check out my snake and other funny pics



also i m dying part of my hair red today!

no internet no phone no money ill update when possible

Todd is dying my hair tonight!! I love doing my hair. I dont know if I will do both colors tonight or just one, we will have to see how ambitious we feel. Not doing anything exciting tonight other than that. Probably drink and cuddle with my kitties while we play resident evil or finish watching lord of the rings. I watched some episodes of legend of the seeker. I like it, its funny. It is kinda, well actually very cheesey. But what is not to love about wizzards, magic, evil creatures, and all that good shit.

I am so incredibly happy. My boyfriend came by to pick up some more of this things the other day and we ended up getting back together. I cant imagine facing the dark void with anyone else but him. Honestly I knew that things would get better over time but no one else would ever be able to take his place or come close. I think he feels the same way. I cant even begin to express how elated I am.

I need a day off from work to just gather my thoughts. Shit is tough and I dont know if I am making the right choices. I officially no longer have a phone but it really doesnt bother me too much.

ive been bouncing around from being really depressed to semi okay. Today I feel pretty good. I really want some new tattoos who doesnt? I have some good ideas. My leg sleeve is going to have to wait because obviously its going to be a lot of money. I should have some money to get a fairly decently sized tattoo soon though. I want a tarantula tattoo on my foot. I also want die die my darling tattooed on my ribs with the girl and the glass. I want a headless horsemen tattoo with his tree. On my leg sleeve there wil be a snake from my hip to my foot. The lilly and herman munster. thor my black cat. a naked warrior girl riding an evil unicorn. some pumpkins. castlevania castle and moon with zombies and shit. RAD

Dying from insurmountable losses
At the clutch of black agony
Pain fills the void
Drowning in my private sorrows
No desire to surface above
When I feel something other than pain it is if it was imagined
Counterfeit smiles and forged conversations
The grasp around my heart tightens
Unlimited misery
This falsity fashions me numb



I wrote this poem this morning

So I made a work appropriate list on my ipod for the daytime when my other boss is around sometimes. It has some misfits agent orange hendrix and metallica. Well a metallica song came on and my boss was like this is too metal your going to need to turn this down. Inside I almost about died laughing but I turned it down anyways. What did piss me off though is after I took my i pod off he put his on and it was a bunch of gangster rap shit. and it was atrocious and he was totally fine with playing that in front of customers. This blew my mind , is rap more socially acceptable than metal. Even if the lyrics are about banging bitches and getting money shit. Metallica certainly never said I got a dick so I make the rules, they may say many things but not that.
Anyways tough day today. Not much one for doing stuff with "family". I actually hate it and leave in more despair than when I showed up. I told everyone I had to work on x mas today even though I dont. I wasnt even planning on saying it I just couldnt bare to think about doing something like this again in the near future. I would prefer to be by myself I think.

Feeling better and better everyday. I think it has been a whole week now. Maybe it was good for me to break up with my boyfriend and be pushed a little bit out of my comfort zone. I feel almost renewed. I got eight coupons for free 12 packs of pepsi products! I was so excited, it was the best thing that happened to me in a while. So I am going to get four packs of each game fuel, sooooo fucking good.

I think I will play more resident evil tonight. For some reason projectile zombie heads makes me crack a quaint smile. Shotgun is my weapon of choice. Furthermore I have decided I really want to be in a band, although I dont know how to play anything. I played violin for nine years though so I think I will teach myself how to play bass.