So happy holidays, end of the world, whatever.

Sort of wish the world had ended because people are pissing me off so much at the moment. But then things are good, too.

Well, here are some photoshoot pictures from lately...



xx

Natural Beauty and why it pisses me off.

A rant by Shilo.

I am the first to admit I'm not naturally pretty. Hell, it takes so much work just for me to pass as a female human being it's not even funny.

I don't feel comfortable, or happy, or myself without my dyed hair, my drawn on eyebrows, my hair extensions, and the rest of my "fakeness."

So why do people think it's okay to tell me "I'd be so much prettier naturally."?

I don't think I would be. Fuck off. I will look however the fuck I want and it is none of your business. It's not your face.

Hey! It's been a while...

Still in a bit of a weird situation SG-wise, so not shooting another set until I'm 100% financially independent for part of my deal with my mum, for want of a better word. She means a lot to me and I don't want to upset her, but so does SG and being myself! I hope I can prove to her that this is good for me...

Still modeling a lot! You can keep up to date with me on ModelMayhem and Zivity and my Facebook page!

NOT on hiatus/archiving, just indefinite as to when the next set will be up, which sucks but is really out of my control if I want to maintain a good relationship with my mum.

In other news, school going awesome, blue hair, and a guinea pig, which this blog is going to be just a bunch of pictures of her...here you go!





I LOVE HER SO MUCH <3 CRUMPET <3

I hate my job. I hate my controlling, not-even-boss telling me to "grow up" and being rude and disrespectul.

I hate that I have cried practically nonstop since getting off work.

Most of all I hate feeling like I have no control.

Read this first of all.

My friend is in town, staying with another friend, and after hanging out I figured I’d make sure he got back to his friend’s place in Wicker safely, so I went with him. Within a minute of getting off the train, I see a wanted poster for this guy. After this, I’m pretty freaked out but me and my friend begin walking to the house. My friend stops for a second, saying he needs to look up directions quickly, so we do and he tells me that actually the guys behind us were making gestures and talking about me while I was looking at the fucking poster, and that they seemed to be following us.

So at this point I’m actually getting really scared.

And I was able to walk down STANLEY HIGH STREET in the UK last summer…I’m usually pretty confident in my ability to defend myself despite being what is considered “petite.” I also hate the whole “be with a friend, don’t walk alone at night…” victim blaming thing, and don’t want to buy into that.

But tonight I had to. I had my male friend walk me back to the CTA because that was how frightened I felt for my own safety.

Nobody, male or female, should ever feel that threatened because of assholes like this guy or the guys who were following and talking about me.

Hey guys!



I'm back in Boston, seeing my family (things are better for the most part!) and helping organize gay pride in the city! Yay! And just catching up with friends here.

I return to Chicago mid June and I have a summer job and hopefully will be shooting another set! I really need a pink haired one hehe!

It sounds cheesy, but I was bored today and on the SG Youtube channel and I just got this weird sense of pride...like I'm fucking PROUD to be a part of this community and redefining beauty. It's awesome, and I've met so many great people here. Thank you to you all <3

Also, on a completely unrelated note, this video has been on pretty much all day...



Ooh, and I'm seeing Garbage in August! So excited! I've loved them since I was about 14! The new album's amazing, by the way!

S x

Looks like I'm staying at school now haha.

Getting an apartment next year and a guinea pig to look after.

And shooting with Writeboy and Baldii McGuiness of Lockjaw this weekend! Yay!

Here are some photos of my recent pink haired adventures.













The last one is my ex boyfriend's jacket, which I am returning to him tomorrow.

S xx

The future is scary. But I think I know what I want to do. I've done a lot of reflection on myself and my life right now and I think I need to stop worrying about what other people think, maybe even including my mother. I need to do what makes ME happy.

Drop out of this school, start at another that won't put me into so much debt maybe, continue modeling, start burlesque classes, be my fucking self and not some fashion drone.

I don’t want to be a part of that world. It isn’t me. I’m creative, and I’m more than capable of succeeding in fashion, but the truth is I’m not enough of a bitch to make it anywhere. And I wouldn’t have it any other way. I’d rather not have to trample other people down to get to the top, which is basically what you have to do in fashion.

I’ll be myself. I’ll be clever. I'll be naked. I’ll do things you might not always like. But at least I’ll be happy and not feeling like I have to conform to any stupid stereotype. Fuck being a pretentious artist. Fuck it. I’d maintain more dignity taking my clothes off than I would staying in this department.

I’m making this realization now, and it feels great.

In other news, dying my hair pink today I think.

Update:

Wanna see how I look blonde?

Okay.




Meow.