SuicideGirl: Nancy
suicidegirl

Nancy likes music, comic books and RPG. She also enjoys being a huge dick.

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JUNE 23, 2008 @ 10:14 AM | 15 COMMENTS

MAY 21, 2008 @ 07:51 PM | 15 COMMENTS

I'm such a weird person. I've been thinking and really, compared to my friends and other people I know, I seem like a freak. I can't stop moving EVER; during classes in school I always do kiddy like stuff, such as pulling my legs up on the chair and holding my knees to my chest, I'm constantly observing people and when they look back at me I either smile or make a really weird face. Sometimes I can read their minds: "WOW YOU ARE SUCH A WEIRDO, STOP STARING". I have some awkward crazy habits, but heeey, I can't help them!

I'll also yawn and make loud noises and more weird faces when I'm in random places and people will gave me looks.... the kind of look you know they are laughing inside but they don't wanna be rude so they just keep it to themselves. I just find it funny, I'm not complaining... I also cuss out a LOT, especially when I'm around my bandmates and old high school friends. Earlier today I was in school and I used the word fuck and I don't know what else and my classmate mocked me???? I was like, shut up you I'll cuss out if I want to! Damn it, she was like my mom even though mom would have been more like "WATCH YO MOUTH, GURL!!" Except she wouldn't speak like that 'cause she's a lawyer and all ~polite. OH LOL.

My dad texted me today saying that we won't be able to get together to play cards this weekend because he has work on Saturday and Sunday.... it sucks, I feel bad for him. He stills helps me pay for school. I miss hanging out with him sometimes and listening to him speak about the recent crimes in our city and such; and the way he hugs me like he's never going to see me again. It freakin' sucks that I'm a twenty year old still all bitter about my parents divorce. My mom is now single although I'm not really sure she's looking (she probably is considering she's been taking dancing classes for a few weeks now) while my dad lives in this house with the woman he chated on my mom with. How classy, I know. But I'm over it and we get along anow. Yeah, whatever. I don't even know why I'm writing about this in here.

TOMORROW I DON'T HAVE WORK BECAUSE IT'S A HOLIDAY! LIFE IS JUST SO AMAZING. My band is performing on Friday (we're headlining this time, wow) and I'm kind of excited, just kind of.

Oh, I wrote a new song on Wednesday and as soon as I fix up some stuff in it, I'm going to put a video up on YouTube. Some people who saw my other video have been asking me for more and I haven't really written something like that in a while. It's been all about ~rock'n'roll~ lately, but I missed writing cute songs on the keyboard.


I'm off to eat some lasagna now. Mmmmm smile
xo
Nanc-
MAY 21, 2008 @ 07:51 PM | 15 COMMENTS

I want a delete button right now, SG.
MAY 18, 2008 @ 01:17 PM | 15 COMMENTS

I finally have new pictures. Last night's party was a killer! I hadn't had that much fun with my old friends in a while. Even DJed for a bit there, something I hadn't done in foreverrrr. I'll never get tired of watching everyone on the dancefloor dance to Queen and Ray Charles though; that will always make my nights.

SPOILERS! (Click to view)

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zoom image Ju and Ju!

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zoom image I love that picture, even though the focus sucks.
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zoom image Yeah, I know who I look like in these last two pictures.
zoom image The difference between us is that I'm prettier, younger and probably a much better musician. wink



There were just so many FRIENDS of mine there it was kind of crazy. This one girl I know approached me in the entrance right after we got in and started talking about how she doesn't know if she likes girls or not and that she cares too much about what other people think.......... yes................ I had to deal with that.............. But it's cool, I gave her some advice and tried helping out before going to the bar to get some beer. Later on I was waiting in the bathroom line and then two guys and a girl tried to get in the front of us and I kind of yelled at them? JKNKDSJK I hate it when people do that, anyway... so they took off and this random girl tried to do the same, only it was my turn and she was right in front of me... so she asked me if I was on the line and I said yes and gave her a FUCK OFF BITCH look (those are awesome) and she looked at me and narrowed her eyes before asking "Don't you sing for that one band...." LOL kjnkls snjks mskms oh my God, I said yes, gave her a small smile and ran into the bathroom because I really didn't know what else to say.

I forgot to mention in my latest post that I took spoiled medicine last Saturday and had an allergy fit sdlkmsdlk it was so awful. Allergies blow. OHHH I got some more results from school and I got 10 in Laguage and Musical Structuration and Vocal Expression Lab! WOOO A+'s. And 8,9 in Vocal Hygiene. I'm still waiting for my Psychology results though... mad Ugh it sucks, I'm so anxious for those. It was the Academic Week in school last week and I saw some nice lectures about autism and musical education x music therapy. There were a lot more, but I couldn't attend to them because I had work. Eehhhh. frown

I don't have much to say today, so I'll just go now. My band mates are waiting for me UNFORTUNATELY. Sigh.

Have a great week you guys,
xo
Nanc-

MAY 12, 2008 @ 08:29 PM | 15 COMMENTS

I fucking hate writing songs with my band mates.



It's so awful; we never agree on much and it gets worse because I get so easily annoyed… earlier tonight we got together to finish this one song (we actually started it like, yesterday) and after 2 hours trapped in a room with them I just had to leave. It fucking sucks to be the only chick among four guys. I should be used to it now since I've always had more guy friends than girls, but it still freaks me out from time to time. What makes me really, really MAD is that sometimes they argue with me about things concerning music that I'm sure of and it isn't a secret to any of us that I know more about that than any of them. So I'm like, CAN YOU PLEASE SHUT UP???? Tonight we were all giving each other our opinions on what should be changed about this latest song and when I told the bassist that he could change one note he was playing (ONE NOTE OH MY GOD HOW HARD IS THAT), our guitarist was like "he can't do that because the bass always does the same as the guitar". As in, he was playing a G minor and the bassist had to play a G as well, he couldn't do anything other than that. And he knows everything about scales and such (opposite from the bassist, who doesn't know SHIT) and STILL he said that???? I'm like, what kind of fucking guitarist ARE you?

Then the bassist tried a Bb and it wouldn't do because that's the note he was supposed to play next. Alright. He tried a C and it didn't work as well. It was okay with me???? Then I told him to try a F# because that's a 7+ and it usually makes things sound a little havier. Guess what? It wasn't fucking good enough either!!!! "Hummm, that doesn't sound good to me…" is all they would freaking say. The bassist, oh, the fact that he'd say that didn't bother me that much because he just says whatever pleases our guitarist since he doesn't know shit and doesn't want to sound dumb. But the freakin' guitarist…

After I gave up trying to teach them that HE COULD DO THAT BECAUSE IT'S IN THE FUCKING G SCALE and it didn't sound bad at all followed by the Bb (NOTE: THEY DIDN'T EVEN WAIT UNTIL THE Bb???? They'd just play it til the note I suggested and were like "HUM NO IT SUCKS"), I said "fuck this, I'm leaving."

Lol, they didn't want to let me leave. The were all "you gotta stay here because we need your opinions…" so I told them I had nothing left to say. And really, I didn't. That was the one thing I hadn't said yet, if I'd stay there I'd just start yelling at them and tell everyone to go suck a big fat cock.

That's how I work. Take it or leave it, I don't have the fucking patience anymore to deal with this kind of shit.

I was already kind of pissed before that because the guy who does the screams wouldn't make up his mind about the parts he wanted to scream on that song. All we got done was the chorus. Every time we played the damn thing he would scream now and then in the fucking end and then in the beginning of a sentence again, and the middle, and he would change it every time. I wrote the lyrics for the chorus and was trying to think of something else, but there was no way in hell I would do it with him being like that.

So, I BOTHERED explaining to them that I was mad already and it'd be worse if I stayed, hugged them goodbye and left.

Came home, ate some good old Pringles and vented to someone who cares. Now I'm listening to Emery and holy shit, are they amazing.

Farewell,
xoxo
Nanc-

MAY 8, 2008 @ 07:25 PM | 15 COMMENTS

I don't care what people say about Amy fucking Winehouse, she's so talented.

So talented.

She might be a crackhead or whatever, miss her own shows and beat up her husband, but I don't give a rat's ass about her personal life. Her voice is so unique and she's so full of swingdsdnjksn it makes me jealous. I've become such a sucker for her…Amy never fails to amaze me with her style. Guess that as a musician and teacher I've learnt to appreciate many kinds of music, even though I still HATE some stuff and I don't believe I'll ever be able to enjoy it. Some of my students are like "OH HAY I LIKE BRAZILIAN COUNTRY MUSIC AND I WANNA SING THAT" or "I'M IN THIS SAMBA GROUP" and I'm all "OH nice....................................." as in "GTFO YOU SUCK". I wish I could say that and only deal with the ones who are all about classic rock, pop, jazz and blues, some bebop, bossa nova, PBM... but hey, life isn't always that amazing.

Wow, dejá vu. I'm sure I've written about her before in this blog.

Ugh I'm still so pissed about my results for the anato-fisiology classes in schoolsjksnksdjdsk I studied so fucking HARD for my exam, I thought I was so very prepared to it... guess what my grade was? 5,8. Yeah. It was worth 10 points. I got 5,8. The highest among our group was 7,8. Isn't that frustrating? I was so fucking MAD after our professor gave back our tests that I just left. I still had one class after that but I just couldn't attend to it. LMAO srsly I always get mad when I get bad results knowing that I've studied hard. And it's not like I hate that class, I love it! Anatomy and fisiology fascinate me. I wonder what would have happened if I didn't study at all... I'm always fucking studying. I never complain, I don't have a reason to. But this?! KJSNKSS we had like three exams that day! THREE. On the other hand, I got a 10 in Music Therapy Foundations to make up to it. OHHH I love straight A's. I also had Psychomotricity and Developmental Psychology exams this week... I'm waiting for A's as well.

On another note, I'd like you to stop being married. Yes, you.


xoxo
Nanc- whatever
MAY 4, 2008 @ 07:13 PM | 15 COMMENTS

I always have so much fun recording videos... the stupider, the better! NOW GO WATCH IT. No, don't! AAAAHHHHHHHhhhhhhhhh

[VIDEO][/VIDEO]

I forgot to mention I have big hands and big feet, but I guess that's obvious and not really relevant... hahaha whatever go, me. Doesn't it seem like a X-mas-y video or something? If only I had been wearing green socks... oh, ew.

Yesterday I wrote a song and I'm definitely not using it for my band. It doesn't have anything to do with our music and it's a little bit too personal to just use it like that. I'm so awful with the things I write. I don't like showing it to people and the minute I start writing lyrics I just get away from everyone, lock myself up in a room and start writing non-stop until it's almost finished. Then people come up to me all 'let me read the lyrics!!!' or 'play to meeeeee', and I'm like, uhm no. I'm just too timid to do that I guess frown maybe it's the perspective that it won't be good enough. I like hearing "that was amazing" and not "that was good".It frustrates me. KJnjknsç,sçalm,

Emotional crisis, here i go.
xo
nanc-
APRIL 18, 2008 @ 08:43 PM | 15 COMMENTS

My band's myspace.

You guys asked, so... there it is! I just think you'll need good speakers to listen, but apart from that.. enjoy!
And add us if you think we're worth it. biggrin To your top friends, even! kiss

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My arm hurts, I'm hoarse and life's amazing. Also, I've been addicted to gum since classes started and I can't stop blowing bubbles every 5 seconds. I'm soooo annoying.

Love
xo
Nanc-
MARCH 15, 2008 @ 09:05 AM | 15 COMMENTS

Woah, I finally have pictures!

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At this partyyy pretending to be 80s/new rave a couple of weeks ago
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Remember I said something about applying to college? Well, I got through! Hell, yeah! Hahaha I think we all knew that would happen since it's not hard in the least bit to pass those exams I took to enter college... I just had two music and two Portuguese tests, and reaaaaaaally, my Portuguese skills are pretty awesome if I do say so myself. So yeah, here I am now, back into classrooms and studying non-stop.

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I'm srsly a retard
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There's these three books I gotta read before April begins. The first one is about psychomotricity, the other's about music therapy and its psychoanalytical aspects and the last concerns voice and phonoaudiology. How weird is it the fact that i'm really, really thrilled about being back in school even though it wears me out like no tomorrow? Working and studying at the same time is kind of complex, and I'm also in two bands and I might start doing some volunteer work soon. Ughhh my life.

SPOILERS! (Click to view)

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Ohhh they're bigger than they seem to be, believe moi



On the bright side, it feels good to be hella busy again. I mean, sometimes. I spent from last August to March this year doing absolutely nothing and it was crappy and... poor? I never had money, so I started using my savings and that was about the stupidiest thing I could've done. I spent about fifteen hundred on parties, rehearshals and girls stuff when I should have just kept my bank card safe and sound in my closet. Oh well... hopefully I'll start making more money soon just so I can re-fill that gap in my bank account. Kmlkmsalmasdlka this is ridiculous, why do I have to be such a consumist?

SPOILERS! (Click to view)

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Yeah I know, I look gracious............................ wtf puke
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The screamo/post hardcore/what-the-fuck-ever you'd call it band I'm in has been doing a great job lately! We're performing on the 22th in a city near by and in April 18th and 19th (and possibly on the 20th as well) with this band from Santa Catarina (another state in southern Brazil). We might be touring their state briefly in May, but we hasn't set it up yet. Ahhhhhhhhhh I'm so happy about this. People have stopped me on the streets to take picturesasdklflkss I'm not even joking lmao surreal and we aren't even big????? This is freaky.

SPOILERS! (Click to view)

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Yes, I look like a 7 year oldddd
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Welllll that's it for now peoplez, I gotta go snuggle with someone in my bed.
wink
xo
Nanc-

FEBRUARY 21, 2008 @ 09:58 PM | 15 COMMENTS

Guess who's giving singing classes now??? YEAH, YOU GOT IT RIGHT. ME!!! Haha, I'm so excited about this. It's just an internship at the music school where I've studied for years now, but still... ungh it's just so exciting. I'm on my second week there and I already have headaches from all the off key-ness and stuff. Yesterday I basically worked from 1pm to 8pm and had a rehearshal from 8 to 10pm. I got home so freaking drained it isn't even funny. My face and diaphragm hurt SO bad.

I've been there long enough to realize this is a very tiring activity though. For real, I thought my whole body was going to collapse by the time I got home last night. I felt sick to my stomach and almost had to barf... ew gross, I know! But in the end my brother made me some tea and it was all set. By the way, his birthday is on the 1st and I have no clue what to get him...

Any tips? He's basically a WoW soon-to-be 17 year old addict.

Onnnn another note, I think I'm going to school this term. I'll find out in about two weeks... if everything works out, I'm going to be majoring in music therapy. Which means that if I graduate and become a music therapist, I'll probably be completely nuts by the time I hit 30 or something like that. We musicians already seem to be kind of mentally challenged... I can only imagine what dealing with crazy people everyday would do to someone like me in the wrong run!

I wish I had a picture to post, but unfortunately I haven't been fond of cameras lately. God knows why.

Oh, and... I might be shooting a new set soon! wink Haha!

Love you guys,
xo
nanc- tongue

ps; I promise I'll reply to all your messages as soon as I have the chance!
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