no makeup just woke up but was feeling kinda cute today so decided to take a few pics for the boy. posting here as a general update of what i look like these days:
fucking ex is on my nerves today. wanted to go get lunch, and he's too busy talking to some bitch online, and is like "im busy, maybe in an hour"rolf. must be nice when i'm paying. fucking douche.
anyway...
things with corey and i are amazing and i love him. gushy, fuzzy, warm and delicious as it should be.
fucking love this boy.
canadian winter is tripping as usual. one day 70, the next, snow. lol. i do love calgary i will miss being here.
hopefully Tennessee will be awesome.
<3
Cass
fucking ex is on my nerves today. wanted to go get lunch, and he's too busy talking to some bitch online, and is like "im busy, maybe in an hour"rolf. must be nice when i'm paying. fucking douche.
anyway...
things with corey and i are amazing and i love him. gushy, fuzzy, warm and delicious as it should be.
fucking love this boy.
canadian winter is tripping as usual. one day 70, the next, snow. lol. i do love calgary i will miss being here.
hopefully Tennessee will be awesome.
<3
Cass
life is so crazy.
i'm happy to say that it's changing for the better - although a lot of stuff is up in the air, one thing is true, i'm happy to fly by the seat of my pants when i feel like i have people behind me.
i'm still in calgary with the ex, living here until the end of may when i plan to get out of canada, and get back to the us. not sure where i'll land. maybe az, maybe la, maybe go to tn now, not sure. what i am sure of is that i have a life to look forward to, with a lot of blessings i never imagined...and it's all based on 2 months of spending all my time with the most amazing person i've ever met.
destiny has a funny way of not taking no for an answer. i really thought i'd never leave this place, and i thought neil and i were destined to be together. i purposely ignored any warning signs of our incompatibility because i thought i could surpass them all. i thought i could get past them or fix him. truth is, i feel love really shouldn't be so much work. some work is fine, but when you feel like you have to swim upstream so much it's hard. when things take the natural progression, and the natural way it's so easy for me to follow.
i just wanna get back to working, making money, paying off accumulated bills, and getting to tn to start my life with him tbh.
he's adorable
but beyond that he's amazing in every possible way - smart, funny, sweet, kind, sexy as hell <3
well
i'm crazy about him just saying.
until next time,
XOXO
Cass
i'm happy to say that it's changing for the better - although a lot of stuff is up in the air, one thing is true, i'm happy to fly by the seat of my pants when i feel like i have people behind me.
i'm still in calgary with the ex, living here until the end of may when i plan to get out of canada, and get back to the us. not sure where i'll land. maybe az, maybe la, maybe go to tn now, not sure. what i am sure of is that i have a life to look forward to, with a lot of blessings i never imagined...and it's all based on 2 months of spending all my time with the most amazing person i've ever met.
destiny has a funny way of not taking no for an answer. i really thought i'd never leave this place, and i thought neil and i were destined to be together. i purposely ignored any warning signs of our incompatibility because i thought i could surpass them all. i thought i could get past them or fix him. truth is, i feel love really shouldn't be so much work. some work is fine, but when you feel like you have to swim upstream so much it's hard. when things take the natural progression, and the natural way it's so easy for me to follow.
i just wanna get back to working, making money, paying off accumulated bills, and getting to tn to start my life with him tbh.
he's adorable
but beyond that he's amazing in every possible way - smart, funny, sweet, kind, sexy as hell <3
well
i'm crazy about him just saying.
until next time,
XOXO
Cass
well,
with a twist of luck, we don't have to move, which means i can stay here until the end of may when my immigration extension runs out. i have to be honest, i won't miss having to deal with that.
things have been strange, still living w/ex while talking continuously with new boyfriend can have it's issues, but we have gotten by. i love Corey more everyday - seems it's mutual, and i have to say i've never been so crazy about EVERYTHING about a guy before as i am with him. it's nuts.
me and the ex are going to the mountains overnight, leaving soon. he's been pushing SO hard to go, we've been saying for awhile we would, and it's fine but my honey is sick, and it's so shit to be separated from him, ugh. i dunno i missed him like mad yesterday and i feel like it's gonna suck not to sleep on skype with him but we will just have to deal.
CORRECTION:
He acted like an ass, so we didn't go, and I got to spend the whole day with my sick boyfriend, making him feel better if you know what i mean <3 worth.
sometimes neil needs to grow the fuck up.
he always thinks corey and i are bashing him or making fun he's like paranoid.
gonna go play some video games, and swoon over this boy <3
enjoy your night,
xoxo,
Cass
with a twist of luck, we don't have to move, which means i can stay here until the end of may when my immigration extension runs out. i have to be honest, i won't miss having to deal with that.
things have been strange, still living w/ex while talking continuously with new boyfriend can have it's issues, but we have gotten by. i love Corey more everyday - seems it's mutual, and i have to say i've never been so crazy about EVERYTHING about a guy before as i am with him. it's nuts.
me and the ex are going to the mountains overnight, leaving soon. he's been pushing SO hard to go, we've been saying for awhile we would, and it's fine but my honey is sick, and it's so shit to be separated from him, ugh. i dunno i missed him like mad yesterday and i feel like it's gonna suck not to sleep on skype with him but we will just have to deal.
CORRECTION:
He acted like an ass, so we didn't go, and I got to spend the whole day with my sick boyfriend, making him feel better if you know what i mean <3 worth.
sometimes neil needs to grow the fuck up.
he always thinks corey and i are bashing him or making fun he's like paranoid.
gonna go play some video games, and swoon over this boy <3
enjoy your night,
xoxo,
Cass
im more sure i'm doing the right thing as time goes on. only because since i'm still living here, i have to go through the motions constantly with neil and talk things out.
i feel like this is good because, well it's easier to get your head around things when you talk them out over and over again.
i literally do not remember feeling the way i do about Corey ever in my life, and i can't stop smiling being around him and i adore this guy with all that i am. crazy? maybe. but it's absolutely amazing to feel this crazy about someone.
i feel like this is good because, well it's easier to get your head around things when you talk them out over and over again.
i literally do not remember feeling the way i do about Corey ever in my life, and i can't stop smiling being around him and i adore this guy with all that i am. crazy? maybe. but it's absolutely amazing to feel this crazy about someone.
Isn't it interesting how meeting someone can really open up your eyes? I wonder how I get so fixated, and stuck in a situation, and I put up with unfathomable amounts of crap - for YEARS, then I'm like "oh hey I can do better". Wonder how my mind ever got so convoluted.
But this new boy - he's too wonderful to be away from. I couldn't talk to him all afternoon yesterday and it was absolutely breaking my heart. Have you ever known someone that you just met but you feel like you were childhood friends? I feel like I've known this one for years. Like 2 peas in a pod, kindred spirits. I dunno, I can't just chalk that up to some sort of coincidence.
But this new boy - he's too wonderful to be away from. I couldn't talk to him all afternoon yesterday and it was absolutely breaking my heart. Have you ever known someone that you just met but you feel like you were childhood friends? I feel like I've known this one for years. Like 2 peas in a pod, kindred spirits. I dunno, I can't just chalk that up to some sort of coincidence.
i never knew what it would be like to have this....not actual ryan gosling, but like this non stop laughter and silliness with a person for no reason. this is how he makes me feel.
how the hell am i not supposed to gravitate towards it?
and today i said i wouldn't talk to him all day, so i'm just depressed.
i bought champagne, wine, and a bottle of bourbon, game on.
how the hell am i not supposed to gravitate towards it?
and today i said i wouldn't talk to him all day, so i'm just depressed.
i bought champagne, wine, and a bottle of bourbon, game on.
i do feel really stuck. i feel like all my friends are so far away and honestly they don't even know about this now. things have changed so much within the last month.
i feel like i've had such a wake up call....all the things i felt in the pit of my stomach before were not right, have continued to be confirmed.
people don't change - being here hasn't changed anything. all the things that were bs before i came still are. i truly believe with all the time and money spent, he could have given me a little more than he has.
is it any surprise when someone else comes along that my head perks up. i forgot what nice guys were like tbh. it's been so reinforced that i should not like them anymore anyhow b/c they are weak. what's wrong with a sensitive person? what's wrong with someone that wants to tell you they love you multiple times a day?
how can you be shocked that i really want and deserve to be treated right? if you can't do it, then you should understand why i need it with someone else.
what a hassle. i wasn't planning on leaving this place ,packing up my car and driving back to la. what a shitfest. if i leave he's fucked, nowhere to live, no job, but i can't sacrifice all this $, ugh.
and now i have to sit here policed not able to even talk to this boy. i feel so selfish, but i just wanna laugh i don't want to have to think about all this HEAVY stufff.
i feel like i've had such a wake up call....all the things i felt in the pit of my stomach before were not right, have continued to be confirmed.
people don't change - being here hasn't changed anything. all the things that were bs before i came still are. i truly believe with all the time and money spent, he could have given me a little more than he has.
is it any surprise when someone else comes along that my head perks up. i forgot what nice guys were like tbh. it's been so reinforced that i should not like them anymore anyhow b/c they are weak. what's wrong with a sensitive person? what's wrong with someone that wants to tell you they love you multiple times a day?
how can you be shocked that i really want and deserve to be treated right? if you can't do it, then you should understand why i need it with someone else.
what a hassle. i wasn't planning on leaving this place ,packing up my car and driving back to la. what a shitfest. if i leave he's fucked, nowhere to live, no job, but i can't sacrifice all this $, ugh.
and now i have to sit here policed not able to even talk to this boy. i feel so selfish, but i just wanna laugh i don't want to have to think about all this HEAVY stufff.
can someone please explain why boys are so confusing?
and why does this shit always happen to me?
i really wish i had someone to talk to but i feel like i'm never alone long enough to have a convo about it with anything.
2 guys - basically my best friends
sounds like it should be great but it's hard as hell.
ugh.
and why does this shit always happen to me?
i really wish i had someone to talk to but i feel like i'm never alone long enough to have a convo about it with anything.
2 guys - basically my best friends
sounds like it should be great but it's hard as hell.
ugh.
i met a boy that i love more
than i ever did you before
so stand beside the river i cried
and lay yourself down
look how you want me now
that i don't need you
this guy - is kinda unreal. i literally have nowhere to brag about him so i am going to brag here.
he's smart, #1, which i find extremely attractive. he's funny, #2, like that's the best. we can start laughing about absolutely nothing at all - we find all the same stuff riddic funny and just giggle and act like school kids in love. it's like we can't even hide it around other people (including my boyfriend btw). he's sweet, and has no problem with being overtly so.
i dunno i've never had a guy play guitar for me, or learn a song i liked only to play it for me.
he's told me he wants nothing more than to look into my eyes and tell me he loves me. like i literally cried the other day when he said it, i've never felt so touched by the sincerity of what a person says before it's crazy.
we literally spend every free moment together, and it's blissful.
he told me today - let's just be in love.
like who says stuff like this, is this real life, lols?
i say: i need you like a heart needs a beat
he says: i need you more than the air in my lungs, the legs i walk with, the voice i talk with, the food i eat, and the time i spend asleep - you make everything better. i love you and need you sweetheart
man<3 i just am reveling.
and now he's playing guitar for me.
swoons.
more later
Cass
than i ever did you before
so stand beside the river i cried
and lay yourself down
look how you want me now
that i don't need you
this guy - is kinda unreal. i literally have nowhere to brag about him so i am going to brag here.
he's smart, #1, which i find extremely attractive. he's funny, #2, like that's the best. we can start laughing about absolutely nothing at all - we find all the same stuff riddic funny and just giggle and act like school kids in love. it's like we can't even hide it around other people (including my boyfriend btw). he's sweet, and has no problem with being overtly so.
i dunno i've never had a guy play guitar for me, or learn a song i liked only to play it for me.
he's told me he wants nothing more than to look into my eyes and tell me he loves me. like i literally cried the other day when he said it, i've never felt so touched by the sincerity of what a person says before it's crazy.
we literally spend every free moment together, and it's blissful.
he told me today - let's just be in love.
like who says stuff like this, is this real life, lols?
i say: i need you like a heart needs a beat
he says: i need you more than the air in my lungs, the legs i walk with, the voice i talk with, the food i eat, and the time i spend asleep - you make everything better. i love you and need you sweetheart
man<3 i just am reveling.
and now he's playing guitar for me.
swoons.
more later
Cass
