PICS
up L8 y'all. just thought i'd leave ya with a little poem i've been working on. a midnight snack if you will. 
"cerebral parsley"
the sound of fingers typing
seven juicy mangoes riping
my erogenous panpiper piping
jazzhandz!
"cerebral parsley"
the sound of fingers typing
seven juicy mangoes riping
my erogenous panpiper piping
jazzhandz!
I am in my last 2 weeks of school term, so anything i could possibly write is going to be school related. this translates into really, really boring. but read on, i dare you. I am struggling to design a sculpture for an assignment. The assignement being to create a 3 dimensional object based on some vague reference to a modernist architect and perhaps using some concept of the elements, i.e. earth, fire, ect. i am at a loss. i think i need to learn how to pour concrete. i'm cutting up books and coffee holders. and watching a documentary on tadao ando, beautiful japanese architect. builds with concrete these kind of still, almost existential spaces. i haven't done my laundry in i can't even remeber how long.
i am new to this whole journaling/blogging thing and i sort of despise it and made a vow (in my head) never to take part in this trend. but here i am, asked to blog, waiting for my nudy pictures to be posted on the internet for all my familly and friends and strangers to see and ruining, once and for all, any political aspirations or hopes of being miss america. as a prolog, or problog (i couldn't resist the pun), i am a terrible speller. really bad. so here it goes:
3 ideas on why sg and/or sex work turns me on:
1.
in a culture that fully legitmizes such behavior, i am on a daily basis unconsentingly object to other's desire. in this forum, in which i have chosen to strip and objectify myself, i am in control of that desire. i consent to being desired, and in fact myself desire it.
2.
the idea of someone, possibly, jerking off to me. don't feel obligated, but i would like it.
3.
vanity. i am vain. seriously. i take far too much stock in my appearance and being deemed hot by just about anyone, let alone a company like sg who's job is finding hot, is validating in a fucked up i need to call my psychologist kind of way. i really need to call my psychologist.
*note to all the children out there: this kind of validation is ultimately unrewarding and a symptom of insecurity. your self-esteem should not be linked to your appearance. read a book!
3 ideas on why sg and/or sex work turns me on:
1.
in a culture that fully legitmizes such behavior, i am on a daily basis unconsentingly object to other's desire. in this forum, in which i have chosen to strip and objectify myself, i am in control of that desire. i consent to being desired, and in fact myself desire it.
2.
the idea of someone, possibly, jerking off to me. don't feel obligated, but i would like it.
3.
vanity. i am vain. seriously. i take far too much stock in my appearance and being deemed hot by just about anyone, let alone a company like sg who's job is finding hot, is validating in a fucked up i need to call my psychologist kind of way. i really need to call my psychologist.
*note to all the children out there: this kind of validation is ultimately unrewarding and a symptom of insecurity. your self-esteem should not be linked to your appearance. read a book!
