PICS
Proud of myself : may sound ridiculous to some, but I was able to do 5 real push ups. For the first time ever! Plus 60 girly ones. Yeah for crossfit training!
I don't even have the words to express how i'm feeling today. A few weeks ago, I could of said that I was lucky not to have ever lost a friend or family member. Then one of my old friend died.
This morning I got the news that my ex (thankfully not my kiddos' dad) had passed. I still don't know what happenned. He was in Costa Rica. An accident, agression, suicide... Don't know. I really loved this guy. He was a good person, but with commitment issues. It ended because I wanted more and he couldn't give it to me. He actually is one of the reasons why I went ahead with the whole single-mom-baby project. Made me realise that maybe I was never gonna find anyone to love me enough to want to embarck on the family path with me.
Anyway... I am freakin out. I probably shouldn't, it's been more than a year, but we still chatted from time to time. I am gonna miss him. He was so close to his family, his parents and his sister, I can just imagine how devastated they're gonna be. This is so unfair.
This morning I got the news that my ex (thankfully not my kiddos' dad) had passed. I still don't know what happenned. He was in Costa Rica. An accident, agression, suicide... Don't know. I really loved this guy. He was a good person, but with commitment issues. It ended because I wanted more and he couldn't give it to me. He actually is one of the reasons why I went ahead with the whole single-mom-baby project. Made me realise that maybe I was never gonna find anyone to love me enough to want to embarck on the family path with me.
Anyway... I am freakin out. I probably shouldn't, it's been more than a year, but we still chatted from time to time. I am gonna miss him. He was so close to his family, his parents and his sister, I can just imagine how devastated they're gonna be. This is so unfair.
Tonight, I am going out 
First time in a year, first time I leave my bb, first time she'll be far from my boobies...
Scary!
First time in a year, first time I leave my bb, first time she'll be far from my boobies...
Scary!
Yippee I'm a new mommy! This was my hardest delivery, ending in an emergency c-section, but my little girl is perfectly healthy, beautiful and awesomely lovely!
I know lately all i've been talking about is pregnancy, birth... And it's not over hahaha!!!!
Us :
I know lately all i've been talking about is pregnancy, birth... And it's not over hahaha!!!!
Us :
I got my induction date : Jan 2nd, little Clemence will be born. I am stressed, excited, nervous, anxious... Arghhhh!
Time flew by way too fast!
Time flew by way too fast!
I am not a big pet person. I have two cats at home, for my daughters, and my girls really love them.
One of them has started peeing and pooping in MY BED. I have zero patience with that. At first I made sure to clean the box even more often, then I bought a new one. I am pregnant and I think that's wh the fuckin cat is reacting. Thing is, there is no way in hell I'm gonna close my bedroom door days in days out ( anyway i'm gonna share by bedroom with my little bb in 7 days)
If it was just me, I would just give her away or have her put down. I know, I'm mean. But really, I have no time and no tolerance for stupid ass animals. But I am trying to teach my dayghters that animals are for life. That ou can't use them like toys and then get rid of them.
What the fuck am I gonna do I feel so agressive, it's a good thing they are both hiding, I would happily kick their fuckin asses out in the snow .
One of them has started peeing and pooping in MY BED. I have zero patience with that. At first I made sure to clean the box even more often, then I bought a new one. I am pregnant and I think that's wh the fuckin cat is reacting. Thing is, there is no way in hell I'm gonna close my bedroom door days in days out ( anyway i'm gonna share by bedroom with my little bb in 7 days)
If it was just me, I would just give her away or have her put down. I know, I'm mean. But really, I have no time and no tolerance for stupid ass animals. But I am trying to teach my dayghters that animals are for life. That ou can't use them like toys and then get rid of them.
What the fuck am I gonna do
I feel so agressive, it's a good thing they are both hiding, I would happily kick their fuckin asses out in the snow .Office (well, emergency dept.) Christmas party tonight, yippee!! Last year was such a blast, plus i've been on maternity leave for the last 5 months, I miss my co-workers.
Happy!!!
Happy!!!
Ethical point of view. Please respect it.
I had this very good friend a few years back. We were always together, partying, working, going to the same college... I'm a bit older than her so eventually we grew appart. Which is super normal I think. We still talk a few times a years.
She got hit by a bus on Halloween night. Badly. At first the news were saying that she actually died on site. Then I learned that she survived, but was in critical condition. Getting any kind of news was a bit difficult. I didn't feel close enough anymore to go to the icu, and her parents weren't answering phone calls or emails. I got a bit of information from one of our mutual friend with whom she stayed close. And everthing I heard was so bad I couldn't believe her parents were letting all that happen to her. She had multiple intracranial bleeds, was operated on 4 times (well, so far) induced coma, a while later she got a tracheotomy... I'm a trauma er nurse. I know the odds of making it. But since her parents weren't sharing any information, and had forbidden the medical staff to say anything to anyone besides them, I hoped she was one of the lucky ones. Her friend was telling me that she was being fed and that she had opened her eyes... But was still in a coma.
For my pregnancy I am followed at the same hospital were she is. Yesterday, I had my regular weekly apointment. While I was waiting for the elevator, the doors opened. And she was there, in a bed. Hooked up to every life supporting machin known to man. Half her skull missing. Her skin gray and clammy. Her eyes open but blind. A trach tube in her neck. I was in total shock. Although I knew that she was probably much worst than her family was letting believe, I didn't imagine she was that bad. It is obvious that she got injured beyond what they let us believe. My old friend is not there anymore. What the fuck are her parents doing to her? Maintaining her alive, why? If she could see herself right now, she would be devastated. After 6 weeks of coma, with such extensive injuries, who are they kidding. I can kind of see why, she is 25 years old. She had all her life in front of her. But she's not there anymore. She's in a vegetative state.
Fuck, just let her go. It's torture.
I had this very good friend a few years back. We were always together, partying, working, going to the same college... I'm a bit older than her so eventually we grew appart. Which is super normal I think. We still talk a few times a years.
She got hit by a bus on Halloween night. Badly. At first the news were saying that she actually died on site. Then I learned that she survived, but was in critical condition. Getting any kind of news was a bit difficult. I didn't feel close enough anymore to go to the icu, and her parents weren't answering phone calls or emails. I got a bit of information from one of our mutual friend with whom she stayed close. And everthing I heard was so bad I couldn't believe her parents were letting all that happen to her. She had multiple intracranial bleeds, was operated on 4 times (well, so far) induced coma, a while later she got a tracheotomy... I'm a trauma er nurse. I know the odds of making it. But since her parents weren't sharing any information, and had forbidden the medical staff to say anything to anyone besides them, I hoped she was one of the lucky ones. Her friend was telling me that she was being fed and that she had opened her eyes... But was still in a coma.
For my pregnancy I am followed at the same hospital were she is. Yesterday, I had my regular weekly apointment. While I was waiting for the elevator, the doors opened. And she was there, in a bed. Hooked up to every life supporting machin known to man. Half her skull missing. Her skin gray and clammy. Her eyes open but blind. A trach tube in her neck. I was in total shock. Although I knew that she was probably much worst than her family was letting believe, I didn't imagine she was that bad. It is obvious that she got injured beyond what they let us believe. My old friend is not there anymore. What the fuck are her parents doing to her? Maintaining her alive, why? If she could see herself right now, she would be devastated. After 6 weeks of coma, with such extensive injuries, who are they kidding. I can kind of see why, she is 25 years old. She had all her life in front of her. But she's not there anymore. She's in a vegetative state.
Fuck, just let her go. It's torture.
I must be lazy. I have been on preventive leave from work for now 14 weeks. And I love it 
I am not bored, I feel rested and calm. I can take one hour to have breakfast. Afternoon naps are the bomb.Who cares! I have nothing better to do! This is awesome. I usually work 45-50 hours a week in an ER. Plus overtime. I love to work and I am lucky to really enjoy my job. But apparently, I am no workaholic. I will be happy to go back to work next year, but in the meantime, yeah for lazyness!
I am not bored, I feel rested and calm. I can take one hour to have breakfast. Afternoon naps are the bomb.Who cares! I have nothing better to do! This is awesome. I usually work 45-50 hours a week in an ER. Plus overtime. I love to work and I am lucky to really enjoy my job. But apparently, I am no workaholic. I will be happy to go back to work next year, but in the meantime, yeah for lazyness!