did you really expect to meet legit people in the "hardcore sxe" room in soulseek? gimmie a break. hardcore kids are the worst. i should know. ive been one for like sixteen years now.

you should kick them in the knees. or the shins.

I love subculturally identified boys who whine about being misunderstood and yet pigeonhole the girls in their subculture.

nah, really, I just hate people.

did you check the dates on that Against Me! tour?

Unfortunitely, the whole Straight Edge scene has been this homo-erotic male bonding, macho, jockular bullshit for quite sometime. Not all the people associated with the Straight Edge scene (which a lot of people do not remember it came out of the PUNK scene) are knuckleheads, but there is an overwhelming majority who are. I still love Minor Threat and all the old hardcore PUNK bands that were Straight Edge. I myself was Straight Edge until it became a very one sided, dogmatic and rulebook oriented movement, I really had nothing in common with, I also decided to experiment and try new things without getting addicted or letting it control my life (aka: obsession). Ian Mackaye stated early on that "Straight Edge was not a set of rules or a movement. It's a anti-obsession, positive thinking idea." After his idea became something he didn't like, no wonder he tries to distance himself from that, but he knows as well you can't escape from your past, and he accepts that. The militant macho boys club crap started as far back as 1982. It became the full on jockular thing in '87 and '88 with alot of the early Revelation bands and others of the like. Dan O'Mahony who was the singer of No For An Answer at the time, during one of our conversations made a wisecrack about how "The Straight Edge scene looks like a 200 man basketball team." That quote still makes me laugh because it's true. The Straight Edge scene for the past 15-20 years has become a haven for reactionary thought and a place wear well-to-do, macho, jockular types reign supreme and it's sickening. Occsionally there will be a band or two that's really good (insert Good, Clean, Fun here) but most the bands I have heard over the years, were either 4th rate Revelation rip off bands, or horrible metal bands with all the reactionary bullshit you would expect from a upper-middle class preppy. Only a few of the old SxE guard remained straight edge, it was personal for them, not a group thing. Most are lets say....True 'til 21. Summarizing this whole rant (and sorry for taking up so much of your journal space) the SxE scene, 90% is nothing but a jockular, latentely homo-erotic boys club of mindless morons who don't know or care about the history of their so called movement and the people involved male AND FEMALE. That's why you had to hear all that ridiculous bullshit on Soulseek. Speaking about Soulseek check out some of the old 80's obscure worldwide hardcore punk on there, some of it will blow your fucking mind. Hope everything is going well for you, and you take care.

[Edited on Oct 21, 2005 2:02AM]

Yar!

I used to 'see' a tow truck driver, and we used to get it on in the tow truck(s). One night, he was using another driver's truck. We got it on, and forgot to toss the condom after.
The other driver found it on the floor of his truck the next morning, and knowing we were the only two that had access to the truck the night before...yeah..well.

First, I think you are great. I enjoy hearing
from you. I like you.

Now on this butt crack stuff, you are absolutely
right. I have no idea about YOUR buttcrack --
I can dream, can't I? -- but if you are in a place like Berkeley California, or the Bay Area
in general, some beautiful young woman will
be bending over in front of you anywhere, and
you are going to see ass, baby, you are going
to see a whole lot of ass. Great, I think. If SG
has taught me one thing -- and it has taught me
many things -- it is to deepen, and enjoy much
more deeply the divine curvaciousness of a woman's body. It is still a sexual response, I
suppose, but it is much more objective, and
aesthetically pleasing to me now than every before. A good looking woman -- and there is
no other kind at SG -- rocks. The concept of all
of you guys simply or complexly, I simply do not
know which, rocks my world.

Besides I hate shame and guilt so much I would
never want anybody to feel bad about the fact
that the new cut to jeans, or whatever it is, has
exposed them to me. I just wish it was possible
to nod and smile, and let the message go forth.
You look great, sister. And that's sure all right
with me. Someday we might get there.

But I did have a genuinely embarrasing moment
today, and if it is not too late, I will try to relate it
briefly. Today was the final in a series of visits to
include my annual checkup with my doctor. I love my doctor. She was born and raised in China, and is an absolutely wonderful and great
looking woman in her early 40's, I'd say. I think
I would have asked her out on a date by now if
she wasn't married. We have great talks everytime I go there. We have a genuine interest in each other. Today, however, for the
very first time she said the magical words "I need
to have you pull down your pants to give you a
rectal exam." I felt horrified. She had never done this before, not to suggest this was anything but fully professional, but it still happens to be my ass, and my johnson, and
my "private parts" that have to be exposed in
such a moment. I immediately thought like a guy
rather than a patient, and worried I would get an
instant erection, or something, my underwear was not perfectly clean as I hadn't had time to
shower to get to this appointment this morning,
whatever horrible remains of my guilt and shame
heritage , engulfed me. So I took off my pants, but I climbed up on her table, and
refused to pull down my underpants, which only
drew more attention to the fact my ass was on the line, so to speak, and then finally I dropped them. She did what she needed to do, and did
a perfectly good job of being entirely professional about this, but I was crushed because I am at least 15 pounds overweight, and now I am sure she thinks I am actually hideous looking, whereas before blah blah blah.

It's all so stupid, and I know it's ridiculous, and
it's not like I didn't actively help create the San
Francisco Counter Culture, and still believe in all
kinds of sexual freedoms, and think that I will not
be the one to stop consenting adults from doing
almost anything except where children or animals are involved. In other words, I am
Joe Exceptional. Except I'm not. I am still a
grubby little Irish Catholic in some final way, and
felt like a god damn fool -- felt real old fashioned
ugly shame -- in spite of everything for a while
today.

But then you send your comment, and your
candor, and you are so great looking, so I get
to feel better just to have you there to listen and
understand how embarassing bare ass at times, but what the hell, it's all just a game. Thanks for being my friend.

PS: If you haven't already, please send me your
email. That's the place for comments that run on
like this one has. Sorry, but of course I'm not.
I am glad you sent me a comment tonight. I have also becoming warm and silly with Hellah
who I hope you know, or hope you meet soon.
The two of you give me a really hopeful take on
another possible future for dear New England.
My kind of people. Blessings on the house.

Drago (Bob)

I've found that most "hardcore sex" guys are all bark and no bite. And they expect all women to be barbie-girl superheros like from the comic books that they read in their momma's basement.

The best embarassing momments are already in my profile. But here's another...
Not really embarassing, but it revealed me. I had a crush on this girl in school. We had Trig together. I didn't think anyone knew I liked this girl. I got called to the backboard to do a problem. The teacher sat with the class, so I was alone and the only one looking back at the class. My crush was in the first row wearing a short skirt. When I'd finished writing on the board and had turned around to explain what I had done, she gave me a little smile. And uncrossed her legs. And pulled her legs apart. Farther. And farther. I lost all reason and memory. I just stood at the front of the class trying not to stare at this girl's panties. I think I said something like, "And that's what I did." And hurried to my seat before my pants got any tighter.

Hello, I was kinda bored tonight, well like most nights after work, anyway I wanted a new desktop and SG type one. So I flipped threw some of the sets of my fav SG girls looking for a pic, one of yours sparked a little inspiration and
this was created. I really like it and I m thinking about posting i on the boards but I'd like to have your approval on it first,this is just a small 800x600 version, I made the original bigger but on my crappy net connection with this comp it would take forever. If you could get back to me on what you think about it it would b great, thanks

Ohh yeah lol and one of my man embarrasing moments, to keep with the a few of the posts almost getting caught by the at the time girlfriends parents, I was making my escape as usual out the window on the second floor, just shimmied my way down then a small leap to the ground no prob done it a million times, next step over the fence then sprint my ass home. Well this time around I went to make my bound over the fence and my chains/pantleg get caught on the fence which is a wooden fence so nails were poking out and really I guess this was only a matter of time deal. I dont make it over for obvious reason, but heres the fun part I fall over the other side still haning smack face first in to the other side so ouch then this lovely crasmanship of a fence decides to come down..and into their pool the kind with the plastick type walls that if hit hard enough bust, so ohh yeah they were hit hard enough and I m now rushing my way across their neighbors year with a fence attached to me. My girlfriend watching and laughing at the whole thing along side her two sisters and brother, this is where her dad make his enterance her dad rushs out the back door, first puzzled then eyeing me down like a hawk. I didnt really have time to be embarresed at that moment cause I was still in the process of making a get away but damn did I catch hell at school the next day well next couple weeks.
-Spider

[Edited on Oct 23, 2005 12:53AM]