Funeral day. Didn't this just happen like a month ago? I don't like that. I don't like a funeral in the first place. This one is worse. Alot worse. It hasn't hit me yet. And when it does, it's going to fucking hurt. Not to mention the fact that my nana is trying to cause a stir at the funeral. I love my nana, but REALLY WOMAN? Fuck. Let the man rest, and ignore his family's problems with you. If his family gets attitude, don't retort. But my nana being my nana, who also just got home late last night from Norwich/London, she will be in a bad/sad mood and probably will cause something. Worstest part? I have no Reekie or Sgt to talk to when it hits me. Not unless Dad lets me use his phone. Which I doubt since last night he told me he WON'T lend me $10 to go to the Dr's [even though Reekie spent my $50 that was going towards that visit] and this morning he snapped at me for using all the Splenda that I BOUGHT. Well, Reekie bought, but still. Reekie bought the coffee and the sugar, and usually the milk. Stupid fucker is getting on my nerves. I can't borrow ten dollars to get better? REALLY? Wowie.

Anyways. Soooo I hate reading bitchy, whiney status updates. I understand if something upsetting happened, so just say it. You'll get the sympathy you desire. But this stupid "I wish I had a friend" bullshit is OUT OF LINE. You are twenty fucking years old, pull your panties out of your cunt and act like it. You have friends you selfish fuck, and most of them bend over backward to make sure that you don't get upset in any way. Your friends constantly comment on your status's and tell you they're here for you when you need them. Obviously you don't need ANYONE if your friends aren't good enough. I'm sick to my fucking teeth of reading your whiny crap about your parents, your asshole, dickweed, good for nothing boyfriend, and your pathetic life that you're unable to live. I live 5 mins from you, I don't work, and you don't think you can call or text me when you're upset? THEN WE AREN'T FRIENDS. I don't need bullshit, fake ass people like you in my life. I used to love you, you were one of my best friends, and now you can't even talk to me?
Honestly, I'm kinda ok with that. I don't need you blowing up the phone each night about how your fucked up boyfriend fucked up, hurt you, said something out of line, or didn't come home. That's what you get for dating him, that's what you get for taking him back after you already broke up, and that's what you get for dating a

Each day that passes is another reason to be excited for Texas. Not so much that I'm getting closer to finally seeing him again, but that each day seems to be harder and harder on me. Waiting to find out what the hell wrong with me, Bob's death, bad people in my life. Just, oh my god. I have rarely been this excited for a fucking break. I honestly wouldn't care if all we did was lay around and watch movies. It's going to be so fucking nice to get away from so many problems and issues and hurt. Sure, it's going to hurt to have to come back home, but still.

I have to finish getting ready for the funeral. My hair isn't done and we're leaving soon. Not to mention the fact that my tummy hurts and I won't be able to eat for a while. Ick. Bye bye for now.

XOXO
Bukowskii


RIP Bob Plummer