Thank you everyone for your concern and comments yesterday! Today is a new day and I'm feeling a little better. I go to see the doctor today to find out about my back and why it still hurts. I sat in the park for a few hours yesterday, watched the sunset and chain smoked... Was able to get my head right for the most part. I'm alive another day at least and I know it's going to be a good day... I hope! Lol thank you again to all my amazing friends for your support and concern!