and my masturbation material lol but really his voice i cant get enough. and did i say he was fucking the secks? ohhhhhhhh man
FUCK YOU LADY GAGA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


xtra fashion cuz im really into it as i revive my wardrobe.



this might be the dress i wear to his wedding. the detail, that you cant see oh man its gorgeous and floooows. but you never know till the day of haha its also the most at 398 right now.

I am so glad spring is here. Winter was killing me. Damn it takes a toll on you mentally.
Now its time to breathe.

Get outside and have some fun!!!

Bring spring into your home, freshen up your stale sheets and bedding, lighting, rugs and so on...



Proseco with pear simple syrup. mmm

Spicy baked plantain chips yummmm


I am trying to learn blazers. this is going to be a go to outfit for me. i hope haha.


and my love loooooooooooooooooooooooove lately has been lucas. he is a transgendered man and leader of the cliks who killlllllllllllllllllllllllll.
FUCK YOU LADY GAGA

Tomorrow we are celebrating my Moms 50th birthday, and of course she requested a Thanksgiving dinner haha. Im going over early to decorate, altho I went last night and wrote on her car windows and front door, I tied cupcake balloons to her porch too. So while I'm there asking what are we doing for your bday, they say oh Trev and Bitchface <my bro and his fiance> arent coming they took us out <to a really fancy restraunt> last weekend. Im like ohhhh so they arent coming its going to be and us vs. them thing. IF you read before i'm having issues with them both about the wedding and just how they conduct themselves and exclude my husband and I. I have never been invited to their house as a couple <excluding holidays> and Ive begged them to do things with us and they turn us down. Really its her and i know its her. Its exhausting to deal with and I feel like we arent as good as them because they have a bigger house newer cars better jobs lalalalalalla and the clincher, they will have kids and we wont. I need to work on how to deal with them without loosing my mind in therapy.
Anyway...this weekend will consist of staying on my sleep schedule, wii fit, treadmilling, richard simmons-ing lol, thrift store-ing, and spring/summer shopping. Im also planning on drinking alot of wine tomorrow night and watching Amelia, ohhh and I rented the morgans movie with SJP




Yummy foods...
Udon w/poached egg

Braised Chicken




HAnnah Beth

polenta with mushrooms and leeks

Fennel Beet and Orange salad


This is another dress I was looking at. It seems very old hollywood to me.










i am smitten by a kitten <3 woooooot!

The weekend went by fast. It was so nice during the week and then it was like brrrrrrr since friday. I want it to get nice because I want to paint my shutters, door and awnings a rad shade of sort of merlot w/a pink back tint? lol
So I have been told I am a candidate for Trans Cranial Magnetic Stimulation, and it would be to help my bipolar. It is for people who have been on meds for years and still cant function to their full capability. I have an appointment with my psch, tomorrow and Im gonna get the lowdown. It would be every day 40 mins at his office in the chair pic below. They explain it that its the strength of an mri machine, it uses magnetic fields instead of the old scary shock therapy. I shall fill you in later.



I'm doing good on my new regime of health. Tomorrow is a major bike session, got my bike all spiffed up today. Ive been eating so many veggies it is insane. I am loveing spinach, eggs and ground chicken! What foods are you loving that are good for you? What could you NEVER GIVE UP?



I had a little New Moon party at my house. I bought my grandma her fave dinner and candy and surprised her with watching it. She read the books with me lol. It was so fun and then we went through all my pictures, she is so awesome.
Speaking of awesome, I watched Kirstie Allies new show and it was hilarious lmao, I LOOOOOOOOVE HER and have forever but omg. I will for sure be watching all season.

My brother is getting married and its at a very super fancy olllld catholic church in Detroit where alot of celebrities got married and its at night so I have to be really fancy. Here some ideas so far.






some randoms

Ahhhhhh! Spring is finally here <basically>. I am SO glad to see the sun and see it longer. THANK GOD.
I am following weight watchers and feeling better. Walking like a freak and bike riding. I am going to start renting a workout dvd a week from the library, I really wana work on yoga, gotta get flexible for my girlie
What is your fave way to workout? do you do anything interesting that most people dont?

I have been watching the last season of The L Word, Counting calories, Taking pictures, Playing with my dogs, Skipping arouind Toys R Us, Buying baby goodies for my very preggers lil cousin, Smoking pot to help with my panic disorder, instead of my pills, Taking bubble baths, Playing my Wii, and wooing the bestest girl ever.
Here are my pics...

















Yeah I love SAMANTHA RONSON, watchs gonna DOOOO about it?

weekend good. so far so good. even if my hubby has been working crazy overtime. he's been in a great mood when he gets home. thank god he took me out for coffee and books tonite.
other things ive been doing....

~gave up soda
~vacuuming like a fiend
~laundry
~reading
~drinking sobe waters
~weight watchers
~treadmill-ing
~getting my bike ready for late night rides...

and im liking or am involved in some way to this stuf.....



i made this wreath.