MC Lars emailed me yesterday, apparently he remembered meeting me like 3 years ago.
he gave me his number cuz hes gonna be in sf today.


i feel important and/or awesome.


weirdness.

i haven't been on this in forever.

i got new tattoos
i just got back from almost a month of a disasterous vacation.
i cut off most of my hair

anyone hear the new MC Chris? it's amazing

i still want to model, i just don't know where or for what. guhhh.

there's a new livejournal community about bashing kids on myspace...
because, i guess, this is important to people...
it would be interesting to make one of these groups just to see how quickly 15 year olds and really lonely 20 year olds get when they spend too much time online.

anyway--
they had a whole thing about me, and the main negative points were:
how i was "like 15"......hahaha
how i'm a "total slut".... i didn't know you could tell how many people i've fucked from my pictures
how i should "omg stfu about dinosaurs already god"
how my house it dirty....?
and how i have "obvious tattoos".... (ignore the fact that a tshirt can cover my chest piece and my arm tattoo is on my upper arm)

so, anyway, theres "extra points going to who finds her on suicide girls"
here you go kids, hahahaha.

i turn 19 next month and i'm hoping, unlike last year, i get a party (one that my friends actually show up to)
yeeyee.

i met a boy with star wars tattoos and an mp3 player full of my favorite bands.
could i ask for more?
yes, i could, but he's already gorgeous and the sweetest thing and has a huge--- yeah....
so, no, i couldn't really.

Slammers! by the instant messengers comes out on the 17th.

this is going too well.
i'm scared.

i'm so rediculous sometimes...


myself (and my purse-- yes, specifically my purse) were banned from Ted's house, because after a huge fight with a mutual friend (jonny) that spanned from October till now, Jonny and i made up, and ted's friends didn't want us to (i'm assuming that's the reason, because i got banned during the make up process)
i find this endelessly hilarious.

the new instant messengers album comes out next month, i'm so stoked it's sad.


my godfather died 6 days ago...
i haven't actually dealt with it yet, i've been denying it, everytime i start to cry i pretend nothing has happened.
it's not fun, i want him back, i love him so much.
fuck.

R.I.P.
Andres Lejarraga
August 15, 1950 - March 14, 2008

i broke up with indy

because he's too needy

and i'm still so fucked up from an old flame

fuck!
this isn't fun


i also have 2 little girl crushes
i'm trying to get to a Nerf Herder show on Friday
and i've got a rave on Saturday

ughnguhgbngnnggnjfdkhgskjdfghsjkh

i can't stop half crying
hoora!

recently, i've lost some very close friends for no reason but my own morals and their lack of.

but i've gained a few.




my friend Amber Nicole and my boyfriend Indy.
huzzah!

also, my pterodactyls are finnished.
not the *best* picture in the world, but all i got...





mmmm...yesyesyes.


PS, does anyone know about the SG exclusivity contracts being voided in CA?

i'm leaving Suicide Girls....
myspace.com/saint_puck
or
AIM-- sonnisaurusxo

if you wanna keep in touch

i don't have to tell you why i'm leaving, you've all heard the reasons before


good luck to all the other hopefuls....


EDIT!!!!
sweet, they didnt delete my account. guess i'm active until further notice. wooo.

I CANT SLEEP EVER ITS ALMOST NOON AND I HAVNT SLEPT YAYYYYYYY
shoot me in the temple please

updates--

i have a boyfriend who treats me amazingly well, and if you know me at all, it's an insane shock.

i've been spending almost no time in my town and it's amazing.

i saw Cloverfeild on opening day (i shit my pants in joy)
that movie is so good and fucked with my head so bad.
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!

i also saw Pansy Division and Kepi The Band (Kepi of the Groovie Ghoulies new band)
and got a free kepi back patch from the bassist! who's also Danny from the Secretions. damn yes.
the show was at Gilman in Berkley with the Avangers, Rock and Roll Adventure Kids, and a band that's got members of ex-Sex Tape Scandle, one of which tried to get me in a 3way with him and his gf. yeah awkward.

AND I GOT A NEW TATTOO WOOOOOOOO!!!!
its not finnished quite yet, i need to get their bellies covered, but i'm already so stoked.
since sg's blog is being gay as shit i'll post the tattoo picture when it's all finnished

picture time!

christmas went better then expected.
my family got me a lot of hoodies.... which is kind of odd.
and a mug.
do i look cold to you?
strange.

i've been feeling wrecked and hopeless lately,
and i've decided on moving to New York.
i've told my mother, just so she can help me with arangements,
rachel, because shes my best friend, and my friend shane.

i dont think i'm going to tell any of my other friends until right before i move, because, frankly, most of them suck ass and it'll be nice to have them all be like OMG I WANNA SEE YOU DONT LEAVE.

once i get things aranged, i'll tell my dad and the rest of my family, and the rest of my close friends, but i dont think i'll even tell most people i'm leaving.

i think one reason i havnt suceeded is because i have no ambition, and i'mjust so used to sitting and wallowing in hopelessness and depression.
its easy to get used to depression, and when no one i ever telling you "get a fucking job" or "pay fucking rent" its really easy to sit on yer ass and slack off.

i dont want to be a slacker, i don't want to be a failure, i want to GET THE FUICK AWAY!

also, in new york, i won't KNOW ANYONE!
everyone in the fucking bay area knows me, or we have mutual aquantiences, and it's fucking creepy, and it's annoying, and i want to meet someone new, and maybe, just MAYBE, even interesting.

i've got a plan
i'm giong to talk to mom about moving there, living with my aunt, or grandma, for a while (probably aunt as my appearence would likly KILL my grandma)
get a job
get an mp3 player! because god knows i need one now and i will DEFINNETLY need one there
and get the fuck out of this place


not for good, i know i couldn't leave the bay forever.
a year or two maybe?
then come back, or move somewhere else first?

come back, move to the cit maybe?
who knows, maybe i'll come back and everything will be the EXACT SAME (which is far more then likely)
and i'll peace out again.
that would be sweeeeeeeeet.

new years resolutions:
get a real fuckin job
become an official sg
and move to ny




baller!
this is the only real life plan i've ever had.damn girl.
the things you can think up and accomplish after booze, tears, second hand smoke or the mary jane variety, and listening to your friends talk about boats.