Seattle has a whole lot of churches. Churches everywhere. Also religious schools, bill boards, television shows, etc. But Seattle's religious scene is nothing compared to what I'm bombarded with here in the South. Can't go anywhere without tripping over a bunch of physically small but piously huge churches. Big churches, small churches, red churches, blue churches. Church signs everywhere. At least half a dozen religion based channels on the local TV lineup. Big ass giant crosses next to the free way. Pithy religious bumper stickers on every pick up truck, etc. All this religion slapping me in the face got me to thinking this morning. Not about Jesus and the state of my soul or the hereafter or any of that. I was thinking about the inherent contradictions in christian dogma. More specifically, I was contemplating the concept of sin and how it jives (or doesn't jive) with the christian big guy himself. I'm talking about the real sins. The big ones. The big baddies that are the worst sins you can commit. Not those pissy little venial sins that you can make go away with X amount of Hail Mary's or Our Fathers. I'm talking about the really bad ones, the ones that are supposed to let ol Satan himself in to party, The Seven Deadly Sins Which are, in case you forgot, Lust, Gluttony, Greed, Sloth, Wrath, Envy and Pride. The point of all this, is that it occurs to me that God himself embodies most of these sins. Let's run down the list...

Wrath... This one is easy. The whole 'vengeful God' thing says it all. According to the Bible, God gets awfully angry all the freakin time. Smiting this and smoting that. Raining fire and brimstone down on whole cities, etc. God is a seriously angry deity! You could say that God has a anger control problem. So, God is angry. That's a sin.

Envy... This goes right along with wrath. Not only is God vengeful, he is also a jealous God. It says so right in the book itself. Thou shalt not put any gods before me. Sounds like a jealous boyfriend. God gets jealous, then he gets angry, then people go to hell. Yay God! That's 2 for 2.

Lust... I don't know too much about God's sex life. There is a lot of sex in the Old Testament, but it's never God getting his holy rocks off. It's always some douche bag deflowering his brothers wife or his daughter or his goat or some shit like that. So God never gets it on himself (except that one time with Mary, but one lay hardly makes a sex fiend), but according to the churches I grew up in, God cares an awful lot about virgins and virginity. And I know how virgins make me fell. Giggity. But I'll cut God some slack and not attribute this one to him. 2 out of 3 so far.

Sloth... And on the seventh day he rested. Sounds like laziness to me. If idle hands are the devil's play things, then a whole day of rest sounds down right devilish to me. Plus, what about all those prayers that go unanswered? All my life, I was told that I should pray to God. But God never replied. Guess he was too busy resting to be bothered. Yep, that's a sin.

Greed... Why does God want all of our prayers? And he wants EVERYBODY to believe in him and only him. Sounds awfully greedy to me. Like a little kid who won't share his toys with the other kids. And according to some preacher type people, God not only wants our faith and our prayers, he also wants our money too!! Holy shit! This guy is supposed to be infinitely powerful and all knowing, yet he still needs a chunk of my sad little pay check? WTF? Get a job you lazy greedy bastard!

Gluttony... Ummm, unless God wants all those prayers so that he can eat them, I don't really see this one. UNLESS he doesn't want us to believe in other gods because when we die, he eats our souls. Hmmmm. I may have to let God pass on this one. Theoretical soul eating isn't enough to convict in this case.

and that brings us to Pride... God is chock full of pride. Just read pretty much any page in the bible. 'I am the one true God', 'Put no other gods before me', 'Look at my works and rejoice', etc. All over the place God goes on and on about how awesome he his, how he was the first god, and the one true god, and how he has the all time high score at Tetris. Pride, yeah. God's got plenty of that.

Out of the Seven Deadly Sins that God hates and despises before all other sins, God himself is guilty of at least 5 of them with the jury still out on the other 2. So in conclusion, God is a greedy, lazy, jealous boyfriend with anger issues and a huge ego who may eat souls and have a thing for virgins. Sounds like a great role model to me.

Life in the red state goes on...

Went to Jazzfest on Saturday. It was very very hot, very very crowded, and a whole lot of fun. I have to be careful when talking about Jazzfest, or people will get the wrong idea and think I didn't like it. I do have several complaints about the day, but overall, it really was great. I don't deal well with heat and direct sunlight. As I tell 217 all the time, I am not solar powered. I am dark powered. So 90 degrees and 90% humidity with no shade tends to make me feel not so good. Also, Jazzfest is a giant money sucking vacuum. $50 per day per ticket for the basic admission ticket, $4.00 waters, no re entry, parking fees, etc. Jazzfest did manage to suck a pretty good chunk of change out of us. And for the size of the event, the venue just isn't big enough. It was crazy crowded. And it was muddy. Wet, squishy, slimy, slippery, horse dung smelling mud everywhere. But it was a lot of fun. We got to see a bit of Chick Corea, the Roots and Steel Pulse. We ate a bunch of festival food and had some hurricanes. All in all, it was a great day.

Today (Sunday) we went and saw Ironman and Harold and Kumar: Escape from Guantanamo. I really loved both of these movies. I'm not going to go all geeky over the greatness that is Ironman, I'm just going to say that it is one of the very best comic book adaptations I've ever seen. Very few complaints, lots of praise. Great flick. Harold and Kumar was also surprisingly good as well. Considering it is the sequel to a stoner tittie movie it had a lot of plot and character development. Well done follow up to a good stoner flick. And it wrapped the story arc up nicely. No loose ends, no obvious opening for another sequel. Two good movies in one day. Doesn't happen all that often.

So we made it to Baton Rouge. Been here a few months now. Its ok. Not a bad town, but its definitely not Seattle. I was spoiled growing up in an extremely liberal (for the most part) city. Baton Rouge is so damned conservative. And it's one of the more liberal cities in the south. More on that later though. I will say this for Baton Rouge, I do love them southern ladies The Beach Boys were right about that much. But seriously, I miss Seattle. I miss my friends, I miss the night life, I miss my clubs, I miss PURE Cirkus, I miss Neighbours, I miss SCARE, I miss the weather, I miss the Puget Sound, I miss air that is more gaseous than liquid. I can't wait to move back home. Unfortunately, that will not be for some time yet. After we are done in Baton Rouge we have to go somewhere else for Liz's vet internship. RIght now the likely choices are Phoenix, New York, and Anchorage. Phoenix can go fuck itself with a cactus. It's the hottest metro area outside of the middle east. Forget that. New York is New York. I'm ambivalent. Anchorage would be cool. I like Alaska. I like the cold better than the heat. And they got a lot of bud up there. So as of now, I'm voting on Anchorage. More later...

I was informed that I need to update. So here it is...

So there is much newness going on. First off, there was a death in my family recently. A few weeks ago my aunt died *sadpanda* It wasn't unexpected, but still very upsetting. She was my mom's last living relative, so she's taken it pretty hard. But that's enough of sadness.

I recently joined the circus. That's right, the circus. Pure Cirkus to be exact. Check out the web page. Pure Cirkus is a freaking amazing group of people. I've been going to their shows for awhile and loved every one of them. When they sent out a notice saying they were looking for new techs, I joined up. We have everything from fire dancers, grinder girls, clowns, acro-balancing and contortionists to illusions (the Bullet Catch rocks my socks), juggling, piercing suspensions and aerialists. I haven't met everyone in the crew yet, but so far, I really like everyone I have met. It's a big bunch of crazy ass people doing some crazy shit cuz they love it. I don't think I've ever met a more accepting group. Plus the perks are pretty fucking cool too. Whenever they work a club, I get in for free. Get to go back stage. Hang out in the green room with circus performers, bands, and other performers. A couple of weeks ago, I got to work a performance at some corporate Xmas party. Got to tell a bunch of drunk cubicle dwellers to get out of the way, access to the open bar and top notch buffet, and got to hang out in the green room with the band. Good times. Tonight, we worked a show at a rave. We shared a dressing room with some other performers. Hanging out with the sexy santa clause dancer girls, pushing around etarded ravers, helping said sexy santa dancers adjust their costumes. Hell yeah, it's the Cirkus life for me.

But alas, my time with the cirkus is about at an end. My girl and I are moving from Seattle to Baton Rouge in just over a week. We take off on our 3200 mile drive on January 1st. We are heading down there so that she can finish her last year of veterinary school at LSU. My apartment is wasteland of half packed boxes.

Today my 9 year old niece totally schooled me at Wii Boxing. She kicked my ass. There is no way to defend against her Chaotic Windmill Attack. No way. She'd kick Rocky's ass. But I did manage to trounce the 6 year old girl. Aww yeah. I whooped her good. She won't be trash talking me anytime soon.

People, take responsibility for your own actions. You are the one who is ultimately responsible for your own safety and well being.

If you drink too much and do something stupid, say something you probably shouldn't have, or sleep with somebody you probably shouldn't have or normally wouldn't want to sleep with, it's your own fault. Not the bar's fault, not your friends fault, not the alcohol manufacturers fault. IT'S YOUR FAULT THAT YOU DON'T KNOW YOUR OWN LIMITS!! This applies to all of those ladies out there who got trashed, had drunken monkey sex with somebody, then regretted it. Just because you got blotto and fucked somebody doesn't mean you were raped. It just means that you exercised poor judgment and a lack of self control. When you start accusing people of rape because you were drunk and feeling randy, you ruin lives. You can cost people jobs, friends, family, cause their children to be taken away from them, get them thrown in jail all because you don't want to feel slutty. Rape is a serious crime. When people throw around false accusations, it only makes it harder for actual rape victims to find justice and ruins lives. Same deal, if you get drunk and go out and break windows, drive drunk and cause and accident, go home and beat your family, lose your job, etc., it's your own fault. Unless somebody held you down and forcibly poured alcohol down your throat, you chose to drink, knowing that drinking can lead to stupidity and asshat behavior. Be responsible for yourself. Don't count on other people to watch out for you.

If you get lost, drive your car into a wall, down a wrong way street, off a cliff, or onto train tracks currently being used by a train, its your fault, not your GPS systems fault. Just because you have a satellite navigation system doesn't mean that it will drive the car for you. You are still responsible for paying attention to where you are and what is going on around you. To the dumb bitch who is trying to sue the manufacturer of her GPS system because she drove her car in front of a train, IT'S YOUR FAULT YOU STUPID STUPID BITCH!!

If your child is as hyper and out of control as a ferret on meth, it's your own fault. Not TV's fault, not violent video games fault, and it's not the fault of your kids teacher. IT IS YOUR FAULT THAT YOU ARE A BAD PARENT AND HAVE BAD CHILDREN!! And just because your parents may have been shitty, doesn't mean that you are absolved of responsibility for your own kids. Just because you were beaten or molested or neglected or weren't given that pony you always wanted doesn't mean it is acceptable for you to be a shitty parent or a shitty person in general. TAKE RESPONSIBILITY FOR YOUR ACTIONS!!

Same deal with thieves and vandals and other criminals. I don't care if you grew up in a shitty neighborhood/family/etc. It is your own decision to steal a car or mug somebody or smoke crack. Just because you had a shitty life doesn't make it alright to screw my shit up by stealing my stuff or stabbing me.

Here is an especially large FUCK YOU to all the clumsy jackholes who fall on their asses then try to sue somebody else because they slipped/tripped/got drunk/weren't paying attention. If there is a crack in my driveway and you trip over it, don't sue me. You're the one who is supposed to be watching where you are walking. I should sue you for getting blood on my driveway. IT'S YOUR OWN FAULT!! And if it's raining, and you slip and fall, don't try to sue because there was not a wet floor sign out. Of course the floor is going to wet and slippery, it's FREAKIN RAINING YOUR DUMB JACK ASS!!! Use some common sense for gods sake. I think I should organize a class action lawsuit against every asshole in the country who has tied up the legal system and drained tax payer dollars because they can't be responsible for themselves. We should send the message that this sort of douchebaggery will no longer be tolerated.

People refusing to be responsible for themselves is one of the root causes of all that is wrong about this country and culture. "I fell down so I'm going to sue you.", "I got drunk and ran over some children so I'm going to sue the bartender who served me", "My father beat me so it's not my fault I drink alot and beat my kids.", "My GPS told me to turn right so it's not my fault I wasn't paying attention and drove into a train.", "I grew up in the ghetto so it's not my fault I stole that car and stabbed that guy.", "I'm fat because McDonald's serves fattening food." Screw that and screw you for thinking you can make me and the rest of the world responsible for you being a stupid asshat. If you're counting on others for your safety and well being, then you're already fucked.

So, started the new job at the hotel back in January. I got the job as sales manager and my good friend got the general manager job. Pretty good job, pays not great but it was respectable. Overall it had potential. Good to work closely with somebody I like and respect and trust. We both worked hard. I mean really really hard. Unpaid overtime (no overtime pay when you're salary), double shifts, 60+ hour work weeks, working morning, evening and graveyard shifts all in the same week, working well outside my job description because it needed to be done. I made sacrifices for that dam place. We just had a big official inspection with the corporate boys last week. We totally nailed it, I mean REALLY REALLY nailed it. Something like 921 points out of 1000. The place went from so bad that Best Western was going to take away the franchise license to now we are well above average compared to other hotels in the chain. My friend and I went into a hotel that was failing, going under, a real shit hole. In four months, we turned it completely around. Revenues are double what they were the same time last year. Occupancy is way up. Customer complaints are down to zero, all that good hotel stuff. I even brought back business from clients who ditched the place due to how crappy it had gotten. Then it all goes too shit. Two days ago, the day I'm planning on asking the boss for a performance review and a raise, he announces that he sold the place. And that the new owners were taking over in about 1 hour. No notice, no heads up, no nothing, even though this deal had to be in the works for months. The new owner proceeds to bitch and yell at us because we weren't ready for the change over. How the fuck were we supposed to be ready when we didn't know about it? Then the fucker then lays some lies on us that there will be some big changes, but nobody is getting fired. He was talking about rearranging the offices, moving my office upstairs, what my plans are for the near future of the hotel, and a bunch of other shit. Then today, after pumping me for everything I know about the place, the bastard tells me that my position does not fit into the budget and that I am fired. No notice, no real reason why, nothing. Doesn't fit into the budget my ass! If he would've looked at my numbers he would've seen that I alone had been bringing in 25k-30k in revenue a month since I started. And my projections for the next few months were even better. That's about a third of the total revenue for the whole hotel. I made the place that much money and he fucking tells me that I don't fit into the budget. Fuck him. I want my job back. The bastard doesn't even have the decency to give me a severance package. He said that the old owner would have to pay that. Even though he is the one who fired me after he officially took control of the place. Of course, the old owner won't pay up either. He says it is up to the new guy. Fucking bitches. I'm gonna sick Labor and Industry and OSHA on them. No over time paying, labor law violating, running the whole place on pirated software mother fuckers. Yeah, if you can't tell, I'm a bit bitter.

V for Vendetta = amazing flick
yay
I'm so glad that this one didn't suck. I was kinda worried. But I was not disapointed. Go see it.

Being sick all the time = suckiest bunch of sucks that ever sucked
acid reflux disease is weak. that's what i get for messin with those whitechicks.

Some dumbass with a gun robbing over a dozen hotels, including the one that I work at = scary shit
At least I wasn't there when the asshole hit the place. Normally, once a thief hits a place up, you don't have to worry about him coming back for a good long while. But this dumb motherfucker is dumb. He has hit several places more than once. Dam.

Send me love. I'm a sick boy. We're still waiting to find out how sick. But pretty dam sick so far. Don't worry too much though. I'm still the mosts hardcore badass muthafucka you're ever goinig to meet. We're talking Deliverator badass here. Black clad ninja of the night with hand tooled snake skin cowboy boots and a duster down to here. Feels like gritty jello and stops like a stack of phone books. Phear my crypto.

music
movies
microcode

Suck it Trebeck!

RANT AHEAD
You have been warned.
Too mnay bills, not enough money. Gonna have to go under the knife soon cuz I'm sick. Girlfriend over seas at school. Unappreciated and overworked at the lame job. But other than that, it's all groovy. Ok, that's better. Had to get that out. Send me some love people!

DVR is really cool. Cool like the darkside is cool cuz TV is evil, but still cool.

Facism looms on the horizon. We're this close --> <-- to invading Iran and N. Korea. Just you wait and see. All is proceeding as planned.

Their is a homeless guy living in the stair well at my hotel. He sleeps at the top of the stairwell. My boss wants us to call the police the next time he goes up there. But I'm not down with hassling some poor guy becuase he's not invulnerable to the cold. For being family friendly mormons, they're not very charitable.

Here's some good news. The Haunted House is on this year! SCARELIVES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! MUA HA HA HA HA!!! Oh the screams will flow like blood once again!!! New location. Not in the freakin dirt mall again god. We get total creative control this time. No Rotary club or city council breathing down our necks over being 'family friendly'. Sweet. The location is in Redmond of all places. Desmoines, to Federal Way to Redmond. SCARE is well traveled. But we get to have an indoor/outdoor show! Hell yeah. The whole park to roam in. Teeheehee! I want to be a sasqatch! That would rule. More on this as the detail unfold.

Have you ever seen a chorus line of pirates and monkeys? It looks something like this

ARRR!!! ooo aaa ARRR!!! ooo aaa ARRR!!! ooo aaa ARRR!!! ooo aaa

I went to the SG Burlesque show in Seattle tonight. Absolutely amazing! The SG's were all good sports and signed my shirt for me. And Tsu Shi Ma Mi Re were incredible! Lucky for me, they are going play Seattle again in a couple of weeks. More details later. Right now I am very very tired.