into: all the things a good fat guy should be...eat, drink, repeat.

makes me happy: country music

makes me sad: country music

5 things i can't live without: yakuza, diet dr pepper, meat, my personal lord and savior jesus christ, mass market fiction

vices: the usual, nicotine and alcohol. nothing beyond that. yet.

occupation: Fun Manager

current crush: red pepper

stats: lame.

body mods: Augmented from a AA to a full C.

heroes: Chicken Cutlet

gets me hot: a good chicken fry.

favorite position: any will do as long as all the parts are in the right place.

fantasy: so simple, yet obviously so very very hard to accomplish. at least for me.

sign: Champagne Of Dudes

most humbling moment: losing a rousing game of battleship with a blind mildly retarded albino monkey midget with no thumbs.

i lost my virginity: more recently than i'm comfortable discussing with some GOT DAMN STRANGER!

CIGARETTES: I have black lungs

MY DIET: Omnivore

ALCOHOL: I am a complete drunkard

MY DRUG USE: Up the nose

I AM LOOKING FOR: a woman

MY KINK FACTOR: I'll try anything once, especially if you beg for it.

MY POLITICS: None apply, you assholes

POT: Occasionally

MY STATUS: single

I WANT: Romance, Booty, Friendship

MY PIGEONHOLES: Emo, HipHop, Arty, Indie Rocker, Fashionista, Retro, Hillbilly, Hipster, Rockabilly, Bookworm, Geek, Gamer, Fuck you, I defy categories